Category: Boredom body language

Auto contact or self touching, Boredom body language, Displacement behaviour, Energy Displacement, Metronomic signals, Pensive displays, Self-motivating gestures

Body Language of Tapping The Fingers or Metronomic Signals

by Chris • October 29, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Tapping The Fingers or Metronomic Signals

Cue: Tapping The Fingers or Metronomic Signals.

Synonym(s): Metronomic Signals, Finger Tapping, Foot Tapping, Pencil Tapping, Keyboard Tapping, Mouth Tapping, Lip Tapping, Head Tapping, Drumming.

Description: Tapping or drumming of the feet, fingers, or with the help objects such as pens.

In One Sentence: Metronomic signals show a desire to release extra energy, that a person is anxious, or that thought is taking place.

How To Use it: So long as metronomic signals are not loud or disruptive, they may be useful in telling others that you are in the process of coming up with a solution to a problem. Repetitive actions may also help prime the brain toward a solution by putting the body into motion. In other cases, the release of extra energy can help relax the mind and produce a tactile outlet. Tapping the fingers or toes may also tell others that you need some time to think and shouldn’t be bothered, thus buying some time.

Generally, however, metronomic signals are to be avoided as they signal that one is struggling to process information. One should certainly avoid the signals when they may be construed as indicating boredom – unless one actually wishes to send that signal.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: a) “I’m bored. I’m kicking my feet and tapping my fingers to release some of my pent up energy. Escaping the situation is not practical.” b) “I’m bumping my feet up and down because I need something to do as my anxiety grows. c) “I’m tapping my pen against my lips in effort to keep my energy up to help me find the answer to my problem.”

Variant: See Foot Fidgeting.

Cue In Action: a) The lecture dragged on and on. All he wanted to do was get out of there and enjoy the weekend. His foot bumped up and down. b) On his first date, his foot bounced up and down indicating that he felt a little unsettled. c) He knew the answer, but it wasn’t coming to him. He tapped the pen against his mouth as he worked through his thoughts.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Tapping has three possible main root causes. It can indicate a) boredom, b) anxiety or that c) thought is taking place.

Repetitive tapping is often a sign of boredom. It can include tapping the toes, swinging the feet with one crossed over the other, or drumming the fingers on the table. In a larger context, tapping is a form of energy displacement where the body shows its desire to burn off what it has in excess as it deals with a situation that does not permit one to leave.

The hands and feet are key places to verify anxiety and will be the usual suspects in betraying emotions. They move easily and freely from the rest of the body and can be used to burn energy and release stress anxiety without requiring the body to move large distances. Because they can be moved independent of the body, they also tend to leak information more readily. Therefore, to read anxiety, carefully watch for tapping toes or fingers. Likewise, watch for feet that move frequently or never seem to find a comfortable position as well as any other repetitive behaviours. Foot movements will show more restraint than hand movements especially if someone is trying to hide fear from others.

In other cases, repetitive motions are an indication of a persons desire to motivate themselves. When someone is trying to come up with a solution, we normally see them tap their head with their fingertips or bring their fingertips to their lips. They may also be seen tapping a pencil or pen against their teeth or lips. When the context is appropriate expect tapping to show that a person is trying to jump start their thought process. The tapping is a way for a person to remain active and keep the blood flowing and energy up, as they fight to come up with a solution. This cue is common in the examination room.

Cue Cluster: Anxiety is often accompanied by looking away or becoming distracted, avoiding eye contact, rubbing the hands together, pinching an eyelid, smoothing clothing, rotating a wedding ring, nail-biting, or sucking a finger or pen. These all indicate a hidden thought linked to anxiety.

Boredom is often coupled with sitting slumped over with a glazed look on a person’s face coupled with an staring blankly at the floor or a spot on the wall. People also signal boredom by fidgeting, supporting the head on the hand, leaning against walls or tables, slouching backwards, letting the eyes wonder, gazing into the distance, sighing heavily, yawning, crossing and re-crossing the arms and legs, fiddling with pens, eyeglasses or papers, doodling, pointing the body away from the speaker, shifting weight, moving the head from side to side, rolling the eyes, stretching, and picking at the fingernails.

Tapping as a motivating gesture is indicated primarily through context, such as when writing an examination or while contemplating a move in chess.

Body Language Category: Auto contact or self touching, Boredom body language, Displacement behaviour, Energy Displacement, Metronomic signals, Pensive displays, Self-motivating gestures.

