Category: Clenching and gripping

Body Language Of Self-Hugging or The Double Arm Hug

Body Language Of Self-Hugging or The Double Arm Hug

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Self Hugging or The Double Arm Hug 1 BodyLanguageProjectCom - Self Hugging or The Double Arm Hug 3Cue: Self-Hugging or The Double Arm Hug.

Synonym(s): Self-Administered Hug, Double Arm Hug, Hugging The Self.

Description: Self-hugging can be done by grabbing both arms across the body, in extreme cases to each shoulder, or by clasping one arm onto the arm, elbow or shoulder on the opposite side (Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross). At times, the hands will pacify by rubbing the shoulders.

In One Sentence: Self hugging is a cue signaling the desire to be comforted.

How To Use it: Self hugging replaces the need for the comfort of another. Thus, it is to be used when one does not wish to rely on the care of others, but when one still wishes to receive a caring touch. The cue is generally perceived in a negative light so should be used only in instances when one is not concerned with appearing vulnerable. Self-hugging in a business meeting, for example, is ill advised. However, hugging the self is perfectly acceptable in the privacy of your own home, or when surrounded by close friends or family where we are generally permitted to show our softer side.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m awkward and self conscious so I’m wrapping myself up in a self embrace to provide comfort and care as my parents provided to me in my youth.”

Variant: See Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross, Fetal Position (The), Self-Stroking or Auto Contact, Hand Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind Back.

Cue In Action: It was the first time away from her parents at camp and most of the other girls were getting along fine and seemed to know each other from last year. Autumn was left by herself in line and looked awkwardly at the others while wrapping her arms around herself in a self hug. She was reminded of the care she got from her parents.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Hugging one’s self is both defensive and a closed body position. People who hold this posture exclaim that they are cold, but in reality, the cold sensation stems from feeling awkward, timid, self conscious, or distress. Self-hugs, done in this way, remind us of the care and comfort we received from mom and dad, and when found in adulthood, indicate a need for reassurance.

In adulthood, self-hugging is found when we’re insecure, self-conscious, afraid or defensive, generally. Because it’s generally not appropriate to show vulnerability to others and seek support from other’s we instead hug ourselves discreetly. The astute body language reader will notice this signal and step in to help make the carrier of the signal feel better.

Cue Cluster: Watch for submissive cues to accompany the self-hug such as head lowered or bowed, eyes up-cast, shoulders hunched over and toes pointed inward.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Appease, Barriers, Body cross, Body size reduction, Blocking or Shielding, Comfort body language, Clenching and gripping, Closed body language, Defensive body language, Emotional body language, Low confidence body language, Nervous body language, Pseudo-infantile gestures, Pacifying body language, Protective reflexes, Submissive body language.

Resources:

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Body Language of Self-Harm

Body Language of Self-Harm

No picCue: Self-Harm.

Synonym(s): Pinching The Skin, Squeezing Pimples, Scratching The Skin, Cracking Knuckles, Plucking Hair, Hair Pulling (self), Pulling At The Skin, Cracking Knuckles.

Description: A particularly aggressive scratch, pinch, or clawing at the body during emotional stress.

In One Sentence: Self harm is a sign of emotional stress.

How To Use it: While self harming can produce feelings of control and emotional release, it only masks underlying emotional issues. If you are a self-harmer, find someone you trust and work through your problems in a more constructive way.

Even mild self harming such as self-pinching, jaw clenching, body gripping and wringing, and so forth, are not positive signals. By identifying these patterns and discover the cause it will help move you in a more constructive direction.

Simply eliminating the body language can, at times, and in mid cases, reduce negative emotions by eliminating the outer symptoms, however, they will not deal with the true root. Talk to someone you trust if you are a habitual self-harmer. Build the courage to vocalize the real issue.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m losing control of the situation and my emotions, and am using self pain to re-establish my ability to influence things that are happening to me.”

Variant: Self-harm can take many forms, but all forms are motivated by the need to control the source of emotional pain by taking it in one’s own hands. A person might pinch the skin, scratch the skin, squeeze pimples, crack the knuckles, pluck or pull hair and so forth. See Hand Clenching or Fist Clenching.

Cue In Action: a) As the teenager suffered, she cut herself on the wrist and abdomen. While it didn’t resolve her underlying emotional issues, it provided a way that she could control the pain she was experiencing. b) The stress caused him to pick and pull at his pimples. c) Running the fingers through her knotted hair felt nice as she dealt with the loss of her grandmother. d) He plucked nose hair while thinking of how his boss had refused a raise.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Self-harm is linked to clenching and gripping body language as both are ways people show that they harbour negative feelings and emotions. Pinching the skin, scratching and pulling are ways a person regains control over the root of their pain. When a person self-harms, they are showing others that they are insecure, have negative feelings, low self-esteem, or are in immediate distress.

We should be particularly attuned to self harm that happens suddenly as this can predict a change in emotional state. Also carefully watch for the amplitude, frequency and force behind the self harm to monitor the underlying emotional state.

Clenching and gripping can have many other forms as well, including clenching the jaws tight or even talking through the teeth, cracking knuckles, pulling the hair or even plucking it, pinching one’s self, and clenching the fists by turning them into a ball.

In my observations of other people, I have noticed some peculiar emotional behaviour that includes the grotesque such as squeezing pimples to plucking nose hairs to more damaging and extreme behaviours such as hitting the head and scratching called “self harm” but can include any other painful and repetitive behaviours serving to sooth emotional stress.

Cue Cluster: Watch for multiple cues of self-harm. We often see fidgeting, pacing, blushing or blanching, tug at their skin such as their ears, nose or hair.

Body Language Category: Auto contact or self touching, Aggressive body language, Clenching and gripping, Emotional body language, Energy Displacement, Hostile body language, Idiosyncratic body language, Low confidence body language, Negative body language, Stressful body language, Worry body language.

Resources:

Arsenio, W. F., Cooperman, S., & Lover, A. Affective Predictors of Preschooler’s Aggression and Peer Acceptance: Direct and Indirect Effects. Developmental Psychology. 2000. 36: 438-448.

