Body Language of Eye Aversion, Gaze Avoidance and Wandering Eyes
Cue: Eye Aversion and Wandering Eyes
Synonym(s): Eye Avoidance, Eye Withdrawal, Gaze Avoidance, Averting Eyes, Roving Eyes.
Description: When eyes avoid making contact with other eyes on purpose.
In One Sentence: Avoiding eye contact signals that a person wants to avoid being called upon or that they want to create an air of superiority.
How To Use it: Eye contact can be powerful especially when it is avoided. You can show your disdain for someone by simply ignoring their presence on purpose. Likewise, avoiding eye contact can have the effect of making you disappear as well. For example, if you want to avoid being called upon by the teacher or your boss, simply avert your eyes. This tells them that you’re not prepared to interact with them and nonverbally suggests that they move along and pick on someone else.
In a dating context, women should avoid eye contact with potential suitors they do not find agreeable. Even a small amount of eye contact can be seen to be an invitation to solicit especially when combined with a smile. Thus, if possible, keep eyes only for the types of men you wish would approach. This isn’t to say, however, that women should be unfriendly, but women should realize that with friendliness, comes the responsibility of having to acknowledge and interact. If you (accidentally) make eye contact, follow through with a polite verbal decline. Here is an example: “Hi, I’m sorry, I have to leave, I’m supposed to meet with someone.”
Context: General.
Verbal Translation: a) “I don’t want to cause any more problems for myself so I’m going to avoid making eye contact with other more dominant people so I don’t draw attention and provoke people into attacking.” b) “I’m superior to you and so I’m withdrawing my eye contact and affection, and pretending you are an object not worthy of my attention or acknowledgment.”
Variant: Many other variants in eye language exist. See Eye Language category.
Cue In Action: a) The pupil didn’t want to draw any more attention to himself after throwing the paper air plane so he ducked his head down and averted his eyes in shame. His teacher knew that he was embarrassed for what he had done so she went easier on him. b) They went to bed angry at each other and instead of talking it out the next morning; they avoided each other – pretending that they didn’t exist. c) The seducer had eyes for her, but she wasn’t game. Instead of acknowledging him, she chose to avert her eyes by looking at the ground instead.
Meaning and/or Motivation: The general meaning of eyes avoiding is to show submission or discomfort. Averting the eyes has two primary purposes. One is to avoid conflict and other to power play. Eye avoidance might mean defensiveness, submission, defeat, or negative feelings. It may be done to tease and allure.
People who avert their eyes might also do so because of uncomfortable feelings such as sadness, shame or embarrassment.
Eye aversion is used to prevent others from resorting to an attack response and prevents others from seeing us as a threat. Subordinates commonly avoid eye contact with dominant individuals to indicate submission and respect. Eyes might wander to avoid being reprimanded. Eyes that avoid can serve to “flee” from an encounter, a protective response, as a person subconsciously tries to make distance between himself and his aggressor.
This is the case even if an argument is minor – the eyes will withdraw first showing that a person does not wish to pursue the debate. Eyes can also avoid eye contact thus demonstrating submission. For example, a pupil will look away from his teacher to avoid reprimand. As such, avoidant eyes can be used to reduce conflict, and at the same time, search for possible escape routes to vacate the threat.
Alternatively, eyes can show other people that they aren’t worthy of being acknowledged. We see this when people act passive aggressive. They will avoid eye contact with another person at all costs. When women walk down the street, they will purposely avoid eye contact with men so as to avoid initiating conversation, and their nonverbal message says “I don’t see you as a person worthy of my gaze, so don’t bother me.”
Other times eye contact withdrawal is a way to tease and play such as the peek-a-boo game where the absence of eye contact is part of the allure and so is a signal of interest.
Cue Cluster: When eye aversion is linked to negative thoughts it will be coupled with head dropping, shoulders turned inward and down, cowering, slouching, arm withdrawal and other protective and shrinking body language
During a power play we will see signs of both dominance and apathy. For example, a person might ignore personal space by brushing up against the other person or bumping into them, orient their bodies away, talk over or around them. Likewise, they may purposely show affection to someone else thereby creating discomfort in another.
Body Language Category: Appease, Arrogance or arrogant body language, Anger, Authoritative body language, Body size reduction, Courtship displays, Closed body language, Defensive, Disengagement, Dislike (nonverbal), Distancing or moving away, Embarrassment (nonverbal), Escape movements, Eye Language, Fearful body language, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Nervous body language, Negative body language, Nonthreatening body language, Power play, Rejection body language, Readiness to submit postures, Shy nonverbal, Submissive body language.
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