Resources:

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Da Silva, Felipe N. ; Irani, Farzin ; Richard, Jan ; Brensinger, Colleen M. ; Bilker, Warren B. ; Gur, Raquel E. ; Gur, Ruben C. More than just tapping: Index finger-tapping measures procedural learning in schizophrenia. Schizophrenia Research. 2012. 137(1-3): 234-240.

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Farley, James; Risko, Evan F; Kingstone, Alan. Everyday Attention And Lecture Retention: The Effects Of Time, Fidgeting, And Mind Wandering. Frontiers In Psychology, 2013; 4: 619
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Amplifier, Auto contact or self touching, Boredom body language, Courtship display, Displacement behaviour, Embarrassment (nonverbal), Emotional body language, Idiosyncratic body language, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Low confidence body language, Oral displacement activities, Pacifying body language, Pensive displays, Pseudo-infantile gestures, Security blankets, Shy nonverbal, Worry body language

Body Language of Suckling

by Chris • October 28, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Suckling

Cue: Suckling.

Synonym(s): Mouthing An Object, Chewing On A Pen, Pen Sucking, Sucking On A Pen (or other), Oral Fixation.

Description: When any object including pens or fingers are brought to the lips and chewed or sucked on.

In One Sentence: Suckling indicates a need for self-soothing due to negative feelings.

How To Use it: While suckling can help produce comfort, it is not considered a cue that should be used in full view of others as it is unlikely to produce a desirable impression.

Context: a) General. b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I’m in need of an oral fixation to calm my nerves so I’m suckling – on my finger or pen, as I did when I was a baby.”

Variant: See Hand to Mouth, Lip Chewing or Chewing The Lips, Hair Play, Nail Biting.

Cue In Action: a) Debbie was a shy, timid person, she kept her gaze low, easily blushed, and was quiet around strangers. This was especially so when put on the spot or questioned. At her desk, she habitually mouthed pens, paper clips, or chewed on her fingers. a) During the exam, the student mouthed her pen as she suffered through a question she wasn’t familiar with. b) Debbie was thinking about Mark and subconsciously tapped the end of her pen against her lower lip. The pen was a phallic replacement.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The mouth and lips are full of nerve endings which, when stimulated, provides tactile gratification and comfort. However, anytime the fingers go to the mouth such as playing with the side of the mouth or lip, it’s a retrogressive action indicating insecurity. These types of gestures are called “pacifying behaviours” because they are designed to reduce anxiety when someone is exposed to something distressing. Pacifying language tells us that the mind is not at ease, and it is attempting to restore the body’ natural state.

Suckling body language essentially turns us back into babies or at least indicates to others our need for self-soothing due to emotional stress.

Adults that are tense or anxious will play with their mouth or lip. Mouthing a pen, cigarette, hair, and even a piece of gum during emotional distress are substitutes for the mother’s breast. They remind us of early childhood mouthing. Sucking, like plucking, picking or chewing the lips or rubbing them with a finger or thumb are all forms of auto touching. Confident individuals would never consider using these types of security blankets.

Alternatively, an object to the mouth can represent a phallic purpose. Subconscious controls can lead one to bring an object to the mouth during sexual thoughts. The pen for example, can be a substitute for a penis during arousal.

Cue Cluster: Watch for other negative emotional cues such as pinching the skin, scratching, smoothing clothing, eye aversion, head lowered, blushing, trembling, attempt to exit (escape movements), ventral denial, turning the body away, sweating and so forth.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Auto contact or self touching, Boredom body language, Courtship displays, Displacement behaviour, Embarrassment (nonverbal), Emotional body language, Idiosyncratic body language, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Low confidence body language, Oral displacement activities, Pensive displays, Pseudo-infantile gestures, Pacifying body language, Security blankets, Shy nonberbal, Worry body language.

Resources:

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Aggressive body language, Amplifier, Anger body language, Arrogance or arrogant body language, Boredom body language, Disengagement body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Dominant body language, Emotional body language, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Liking, Negative body language, Ownership gesture, Space invasion, Threat displays

Body Language of The Stare, Evil Eye or Unblinking Eye

by Chris • October 28, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of The Stare, Evil Eye or Unblinking Eye

Cue: Staring or The Evil Eye.