Breau, Lynn M. ; Camfield, Carol S. ; Symons, Frank J. ; Bodfish, James W. ; MacKay, Alison ; Finley, G.Allen ; McGrath, Patrick J. Relation between pain and self-injurious behavior in nonverbal children with severe cognitive impairments. The Journal of Pediatrics. 2003 142(5): 498-503.

Croyle, Kristin L. ; Waltz, Jennifer. Subclinical Self-Harm: Range of Behaviors, Extent, and Associated Characteristics. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry. 2007. 77(2): 332-342.

De Jonghe-Rouleau, Adrienne P ; Pot, Anne Margriet ; De Jonghe, Jos F M. Self-injurious behaviour in nursing home residents with dementia. International journal of geriatric psychiatry. 2005. 20(7): 651-657.

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Huflejt-Łukasik M, Czarnota-Bojarska J (2006) Short Communication: Selffocused attention and self-monitoring influence on health and coping with stress. Stress Health 22: 153–59.

Harriss, Louise ; Hawton, Keith. Deliberate self-harm in rural and urban regions: A comparative study of prevalence and patient characteristics. Social Science & Medicine. 2011. 73(2): 274-281.

Jaquier, Véronique ; Hellmuth, Julianne C. ; Sullivan, Tami P.. Posttraumatic stress and depression symptoms as correlates of deliberate self-harm among community women experiencing intimate partnerviolence. Psychiatry Research. 2013. 206(1): 37-42.

Jacobson, Colleenm. ; Muehlenkamp, Jenniferj. ; Miller, Alecl. ; Turner, J. Blake. Psychiatric Impairment Among Adolescents Engaging in Different Types of Deliberate Self-Harm. Journal of Clinical Child & Adolescent Psychology. 2008. 37(2): 363-375.

Johnson, Bret K. ; Kenkel, Mary Beth. Stress, coping, and adjustment in female adolescent incest victims. Child Abuse & Neglect. 1991. 15(3): 293-305.

Katza, Carmit; Irit Hershkowitz; Lindsay C. Malloya; Michael E. Lamba; Armita Atabakia and Sabine Spindlera. Non-Verbal Behavior of Children Who Disclose or do not Disclose Child Abuse in Investigative Interviews. Child Abuse & Neglect. 2012. 36: 12-20.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/reading-nonverbal-behaviour-child-abuse-cases-encourage-children-divulge-information-truth-telling

Laye – Gindhu, Aviva ; Schonert – Reichl, Kimberly A.. Nonsuicidal Self-Harm among Community Adolescents: Understanding the “Whats” and “Whys” of Self-Harm. Journal of Youth and Adolescence. 2005. 34(5): 447-457.

Mohiyeddini, Changiz ; Semple, Stuart. Displacement behaviour regulates the experience of stress in men. Stress. 2013. 16(2): 163-171.

Mohiyeddini, C., Bauer, S., & Semple, S. (2013a). Displacement behaviour is associated with reduced stress levels among men but not women. PLoS One, 8, e56355.

Mohiyeddini, C., Bauer, S., & Semple, S. (2013b). Public self-consciousness moderates the link between displacement behaviour and experience of stress in women. Stress, 16, 384–392.

Nolen-Hoeksema S, Aldao A (2011) Gender and age differences in emotion regulation strategies and their relationship to depressive symptoms. Personal Indiv Diff 51: 704–8.

Navarro, Joe. 2008. What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Speed-Reading People. William Morrow Paperbacks.

Nock, Matthew K. Actions speak louder than words: An elaborated theoretical model of the social functions of self-injury and other harmful behaviors. Applied and Preventive Psychology. 2008. 12(4): 159-168.

Ross, Shana ; Heath, Nancy. A Study of the Frequency of Self-Mutilation in a Community Sample of Adolescents. Journal of Youth and Adolescence. 2002. 31(1):.67-77.

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Straker, Gillian. Signing with a Scar: Understanding Self-Harm. Psychoanalytic Dialogues. 2006. 16(1): 93-112

Tamres L, Janicki D, Helgeson VS (2002) Sex differences in coping behaviour: a meta-analytic review. Personal Soc Psychol Rev 6: 2–30.

Troisi A (2002) Displacement activities as a behavioural measure of stress in nonhuman primates and human subjects. Stress 5: 47–54.

Troisi A (1999) Ethological research in clinical psychiatry: the study of nonverbal behaviour during interviews. Neurosci Biobehav Rev 23: 905–913.

Troisi A, Moles A (1999) Gender differences in depression: an ethological study of nonverbal behaviour during interviews. J Psychiatr Res 33: 243–250.

Tureck, Kim ; Matson, Johnny L. ; Beighley, Jennifer S. An investigation of self-injurious behaviors in adults with severe intellectual disabilities. Research in Developmental Disabilities. 2013. 34(9): 2469-2474.

von Hippel W, von Hippel C, Conway L, Preacher KJ, Schooler JW, et al. (2005) Coping with stereotype threat: denial as an impression management strategy. J Personal Soc Psychol 89: 22–35.

Yu, Yawen ; Bardy, Benoit G ; Stoffregen, Thomas A. Influences of head and torso movement before and during affordance perception. Journal of motor behavior. 2011. 43(1): 45-54.

Body Language of Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross

Body Language of Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross 4 BodyLanguageProjectCom - Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross 1 BodyLanguageProjectCom - Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross 2 Cue: Partial Arm Cross or Incomplete Arm Cross

Synonym(s): Incomplete Arm Cross, Elbow Grab, Shoulder Grab, Hand to Elbow, Hand to Shoulder, Half-Hug.

Description: Where one arm crosses over the body to clasp the other arm or elbow. It can also happen by reaching across to grab the opposite shoulder.

In One Sentence: A partial arm cross is a sign of insecurity.