Synonym(s): Stink Eye, Dead Man Gaze, Unflinching Stare, Stare, Gaze Fixation, Unblinking Eye, Eye Threat, Eye Darts, Prolonged Eye Contact, Unwavering Gaze, Power Star (the), Unflinching Stare.

Description: These are unblinking staring eyes filled with contempt. The evil eye is an offensive eye pattern where the eyes remain unblinking and threatening or leer at another person for an uncomfortable length of time. Regular gaze happens when the eyes travel around the face and body of someone we care about. Staring, on the other hand, is unmoving. The eyes are piercing and intense and seem to want to penetrate the eyes of another. An aggressive stare is even more intense and happens by narrowing the eyelids creating a deep focus.

In One Sentence: Staring for prolonged period of time is in effort to reduce a person to the status of an object.

How To Use it: Use staring when one wants to intimidate others. Staring harshly during aggression can belittle and degrade. When it is done in a sexual context, staring can diminish a person to a lesser status as an object.

In dating, men might view staring as being a compliment, however, if the feelings are not mutual, women will feel violated due to their perceived powerlessness. Therefore, men should only use staring (see Gazing adoringly) to support an existing emotional connection.

Use staring when one is prepared for the negative outcome. As a signal of dominance, the cue is unmistakable.

Context: a) General b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I’m using inappropriately long and violating eye contact in order to pierce through your exterior in order to threaten and intimidate.”

Variant: See Gazing Adoringly for a more welcome version of The Stare. Also see Eye Avoidance.

Cue In Action: a) Mark was in a stupor and accidentally bumped into a girl. He didn’t know it but she was the girlfriend of the muscle-bound man who immediately threw eye darts in his direction, unflinching and steady. Mark quickly averted his eyes because he knew it wasn’t a fight for him. Despite looking away, he still felt the piercing stare against his body

b) A particularly attractive girl made her way through a crowd, you could see men turn their heads, but one man made the mistake of looking for too long as he followed her through the crowd. She didn’t like the look of him and stared right back. He smiled, but she didn’t reciprocate; only a deadpan face looked back. He quickly averted his eyes.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Staring is built on the assumption that eyes can damage from prolonged looking. It is as if the eyes are able to assault when eye contact is done for too long and without permission. This violates the “moral looking time”, or the unwritten code of conduct we all obey regarding proper eye contact. As a result, it produces negative feelings in others.

a) In most animal species unwavering gaze is used to display dominance and aggression. However, this is only so when it happens between members of the same species. When it happens across species it indicates that a prey has been centered out and the stalk has begun.

Research shows us that a steady stare of more than ten seconds creates anxiety and discomfort especially in subordinates making it a dominant signal especially when this includes direct eye-to-eye contact. When done by two equally dominant individuals it can lead to feelings of aggression and in extreme cases, even produce physical altercations.

b) Eye assault happens when men appear to undress women. In turn, women might appear to give “dirty looks.” We call this “eyeball assault.” Assault is a matter of length and type. Lingering stares of unbroken eye contact is the high of eyeball assault. Eyeball assault, therefore, violates the “moral looking time.” This is an unofficial, but salient length of time by which eye contact (to the body or eyes directly) is permitted and accepted as normal.

When eye contact is welcome, it evolves into gazing which leads to arousal (See Gazing). Sometimes legitimate liking is present and staring is an indication, but it still remains inappropriate and an assault as it is defined by unwavering and an unwanted violation of privacy. Staring can also indicate boredom or disengagement, but only when it is not directed at a person or target (i.e. staring off into space.)

Cue Cluster: Staring eyes are coupled with expressionless or angry faces. The head usually is fixed unless the target is moving.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Arrogance or arrogant body language, Aggressive body language, Anger body language, Boredom body language, Disengagement body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Dominant body language, Emotional body language, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Liking, Negative body language, Ownership gestures, Space invasion, Threat displays.

Resources:

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Aguinis, Herman ; Henle, Christinea. Effects of Nonverbal Behavior on Perceptions of a Female Employee’s Power Bases. The Journal of Social Psychology. 2001 141(4): 537-549.

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Argyle, M. and Cook, M. Gaze and Mutual Gaze. London: Cambridge University Press, 1976.

Allan Mazur; Eugene Rosa; Mark Faupel; Joshua Heller; Russell Leen; Blake Thurman. Physiological Aspects of Communication Via Mutual Gaze. The American Journal of Sociology. 1980; 86(1): 50-74.

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Amplifier, Boredom body language, Comfort body language, Disengagement body language, Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Low confidence body language, Negative body language, Nonthreatening body language, Readiness to submit postures

Body Language of Slouching

by Chris • October 28, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Slouching

Cue: Slouching.

Synonym(s): Body Sag.

Description: The head droops, shoulders hunch, feet are turned inward and the face often shows signs of depression or sadness.

In One Sentence: Slouching is a sign of social withdrawal and/or submission.

How To Use it: Slouching can be used to show dominance when used in the proper context. For example, when high status is already secured, slouching down backwards in a chair can boost the perception even further. Slouching, in the context, show that one is not at risk from a metaphorically attack and does not need to carry an engaged and ready body posture.

When a low ranking person slouches in full view of a higher ranking person, this can show willingness to defy authority. For example, should a rebellious teenager wish to instigate a confrontation, he or she simply needs to slouch as he or she engages in verbal combat. Slouching says, “I don’t care about your attempt at authority, I stand for my own ideas.”

Children can show their distain for the ideas of their parents by slouching forward in defeat. This plays on the emotions of their parents because they see that their decisions have created a sense of powerlessness. The parents, therefore, may think twice about continuing in eliciting submissiveness. Therefore, slouching can be used to manipulate more powerful people by nonverbally signaling defeat.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m bored, disinterested, depressed or tired. As a result my body is going limp and losing its tone.”

Variant: N/A.

Cue In Action: a) He was a typical teenager, slouching in his chair without a care for authority. b) After a long day at work, the day-labourer slouched down on the sofa with a cold beer. c) He was going through a tough time in his life and he would often sag into a deep depression, slumped over with an expressionless face.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Taking on a relaxed position and postures when around others, such as slumping in your chair can be a way to increase your status. However, slouching independent of other dominant cues indicates submission – sometimes extreme submission to the world at large, especially when it is persistent across context. Slouching shows others that life gets us down and we have trouble coping with the difficulties it presents us. Slouching shows others an overall withdrawal.

Children often use slouching and pouting to show that they are upset and disappointed. Slouching also presents when people are bored or disinterested. People will be found slouching or sitting low in their seats perhaps awkwardly.

We should be careful about reading emotionally into slouching, because sometimes it just means someone is taking a break or is exhausted.

Cue Cluster: When slouching has emotional meaning, it is usually accompanied by fidgeting, putting hands in pockets, crossing arms, wringing the hands, talking with a hand hiding the mouth, and touching or scratching the face or neck without purpose, the eyes often are blank and the face is expressionless.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Boredom body language, Comfort body language, Disengagement body language, Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Low confidence body language, Negative body language, Nonthreatening body language, Readiness to submit postures.

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*No Photo, Amplifier, Arousal, Autonomic signal, Boredom body language, Energy Displacement, Escape movements, Metronomic signals, Nervous Body Language, Pacifying body language, Stressful body language, Worry body language

Body Language of Rocking The Body

by Chris • October 27, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Rocking The Body

Cue: Rocking The Body.

Synonym(s): Rocking Back and Forth, Swaying Back and Forth, Body Rocking, Body Shifting.

Description: a) A rhythmic motion of the torso from side to side or from front to back. b) The body is rocked from weight forward to weight back, from side to side usually while standing but can also be done while sitting.

In One Sentence: Rocking the body indicates emotional or body discomfort.

How To Use it: Body rocking is generally seen as a negative cue, but it can be used to signal to others that you are discomforted and wish to leave. Simply rock the body back and forth to show others that you want to leave. Rocking the body is also a way to prepare the body for action. This is useful in sports where people need to stay loose and ready for quick action such as in sprinting. Similarly, rocking is useful in keeping the blood flowing in other contexts too which can stimulate thinking.

Context: General, Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I’m rocking back and forth from side to side because I’m mentally ill (unlikely), ready to take action in a stressful event, or really need to move and burn off some of this pent up energy.” “I’m firing my engine and getting ready to take off – it’s time to wrap things up.” “I’m too cool so I’m rocking off by peeling my body away as if I’m about to leave, it’s time for you to do a little bit of the chasing.”

Variant: See Foot Kicking, Foot Fidgeting, Pacing, Blading Body Language, Body Angling or Ventral Displays, Buttress Stance or Foot Forward Leg Stance.