How To Use it: Use this gesture to create comfort where escape is impractical. Unlike a full arm cross which tells others that you are not ready to receive additional information, a partial arm cross can be used to tell others that you are not totally at ease. This can be used to signal to others the desire to be protected.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m feeling awkward and insecure. I need to feel protected so I’m going to reach across my body making a shield and cut off access while also feeling like mom or dad is holding me and protecting me.”

Variant: See Arm Crossing.

Cue In Action: Her mom brought her to a busy mall where they met up with friends. A particularly cute boy was also there with his family and they began to chat. Her mom was busy looking at clothing and she was left by herself. She enjoyed talking with him, but felt awkward which was evident because she grabber her elbow across her body tightly.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Reaching across the body and grabbing the opposite elbow or shoulder is mainly a female posture. While the double arm hug is a defensive postures, the partial arm cross is a subtle posture that indicates fear, timidity, shyness and lack of self confidence. Both are barrier type postures which protect the core of the body like a shield to signals to others that we don’t wish for them to come close.

The origins of the partial arm cross likely stems from the comfort felt by a child who’s hand was held or who’s shoulder was grasped by a parent when in novel situations. The posture feels natural and comfortable when in fearful situations because it provides the sensation of being hugged and protected, like having our hand held.

Women are the most common users of this posture. While men can be seen in the partial arm cross, although it is much more rare. It may have to do with trying not to appear as timid or that men simply experience the emotions far less. Men will use other postures such as the fig leaf posture or play with the cufflink or watch instead. They may also seek other displacement activities to help self sooth.

Cue Cluster: Expect to see other gestures like child-like swaying, biting the lower lip or inside of the cheek, blushing, touching the face when fingers are not crossed, shortness of breath, eyes fixated, worried or wandering to seek an exit, feet and torso pointed away.

Body Language Category: Barriers, Body cross, Blocking or Shielding, Clenching and gripping, Closed body language, Defensive body language, Embarrassment (nonverbal), Low confidence body language, Nervous body language, Shy nonverbal.

Resources:

Arsenio, W. F., Cooperman, S., & Lover, A. Affective Predictors of Preschooler’s Aggression and Peer Acceptance: Direct and Indirect Effects. Developmental Psychology. 2000. 36: 438-448.

Bohns, Vanessa K. and Scott S. Wiltermuth. It Hurts When I Do This (Or You Do That): Posture And Pain tolerance. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology. 2012. 48: 341-345.
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Body Language of Neck Rubbing (back of neck) or Holding The Back Of The Neck

Body Language of Neck Rubbing (back of neck) or Holding The Back Of The Neck

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Neck Rubbing (back of neck) or Holding The Back Of The Neck 1Cue: Neck Rubbing (back of neck) or Holding The Back Of The Neck

Synonym(s): Hand To The Back Of The Neck, Neck Hold, Pain In The Neck Posture.

Description: The hand goes to the back of the neck and is held there, either still, as if covering, massaging or scratching.

In One Sentence: Rubbing the back of the neck is a negative thought indicator.

How To Use it: Massaging the back of the neck while working to solve a problem shows others that you are having a hard time coming up with a solution, but that you are otherwise, actively thinking.

In extreme contexts, you can show your held aggression with the posture. This will tell other people to back off which will give you more space to contemplate your situation.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m wild, angry and carrying negative feelings, so I’m holding myself back, by the scruff of my neck, so I won’t speak out.”

Variant: See Collar Pull (the).

Cue In Action: His boss was furious over the TPS reports as they were improperly filled out once again – this, even after having a lengthy meeting last week to go over the procedure. He paced back and forth across the room holding the back of his neck trying to prevent himself from acting out at his employees.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The neck hold, scratch or rub is a response to negative feelings and is a restraint posture as in “holding one’s self back” as one might do to a wily cat or dog by grabbing them by the scruff of the neck. Only in this case, it is done to one’s self. Grabbing the back of the neck shows that a person doesn’t like what is being proposed so they feel it’s necessary to bottle up their thoughts so they avoid confrontation or aggression.

Touching the back of the neck is not the same as touching any other part of the neck such as the side, which can be used as a filler gesture to pause for thought, or the front which can be used to show sexual interest in a dating context.

Scratching the back of the neck, rather, is a primitive gesture, that is a response to erector pili muscles in the scruff that our body uses to make our hair stand on end. The erector pili are microscopic bands of muscle tissue that connect hair follicles to the skin. When stimulated, the muscles contract and cause the hair to turn upward and perpendicular to the skin surface, or stand on end. While the purpose of the muscles in humans is vestigial, meaning they are an evolutionary throwaway, they were once used to trap air next to the skin to help keep the body warm. Other uses are for display and competition to make the body appear larger and more threatening. You have probably seen a domestic cat put its hair up when challenged by another cat. In porcupines, the muscles contract to bring the quills up as a defense.

As a defense, and for heat retention for people, the purpose of the arrector pili is laughable at best, but our bodies still react to cold and fear, even aggression by stimulating the muscles. A cold chill down the spine and “goose bumps” or “goose pimples” is a reference to the same thing. When we reach for our scruff, we are showing an evolutionary throwaway to a time when our hair would have stood on end!

Cue Cluster: Hand to the back of the neck is usually accompanied by the head down, pacing to burn off negative energy, worried or angry facial expression, eyes wincing, narrowed, blank, or staring intently in a rage. A person might alternate between the neck hold and massaging their entire face with their palms, clenching the fists, erratic movements and gestures and so forth.

Body Language Category: Adaptors, Auto contact or self touching, Clenching and gripping, Closed body language, Disengagement, Dislike (nonverbal), Emotional body language, Frustration or frustrated body language, Negative body language, Stressful body language.

Resources:

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Body Language of Lip Chewing or Chewing The Lips

Body Language of Lip Chewing or Chewing The Lips

No picCue: Lip Chewing or Chewing The Lips

Synonym(s): Chewing The Lips, Biting The Lip, Lip Nibble, Cheek Biting, Lip-to-Lip Bite, Lip Chewing.