Cue In Action: a) Betsy was elderly and would rock constantly from side-to-side with a blank, empty expression. b) The sprinter rocked back and forth, kicked out his feet and jumped up and down readying to put in his best effort. c) You could tell the toddler needed to get outdoors after watching television for far too long, as he began to rock back and forth on the sofa. d) Danny rocked away slightly to his back foot as he needed to get to a meeting. e) After talking with a girl for some time, Danny body rocked to show that he was about to leave forcing her to do a little bit of the chasing to keep him interested.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Usually rocking signifies a negative thought and based on its intensity and persistence spells to what degree it is felt. High intensity rocking is found in the mentally ill such as those with schizophrenia, those with obsessive compulsive disorder, or hyperactivity disorder. Low grade rocking can be found in toddlers (and others) who are bored or who don’t get enough physical activity in efforts to release some of their pent up energy.

Rocking also indicates nervousness and can be found in people preparing for sporting events such as sprinting, or taking the stage such for a presentation, or even while waiting to engage in a stressful event such as a school test. In this case, rocking is a substitute for pacing and burning off positive energy in a controlled fashion in order to prepare for the constructive action that is to follow. Rocking can also mean that someone is agitated or upset and is ready to take action or self sooth so they can inhibit themselves from lashing out.

Body rocking is also a technique used to show a desire to leave a conversation. It is a body language expression done by design to show others that one must be someplace else in order to appear more important. It is meant to indicate a nonverbal “time constraint” and has been presented in a dating context to raise status in the eyes of women.

It is the associated clues coupled with the context that will determine the accurate message.

Cue Cluster: Watch for context over associated clue clusters to decipher the true meaning of body rocking. An empty, expressionless face in the elderly might indicate mental illness. Waiting outside a lecture room for an examination indicates nervous rocking while a toddler that rocks while watching television is almost a sure indication that he needs exercise. It is used in accompaniment with eye aversion, head lowered, reduced gestures, body angled away and toes pointed toward an exit, all of which signifies a desire to leave.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Arousal, Autonomic signal, Boredom body language, Energy Displacement, Escape movements, Impatience, Intention movements, intension postures or intension cues, Metronomic signals, Nervous body language, Pacifying body language, Stressful body language, Worry body language.

Resources:

Broth, Mathias and Lorenza Mondada. Walking Away: The Embodied Achievement of Activity Closings in Mobile Interaction. Journal of Pragmatics. 2013. 47: 41-58.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/nonverbally-negotiate-conversation-walking-away/

Blakeslee, Sandra (1995). “In Brain’s Early Growth, Timetable Maybe Crucial.” In New York Times (“Science Times,” August 29), pp. C1, C3.

Dube, Ashlynn ; Marjanne Kameka ; Stacy M. Lopresti-Goodman. Stereotypical Behaviors in Chimpanzees Rescued from the African Bushmeat and Pet Trade. Behavioral Sciences. 2012. 3(1): 1-20.

Leete, Esso. How I Perceive and Manage My Illness. Schizophrenia Bulletin. 1989. 15(2): 197-200.

Mason, G.J. Stereotypies and suffering. Behavioural Processes. 1991. 25(2): 103-115.

Mendez, Mario F. ; Mirea, Adrian. Adult head-banging and stereotypic movement disorders. Movement Disorders. 1998. 13(5): 825-828.

Perkins, M. ; Wolkind, S. N. Asperger’s syndrome: who is being abused? Archives of Disease in Childhood. 1991. 66(6): 693(3)

Wolff, Sula. Childhood autism: its diagnosis, nature, and treatment. Archives of Disease in Childhood. 1991. 66(6): 737(5).

Boredom body language, Displacement behaviour, Pacifying body language, Security blankets, Stressful body language

Body Language of Playing With Objects

by Chris • October 27, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Playing With Objects

Cue: Playing With Objects

Synonym(s): Giggling Change, Opening And Closing Glasses, Running Fingers Over Zippers, Running The Hands Over Stubble, Playing With Keys, Rolling A Ring Around The Finger, Object Play.

Description: Playing with objects such as a set of keys, ring, change, zippers, or any other artifact that is easy and conveniently located.

In One Sentence: Playing with objects is a way to pacify.

How To Use it: Playing with objects can give others a negative impression of you, however, it does serve a useful purpose. It provides busy hands with an outlet to release emotional tension or placate boredom. A set of keys in a pocket can be manipulated to give the hands something to do while releasing stress relieving hormones through tactile stimulation.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m uneasy, insecure, bored, and need to pacify myself by keeping my hands busy.”

Variant: See Masked Arm Cross, Fondling A Cylindrical Object, Covering The Neck Dimple or Hand to Lower Neck.

Cue In Action: a) The widower played with his wristwatch. It provided him a sense of comfort during stressful events. b) While waiting for the bus, he rolled his ring around his finger due to sheer boredom. c) When she couldn’t think of the answer on the test she twisted the eraser back and forth trying to squeeze the answer out of her mind. d) She always felt awkward on the subway and made a habit of placing her handbag on her lap. When someone she didn’t approve of sat near her, she opened her purse and sorted through her belongings to displace her negative feelings.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Playing with objects is a sign that the body needs to be pacified and is suffering from inner turmoil and discomfort or outright boredom. Most are rooted in infantile actions such as playing with a favourite toy, hugging a blanket, sucking a soother and being comforted by mom or dad. The object keeps the hands busy and helps pacify by burning up some of the excess negative energy. Playing with objects creates a soothing touch over the fingers or palms helping to release positive hormones further reinforcing the behaviour.

If the object belongs to another person, it might signal the desire to be with them and in effort to reestablish closeness. If a loved one has passed away, they may stroke a necklace given to them by this person. This too is a signal that insecurity is taking place and they are seeking their affiliation to the person for support.

Many different forms of object play exist. A person might jiggle change in their pocket, play with a pen or jewelry, open and close the arms of glasses, adjust clothing, shaking a shoe, smoking, or running fingers through the hair.

Cue Cluster: The context, more so than other cues will decide the true meaning of playing with objects.

Body Language Category: Boredom body language, Displacement behaviour, Pacifying body language, Security blankets, Stressful body language.

Resources:

Argo, J. J., Dahl, D. W., & Morales, A. C. (2006). Consumer contamination: How consumers react to products touched by others. Journal of Marketing, 70(April), 81–94.

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Claus, B., & Warlop, L. (2010). Once bitten, twice shy: Attitudes towards humans spill over to anthropomorphizable products. Jacksonville, FL: Association for Consumer Research.

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Arrogance or arrogant body language, Boredom body language, Disengagement body language, Escape movements, Eye Language, Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Intention movements, Pensive displays, Rejection body language, Stressful body language, Submissive body language

Body Language of Looking Away

by Chris • October 24, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Looking Away

Cue: Looking Away

Synonym(s): Not Maintaining Eye Contact, Roaming Eyes.

Description: When the eyes roam around a room during a conversation or when eye contact would normally be expected to persist.

In One Sentence: Looking away is a sign of concentration, disinterest, submission, or shyness.

How To Use it: Research has shown that looking at someone while they speak makes it far more difficult to concentrate that looking away. Therefore, break eye contact when trying to process complex ideas. When kids look away, also respect their decision as they may be doing so to better process your ideas, than your facial expressions.

In dating, looking away can signal shyness or intimidation. Understanding this can save negative feelings. Women can use looking away to signal their sexual interest in men as it signals coyness. This is especially powerful when eye contact is broken by looking down rather than looking left or right (signals scanning). Men can also indicate interest by shying away from eye contact, however, it is not as constructive when used by men, as women do not usually find submissive men as alluring.

Finally, use looking away as a signal of respect. Research shows that dominant people are more free to make and hold eye contact, especially persistent eye contact. To show your boss that you are willing to follow his lead, break eye contact more often and first. This signal will score points as it indicates a desire to please.

Context: a) General b) Business c) Dating.

Verbal Translation: a) b) “I’m thinking about something and need to concentrate which is why I’m not taking in any more visual cues from you at this time.” a) b) c) “I’m disinterested in what you are saying and trying to find an escape route or something more interesting to look at.” c) “I’m intimidated by your dominance, intimidated by your beauty, or repulsed by you. This is why I can’t keep my eyes on you.”

Variant: See Eye Aversion, Gaze Avoidance and Wandering Eyes, Staring or The Evil Eye.