Description: a) The lower or upper lip is bitten. b) The lips are brought tightly together against the teeth as if the lips are biting each other in a lip-to-lip bite. It is visible as the lips come inward slightly. c) The teeth bite the insides of the cheeks or the corner of the mouth visible as the mouth is contorted sideways to bring the cheek toward the teeth. The lips may purse and also bounce up and down as if chewing food.

In One Sentence: Lip chewing is a negative thought indicator.

How To Use it: One should avoid chewing on the lips as it tells others that you are suffering from negative internal emotions. Feigning or actual negative emotions, on the other hand, can incentivize others to offer care and support. Therefore, the signal has applications as an honest gesture of suffering.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m pacifying and punishing myself due to the negative thoughts and feelings I carry around with me.”

Variant: When pacifying is necessary, people find comfort in biting other objects such as pencils, their fingernails or the stems of their glasses. They may also pull and pinch at themselves. See Lip Biting or Biting The Lip, Lip Picking.

Cue In Action: She was on antidepressant medication and seeing a shrink but even in benign social situations, she would be found fretting as she chewed the insides of her cheeks.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Sucking, plucking, picking or chewing the lips, rubbing them with a finger or thumb are all forms of auto touching. Confident individuals would never consider using this type of behaviour out of insecurity.

When someone feels anxious they habitually find an outlet via chewing. Usually this is a pencil or pen, fingers or finger nails but when nothing else is available or as a default, the lips or sides of the mouth are chewed.

This is a subconscious return to the mouthing of a breast and reminds adults of the tactile pacifier which it served in infancy. The lips often serve as outlets for anxiety because they are always readily available unlike a pencil or other soother. Lip and cheek biting can also be a form of self-restraint, though usually not if it is done persistently, but rather suddenly in response to a certain message or stimuli. Alternatively, lip chewing can signify the desire to act out aggressively where the pain is turned inward rather than expressed outwardly.

Cue Cluster: When someone is anxious, expect their bodies to reflect a desire to turn inwards such as eyes turned downward and glazed over, head down and the shoulders slump. Emotional downtime, when people escape inward while in public, is characterized by pauses in breathing, subtle chewing of the lips, or very brief eye freezes or glazing over.

Body Language Category: Anxious body language, Clenching and gripping, Depressive body language, Energy Displacement, Frustration or frustrated body language, Hostile body language, Intention movements, Leaked or involuntary body language, Low confidence body language, Masked emotions, Microgestures, Negative body language, Nervous body language, Oral displacement activities, Pseudo-infantile gestures, Pacifying body language, Stressful body language, Threat displays.

Resources:

Breau, Lynn M. ; Camfield, Carol S. ; Symons, Frank J. ; Bodfish, James W. ; MacKay, Alison ; Finley, G.Allen ; McGrath, Patrick J. Relation between pain and self-injurious behavior in nonverbal children with severe cognitive impairments. The Journal of Pediatrics. 2003 142(5): 498-503.

Croyle, Kristin L. ; Waltz, Jennifer. Subclinical Self-Harm: Range of Behaviors, Extent, and Associated Characteristics. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry. 2007. 77(2): 332-342.

Colville, G A; Mok, Q. Psychological management of two cases of self injury on the paediatric intensive care unit. Archives of Disease in Childhood. 2003. 88(4): 335.

Christenson, Gary A. ; Mackenzie, Thomas B. ; Mitchell, James E. Characteristics of 60 adult chronic hair pullers. American Journal of Psychiatry. 1991. 148(3): 365(6).

Feteih RM: Signs and Symptoms of Temporomandibular Disorders and Oral Parafunctions in Urban Saudi Arabian Adolescents: A Research Report. Head Face Med. 2006. 2: 25.

Ghanizadeh, Ahmad and Hajar Shekoohi. Prevalence of Nail Biting and its Association With Mental Health in a Community Sample of Children. BMC Research Notes. 4 (Apr. 11, 2011): p116. DOI: http://dx.doi.org/10.1186/1756-0500-4-116.
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Gavish A, Halachmi M, Winocur E, Gazit E: Oral Habits and Their Association With Signs and Symptoms of Temporomandibular Disorders in Adolescent Girls. Journal of Oral Rehabilation. 2000, 27(1): 22-32.

Ghanizadeh A: Association of Nail Biting and Psychiatric Disorders in Children and Their Parents in a Psychiatrically Referred Sample of Children. Child Adolescents
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Ghanizadeh, Ahmad. Association of nail biting and psychiatric disorders in children and their parents in a psychiatrically referred sample of children.(Research)(Clinical report). Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Mental Health. 2008. 2(13): 13.

Harriss, Louise ; Hawton, Keith. Deliberate self-harm in rural and urban regions: A comparative study of prevalence and patient characteristics. Social Science & Medicine. 2011. 73(2): 274-281.

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Jacobson, Colleenm. ; Muehlenkamp, Jenniferj. ; Miller, Alecl. ; Turner, J. Blake. Psychiatric Impairment Among Adolescents Engaging in Different Types of Deliberate Self-Harm. Journal of Clinical Child & Adolescent Psychology. 2008. 37(2): 363-375.

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Mohiyeddini, C., Bauer, S., & Semple, S. (2013b). Public self-consciousness moderates the link between displacement behaviour and experience of stress in women. Stress, 16, 384–392.

Mohiyeddini, C., & Semple, S. (2013). Displacement behaviour regulates the experience of stress in men. Stress, 16, 163–171.

Nolen-Hoeksema S, Aldao A (2011) Gender and age differences in emotion regulation strategies and their relationship to depressive symptoms. Personal Indiv Diff 51: 704–8.

Navarro, Joe. 2008. What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Speed-Reading People. William Morrow Paperbacks.

Nock, Matthew K. Actions speak louder than words: An elaborated theoretical model of the social functions of self-injury and other harmful behaviors. Applied and Preventive Psychology. 2008. 12(4): 159-168.

Pelc AW, Jaworek AK: Interdisciplinary Approach to Onychophagia. Przegl Lek. 2003. 60(11): 737-739.

Ross, Shana ; Heath, Nancy. A Study of the Frequency of Self-Mutilation in a Community Sample of Adolescents. Journal of Youth and Adolescence. 2002. 31(1):.67-77.

Seekles, Wike ; van Straten, Annemieke ; Beekman, Aartjan ; van Marwijk, Harm ; Cuijpers, Pim. Effectiveness of guided self-help for depression and anxiety disorders in primary care: A pragmatic randomized controlled trial. Psychiatry Research. 2011. 187(1): 113-120.

Straker, Gillian. Signing with a Scar: Understanding Self-Harm. Psychoanalytic Dialogues. 2006. 16(1): 93-112

Sturman, Edward D. Invluntary Subordination and Its Relation to Personality, Mood,
and Submissive Behavior. Psychological Assessment. 2011. 23(1): 262-276 DOI: 10.1037/a0021499
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/nonverbal-submission-men-women-depression-critical-examination-use-disuse-submission/

Tanaka OM, Vitral RW, Tanaka GY, Guerrero AP, Camargo ES: Nailbiting, or Onychophagia: A Special Habit. American Journal of Orthod Dentofacial Orthop. 2008. 134(2): 305-308.

Tamres L, Janicki D, Helgeson VS (2002) Sex differences in coping behaviour: a meta-analytic review. Personal Soc Psychol Rev 6: 2–30.

Troisi A (2002) Displacement activities as a behavioural measure of stress in nonhuman primates and human subjects. Stress 5: 47–54.

Troisi A (1999) Ethological research in clinical psychiatry: the study of nonverbal behaviour during interviews. Neurosci Biobehav Rev 23: 905–913.

Troisi A, Moles A (1999) Gender differences in depression: an ethological study of nonverbal behaviour during interviews. J Psychiatr Res 33: 243–250.

Tamres L, Janicki D, Helgeson VS (2002) Sex differences in coping behaviour: a meta-analytic review. Personal Soc Psychol Rev 6: 2–30.

Tureck, Kim ; Matson, Johnny L. ; Beighley, Jennifer S. An investigation of self-injurious behaviors in adults with severe intellectual disabilities. Research in Developmental Disabilities. 2013. 34(9): 2469-2474.

von Hippel W, von Hippel C, Conway L, Preacher KJ, Schooler JW, et al. (2005) Coping with stereotype threat: denial as an impression management strategy. J Personal Soc Psychol 89: 22–35.

Body Language of Lip Biting or Biting The Lip

Body Language of Lip Biting or Biting The Lip

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Lip Biting or Biting The Lip 1Cue: Lip Biting or Biting The Lip

Synonym(s): Biting The Lip.

Description: Lightly biting the top or bottom lip with the teeth suddenly and in response to a particular stimuli or habitually and chronically.

In One Sentence: Lip biting is a sign of self restraint.

How To Use it: Women in dating can use the signal to show men that they are holding back “negative” or rather, naughty, sexually thoughts. When done properly with eye contact the signal is unmistakable. To send an even more powerful message, women should cast their eyes to the rest of the man’s body as this signals a desire for more than just friendship.

You might use lip biting in regular context to signal that you are holding back your tongue. This shows nonverbal disagreement without the risk of having to actually speak out.

Avoid chronic lip biting and chewing as this will tell others that you are self harming due to insecurity or anxiety.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m biting my lip to hold myself back because I feel that if I stop biting, my lips might be free to say something I will regret.”

Variant: As the lip bite indicates that thoughts are being held back, a woman may use it in a dating context to signal that she is holding back naughty sexual thoughts. It is particularly salient when combined with eye contact or eyes dropping to his torso, genitals, or rump. See Lip Chewing or Chewing The Lips.

Cue In Action: She was biting her lip when her boyfriend bought her some really nice flowers, but ones of which she had previously experienced an allergic reaction.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Biting the mouth indicates hidden insecurity, anxiety, embarrassment, vulnerability and a lack of self confidence. It’s main cause, however, is that an idea is being held back – “by the skin of their teeth.” It’s where the saying goes “biting one’s lip” when voicing their opinion is what someone truly desires.

However, when someone bites their lip, they feel that their idea will not be well received or they don’t feel confident enough to stand up to challenges that might raise. Other times a person bites their lip because they are carrying a negative thought they don’t want to share.

When lip biting is done chronically, it can signal persistent underlying negative feelings. In this case, lip biting is in effort to calm and pacify through energy displacement and by offering them a source of control over their pain. It is a milder version of self cutting where high anxiety individuals will use knives to scare themselves because they feel their internal world is beyond their control.

Biting the lip has also been commonly associated with female sexual seduction where the lip is bitten while observing an attractive man. The roots are similar to what is mentioned above, that is, a restraint mechanism, where the woman holds herself back from acting on her sexual impulses.

Cue Cluster: Alongside lip biting expect to see eyes averted, head down, body turned away or loose trying to blend in, hands in the pockets or hidden under a table, neck scratching or holding the back of the neck in restraint.

Body Language Category: Aggressive body language, Courtship display, Clenching and gripping, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Masked emotions, Micromessaging, Nervous body language, Pacifying body language, Stressful body language, Worry body language.

Resources:

Breau, Lynn M. ; Camfield, Carol S. ; Symons, Frank J. ; Bodfish, James W. ; MacKay, Alison ; Finley, G.Allen ; McGrath, Patrick J. Relation between pain and self-injurious behavior in nonverbal children with severe cognitive impairments. The Journal of Pediatrics. 2003 142(5): 498-503.

Croyle, Kristin L. ; Waltz, Jennifer. Subclinical Self-Harm: Range of Behaviors, Extent, and Associated Characteristics. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry. 2007. 77(2): 332-342.

Colville, G A; Mok, Q. Psychological management of two cases of self injury on the paediatric intensive care unit. Archives of Disease in Childhood. 2003. 88(4): 335.

Feteih RM: Signs and Symptoms of Temporomandibular Disorders and Oral Parafunctions in Urban Saudi Arabian Adolescents: A Research Report. Head Face Med. 2006. 2: 25.