Cue In Action: a) He frequently broke eye contact to check his watch or the contents of his brief case as the topic of conversation did not excite him. b) While discussing the fine details of the proposal, the junior associate frequently looked away or down to process and contemplate the information.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Not maintaining eye contact is a signal of comfort when done within context as it shows that a person is lacking fear. It frequently shows disrespect, especially during a conversation, as it indicates an aloof attitude. Eyes that look away can be contemplating or processing complex information or seeking escape routes due to boredom. Eyes can also look away because they wish to submit which is more usual for a woman to do when in the presence of a man or when a child is faced with a power authority. Eyes look away when they are repulsed or intimidated by beauty.

Eyes that look away can also be due to fear of aggression such as when faced with a domineering confrontation. A subordinate individual will often make less eye contact than a more dominant one. This indicates a desire to submit.

Eye language is important as it is often more indicative of intent than other body language. Good eye contact significantly improves the chances of making a sale during business, but at worst, helps convey better meaning and understanding.

The most effective use of eye contact is in fleeting glances, which at first might seem counterintuitive. However, prolonged eye contact is seen as rude, untrustworthy, threatening or even aggressive. When eye contact is piercing in a client, it usually means that a sale is being resisted. This is viewed as, “staring you down,” and shows a desire to find flaws in the sales pitch.

Poor eye contact or prolonged periods of looking away means the reverse; indifference or outright disinterest. This is why brief glances followed by looking away, or at the material at hand, is most appropriate in a sale, and when done by a client, the best indication that a sales call is being well received.

Cue Cluster: This particular eye language is dynamic. When someone submits they will avert eyes coupled with closing up their bodies from attack with head lowered, shoulders turned in and taking on a smaller profile. When someone is repulsed or disinterested, eyes will avert coupled with picking lint, checking the contents of bags, reduced agreement indicators, eye rolling, and so forth. Watch for courtship cues to measure interest when eye contact is absent. Coy looks, blushing, grooming postures, head tilt, coupled with averted eyes and cast upward to show sexual interest.

Body Language Category: Arrogance or arrogant body language, Boredom, Disengagement, Escape movements, Eye Language, Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Intention movements, Pensive displays, Rejection body language, Stressful body language, Submissive body language.

Resources:

Argyle, Michael; Lefebvre, Luc; Cook, Mark 1974. The meaning of five patterns of gaze. European Journal of Social Psychology. 4(2): 125-136.

Argyle, M., and Ingham, R. 1972. Gaze, mutual gaze, and proximity. Semiotica, 1, 32–49.

Argyle, M. and Cook, M. Gaze and Mutual Gaze. London: Cambridge University Press, 1976.

Allan Mazur; Eugene Rosa; Mark Faupel; Joshua Heller; Russell Leen; Blake Thurman. Physiological Aspects of Communication Via Mutual Gaze. The American Journal of Sociology. 1980; 86(1): 50-74.

Bania, Amanda E. ; Stromberg, Erin E. Call, Joseph (editor). The Effect of Body Orientation on Judgments of Human Visual Attention in Western Lowland Gorillas.
Journal of Comparative Psychology. 2013. 127(1): 82-90.

Belhiah, Hassan. Tutoring as an embodied activity: How speech, gaze and body orientation are coordinated to conduct ESL tutorial business. Journal of Pragmatics. 2009. 41(4): 829-841.

Breed, G., Christiansen, E., & Larson, D. 1972. Effect of lecturer’s gaze direction upon
teaching effectiveness. Catalog of Selected Documents in Psychology, 2: 115.

Ellsworth, Phoebe; Carlsmith, J Merrill. 1973. Eye contact and gaze aversion in an aggressive encounter. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 28(2): 280-292.

Einav, Shiri ; Hood, Bruce M. García Coll, Cynthia (editor). Tell-Tale Eyes: Children’s Attribution of Gaze Aversion as a Lying Cue. Developmental Psychology. 2008. 44(6): 1655-1667.

Friesen, C.K., & Kingstone, A. (1998). The eyes have it: Reflexive orienting is triggered by nonpredictive gaze. Psychonomic Bulletin and Review, 5, 490–493.

Foddy, Margaret 1978. Patterns of Gaze in Cooperative and Competitive Negotiation
Human Relations. 31(11):925-938.

Hietanen, J. K. (1999). Does your gaze direction and head orientation shift my visual attention? Neuroreport, 10, 3443–3447.

Harrigan J. and Rosenthal R. Physicians’ head and body positions as determinants of perceived rapport. J. appl. Sot. Psychol. 13, 496, 1983.