Ghanizadeh, Ahmad and Hajar Shekoohi. Prevalence of Nail Biting and its Association With Mental Health in a Community Sample of Children. BMC Research Notes. 4 (Apr. 11, 2011): p116. DOI: http://dx.doi.org/10.1186/1756-0500-4-116.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/body-language-nail-biting/

Gavish A, Halachmi M, Winocur E, Gazit E: Oral Habits and Their Association With Signs and Symptoms of Temporomandibular Disorders in Adolescent Girls. Journal of Oral Rehabilation. 2000, 27(1): 22-32.

Ghanizadeh A: Association of Nail Biting and Psychiatric Disorders in Children and Their Parents in a Psychiatrically Referred Sample of Children. Child Adolescents
Psychiatry Mental Health. 2008. 2(1):13.

Ghanizadeh, Ahmad. Association of nail biting and psychiatric disorders in children and their parents in a psychiatrically referred sample of children.(Research)(Clinical report). Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Mental Health. 2008. 2(13): 13.

Christenson, Gary A. ; Mackenzie, Thomas B. ; Mitchell, James E. Characteristics of 60 adult chronic hair pullers. American Journal of Psychiatry. 1991. 148(3): 365(6).

Garnefski N 2004) Cognitive emotion regulation strategies and depressive symptoms: differences between males and female. Personal Indiv Diff 36: 267–76.

Harriss, Louise ; Hawton, Keith. Deliberate self-harm in rural and urban regions: A comparative study of prevalence and patient characteristics. Social Science & Medicine. 2011. 73(2): 274-281.

Huflejt-Łukasik M, Czarnota-Bojarska J (2006) Short Communication: Selffocused attention and self-monitoring influence on health and coping with stress. Stress Health 22: 153–59.

Jaquier, Véronique ; Hellmuth, Julianne C. ; Sullivan, Tami P.. Posttraumatic stress and depression symptoms as correlates of deliberate self-harm among community women experiencing intimate partnerviolence. Psychiatry Research. 2013. 206(1): 37-42.

Jacobson, Colleenm. ; Muehlenkamp, Jenniferj. ; Miller, Alecl. ; Turner, J. Blake. Psychiatric Impairment Among Adolescents Engaging in Different Types of Deliberate Self-Harm. Journal of Clinical Child & Adolescent Psychology. 2008. 37(2): 363-375.

Katza, Carmit; Irit Hershkowitz; Lindsay C. Malloya; Michael E. Lamba; Armita Atabakia and Sabine Spindlera. Non-Verbal Behavior of Children Who Disclose or do not Disclose Child Abuse in Investigative Interviews. Child Abuse & Neglect. 2012. 36: 12-20.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/reading-nonverbal-behaviour-child-abuse-cases-encourage-children-divulge-information-truth-telling

Kravitz, Harvey. Lip biting in infancy. The Journal of Pediatrics. 1964. 65(1): 136-138.

Laye – Gindhu, Aviva ; Schonert – Reichl, Kimberly A.. Nonsuicidal Self-Harm among Community Adolescents: Understanding the “Whats” and “Whys” of Self-Harm. Journal of Youth and Adolescence. 2005. 34(5): 447-457.

Lyon, Lionel Sasson. A behavioral treatment of compulsive lip-biting. Journal of Behavior Therapy and Experimental Psychiatry. 1983. 14(3): 275-276.

Mohiyeddini, C., Bauer, S., & Semple, S. (2013a). Displacement behaviour is associated with reduced stress levels among men but not women. PLoS One, 8, e56355.

Mohiyeddini, C., Bauer, S., & Semple, S. (2013b). Public self-consciousness moderates the link between displacement behaviour and experience of stress in women. Stress, 16, 384–392.

Mohiyeddini, C., & Semple, S. (2013). Displacement behaviour regulates the experience of stress in men. Stress, 16, 163–171.

Moore, Monicam. Human Nonverbal Courtship Behavior—A Brief Historical Review. Journal of Sex Research. 2010 47(2-3): 171-180.

Moore, Monica. Courtship Signaling and Adolescents: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. Journal of Sex Research. 1995. 32(4): 319-328.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/girls-just-want-to-have-fun-the-origins-of-courtship-cues-in-girls-and-women/

Moore, Monica. M. Nonverbal Courtship Patterns in Women: Context and consequences. Ethology and Sociobiology. 1985. 6:237- 247.

Moore, M. M. Courtship Communication and Perception. Perceptual and Motor Skills. 2002. 94(1): 97-105. doi:10.2466/PMS.94.1.97-105.

Moore, M. M. and D. L. Butler. 1989. Predictive aspects of nonverbal courtship behavior in women. Semiotica 76(3/4): 205-215.

Moore, M. M. 2001. Flirting. In C. G. Waugh (Ed.) Let’s talk: A cognitive skills approach to interpersonal communication. Newark, Kendall-Hunt.

Nolen-Hoeksema S, Aldao A (2011) Gender and age differences in emotion regulation strategies and their relationship to depressive symptoms. Personal Indiv Diff 51: 704–8.

Nock, Matthew K. Actions speak louder than words: An elaborated theoretical model of the social functions of self-injury and other harmful behaviors. Applied and Preventive Psychology. 2008. 12(4): 159-168.

Navarro, Joe. 2008. What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Speed-Reading People. William Morrow Paperbacks.

Pelc AW, Jaworek AK: Interdisciplinary Approach to Onychophagia. Przegl Lek. 2003. 60(11): 737-739.

Ross, Shana ; Heath, Nancy. A Study of the Frequency of Self-Mutilation in a Community Sample of Adolescents. Journal of Youth and Adolescence. 2002. 31(1):.67-77.

Seekles, Wike ; van Straten, Annemieke ; Beekman, Aartjan ; van Marwijk, Harm ; Cuijpers, Pim. Effectiveness of guided self-help for depression and anxiety disorders in primary care: A pragmatic randomized controlled trial. Psychiatry Research. 2011. 187(1): 113-120.

Straker, Gillian. Signing with a Scar: Understanding Self-Harm. Psychoanalytic Dialogues. 2006. 16(1): 93-112

Sturman, Edward D. Invluntary Subordination and Its Relation to Personality, Mood,
and Submissive Behavior. Psychological Assessment. 2011. 23(1): 262-276 DOI: 10.1037/a0021499
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/nonverbal-submission-men-women-depression-critical-examination-use-disuse-submission/

Tanaka OM, Vitral RW, Tanaka GY, Guerrero AP, Camargo ES: Nailbiting, or Onychophagia: A Special Habit. American Journal of Orthod Dentofacial Orthop. 2008. 134(2): 305-308.

Tureck, Kim ; Matson, Johnny L. ; Beighley, Jennifer S. An investigation of self-injurious behaviors in adults with severe intellectual disabilities. Research in Developmental Disabilities. 2013. 34(9): 2469-2474.

Tamres L, Janicki D, Helgeson VS (2002) Sex differences in coping behaviour: a
meta-analytic review. Personal Soc Psychol Rev 6: 2–30.

Troisi A (2002) Displacement activities as a behavioural measure of stress in nonhuman primates and human subjects. Stress 5: 47–54.

Troisi A (1999) Ethological research in clinical psychiatry: the study of nonverbal
behaviour during interviews. Neurosci Biobehav Rev 23: 905–913.

Troisi A, Moles A (1999) Gender differences in depression: an ethological study
of nonverbal behaviour during interviews. J Psychiatr Res 33: 243–250.

Tamres L, Janicki D, Helgeson VS (2002) Sex differences in coping behaviour: a
meta-analytic review. Personal Soc Psychol Rev 6: 2–30.

von Hippel W, von Hippel C, Conway L, Preacher KJ, Schooler JW, et al. (2005) Coping with stereotype threat: denial as an impression management strategy. J Personal Soc Psychol 89: 22–35.

Body Language of Jaw Clenching or Jaw Tightening

Body Language of Jaw Clenching or Jaw Tightening

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Jaw Clenching or Jaw Tightening 1Cue: Jaw Clenching or Jaw Tightening

Synonym(s): Clenched Jaw, Teeth clenching, Teeth Grinding, Talking Through The Teeth, Lip Occlusion.

Description: The jaws appear to be tightly compressed and the teeth can even be ground together back and forth. Sometime the muscles connected to the temple can be seen flexing.

In One Sentence: Jaw clenching is a signal of an internal struggle.

How To Use it: Flexing the jaw muscles can produce a bulge in the side of the mouth which can signal to others your mounting frustration. You might consider using this signal as a way to have others take your aggression more seriously or as a warning that you are about to lose your cool. Often, demonstrations of aggression lead others to submit and placate. This can work in your favour.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m angry or frustrated and I want to speak out, but feel that it’s inappropriate so my teeth are clenching down to bottle myself up and prevent me from saying something I might regret.”

Variant: Sometimes the jaw is held open where muscles both work to keep the jaw open yet clenched at the same time. This causes pain at the edges of the jaw which people register as stress. See Hand Clenching or Fist Clenching.

Cue In Action: a) He put his hand out to shake hands, as they hadn’t seen each other for some time. At the conclusion of the handshake, he clenched his jaw and said “It’s nice to have you back.” Obviously, he felt quite differently. b) She wasn’t impressed. She clenched her teeth and talked thought them. Right away, he knew she was to be avoided, especially until she had time to calm down.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The jaw clenching gesture might be a throwback to a primitive desire to bite someone else. Teeth clenching is a nonverbal signal that indicates hidden or inward-directed grief, stress, fear, tension, anxiety, anger, frustration, or that aggression is being suppressed. Other times, clenching is due to intense physical strain or in anticipation of pain.

Clenching and gripping are ways of signaling that a negative thought or emotion is being held back. In this case, it is a person holding their negative thoughts back from spilling out their mouths.

Many people are fitted with retainers and mouth guards to protect their teeth as they are habitual teeth clenchers and grinders during the night. This is thought to be because of a high stress lifestyle or occupation. Some even develop pain in the muscles surrounding the jaw. When jaw clenching happens during the day, it is a sign that a person is not well and wishes to speak out, but feels like they can’t so they bottle it up. Other times, stress boils high and someone will even speak through their teeth.

Cue Cluster: Be aware of microexpressions such as snarls of the nose, eyes darting, fists slightly clenched or the fingers beginning to curl, mouth pulled to the side, tight-lipped smile, eyes rolling. As the cue is subtle, it indicates that someone is unlikely to want to be overt with their distain.

Body Language Category: Aggressive body language, Anger body language, Clenching and gripping, Closed body language, Closed facial gestures, Dislike (nonverbal), Emotional body language, Frustration or frustrated body language, Hostile body language, Microgestures, Stressful body language, Threat displays.

Resources:

Arsenio, W. F., Cooperman, S., & Lover, A. Affective Predictors of Preschooler’s Aggression and Peer Acceptance: Direct and Indirect Effects. Developmental Psychology. 2000. 36: 438-448.

App, Betsy; Catherine L. Reed and Daniel N. McIntosh. Relative Contributions Of Face And Body Configurations: Perceiving Emotional State And Motion Intention. Cognition and Emotion. 2012. 26(4): 690-698.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/facial-expressions-versus-bodily-expressions-nonverbal-communication/

Arsenio, W. F., Cooperman, S., & Lover, A. Affective Predictors of Preschooler’s Aggression and Peer Acceptance: Direct and Indirect Effects. Developmental Psychology. 2000. 36: 438-448.

American Psychiatric Association, A. P. (1994). Diagnostic and statistical manual of
mental disorders (4th ed.). Washington, DC: American Psychiatric Association.

Costa, P. T., & McCrae, R. R. (1987). Neuroticism, somatic complaints, and disease: Is
the bark worse than the bite. Journal of Personality, 55, 299–316.

Call, B., Hare, B., & Tomasello, M. (1998). Chimpanzee gaze following in an object-choice task. Animal Cognition, 1, 89–99.

Behne, T., Carpenter, M., & Tomasello, M. (2005). One-Year-Olds Comprehend The Communicative Intentions Behind Gestures In A Hiding Game. Developmental Science, 8, 492–499.

Broth, Mathias and Lorenza Mondada. Walking Away: The Embodied Achievement of Activity Closings in Mobile Interaction. Journal of Pragmatics. 2013. 47: 41-58.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/nonverbally-negotiate-conversation-walking-away/

Gräfenhaina, Maria; Tanya Behnea; Malinda Carpentera; and Michael Tomaselloa. One-Year-Olds’ Understanding Of Nonverbal Gestures Directed To A Third Person. Cognitive Development. 2009. 24: 23-33. http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/origins-nonverbal-communication-body-language-infants-study/

Gungormus, Z., & Erciyas, K. (2009). Evaluation of the relationship between anxiety
and depression and bruxism. Journal of International Medical Research, 37,
547–550.

Hatz, Jessica L. and Martin J. Bourgeois. Anger as a Cue to Truthfulness. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology. 2010. 46: 680-683.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/anger-nonverbal-cue-truth-telling/

Hubbard, J. A. Emotion expression processes in children’s peer interaction: The role of Peer Rejection, Aggression, and Gender. Child Development. 2001. 72: 1426-1438.

Hubbard, J. A., Smithmyer, C. M., Ramsden, S. R., Parker, E. H., Flanagan, K. D., Dearing, K. F., Relyea, N., & Simons, R. F. Observational, Physiological, and Self-Reported Measures of Children’s Anger: Relations to Reactive Versus Proactive
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Hung, Iris W. and Aparna A. Labroo. From Firm Muscles to Firm Willpower: Understanding the Role of Embodied Cognition in Self-Regulation. Journal of Consumer Research. 2011 37(6): 1046-1064. http://www.jstor.org/stable/10.1086/657240
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Huang, Ding-Hau; Shih-Wei Chou; Yi-Lang Chen and Wen-Ko Chiou. Frowning and Jaw Clenching Muscle Activity Reflects the Perception of Effort During Incremental Workload Cycling. Journal of Sports Science and Medicine. 2014. 13: 921-928.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/physical-strain-leads-jaw-clenching-frowning-body-language/

Johnson, Richard R. and Jasmine L. Aaron. Adults’ Beliefs Regarding Nonverbal Cues Predictive of Violence. Criminal Justice and Behavior. 2013. 40 (8): 881-894. DOI: 10.1177/0093854813475347.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/wanna-fight-nonverbal-cues-believed-indicate-violence

Kret, M. E. and B. de Gelder. When a Smile Becomes a Fist: The Perception of Facial and Bodily Expressions of Emotion in Violent Offenders. Exp Brain Res. 2013. 228: 399-410. DOI 10.1007/s00221-013-3557-6.
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Kampe, T., Edman, G., Bader, G., Tagdae, T., & Karlsson, S. (1997). Personality traits in a group of subjects with long-standing bruxing behaviour. Journal of Oral Rehabilitation, 24, 588–593.

Lavigne, G. J., Khoury, S., Abe, S., Yamaguchi, T., & Raphael, K. (2008). Bruxism
physiology and pathology: An overview for clinicians. Journal of Oral Rehabilitation, 35, 476–494.

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the general population. Chest, 119, 53–61.

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and temporomandibular disorders in a group of children with bruxing behaviour. Journal of Oral Rehabilitation, 35, 585–593.

Rosales, V. P., Ikeda, K., Hizaki, K., Naruo, T., Nozoe, S. I., & Ito, G. (2002). Emotional stress and brux-like activity of the masseter muscle in rats. European Journal of Orthodontics, 24, 107–117.

Sutin, Angelina R. ; Terracciano, Antonio ; Ferrucci, Luigi ; Costa, Paul T. Teeth grinding: Is Emotional Stability related to bruxism? Journal of Research in Personality. 2010. 44(3): 402-405.

Sell, A., Tooby, J., and Cosmides, L. Formidability and the Logic of Human Anger. Proceedings of the National Academy of Science. 2009. 106(35), 15073-78

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Body Language of Interlaced Fingers

Body Language of Interlaced Fingers

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Interlaced Fingers 5 BodyLanguageProjectCom - Interlaced Fingers 7Cue: Interlaced Fingers

Synonym(s): Entwined Fingers, Interlocking Fingers.

Description: When the fingers are interlocked or interlaced together. They are sometimes rubbed together in order to provide a pacifying effect.

In One Sentence: Interlaced fingers are an indication of frustration, hostility, self-restraint and other negative thoughts.

How To Use it: Interlaced fingers can be used to help steady nervous hands. By locking them together, it will provide security and comfort. This sign goes mostly unnoticed by others so it is unlikely that they will read your frustration, instead confusing it with self-control.

If possible, however, one should try to keep the fingers unlocked to demonstrate confidence.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “My fingers are interlaced together because I’m holding frustration, hostility and other negative thoughts. I need to entwine my fingers so I keep them under careful restrained control.”

Variant: See Hand Clasping.

Cue In Action: a) The defendant waited patiently on stand as he was cross-examined. His fingers interlaced neatly on his lap. On closer inspection, one could see his fingers moving up and down and his knuckles tightly pressed together.

b) The junior associate made sure he was obedient while the senior ranking member said his piece. He interlocked his hands on his lap and sat quietly so as not to disturb the presentation. Once the floor was opened up to the rest of the associates, the junior associate unlocked his fingers and began to gesticulate as he showed the various shortcomings in the plan.

Meaning and/or Motivation: This gesture is commonly thought as a contained and controlled posture, but this is not so. This gesture reveals frustration, hostility and that a person is harbouring negative thoughts.

When the fingers massage the palm or the fingers are interlaced then gently rub up and down as the fingers stroke the inside of the other, it indicates a person who is in doubt, has low confidence, or is experiencing stress. As tension escalates, the gesture will move from palm stroking into more rigorous interlaced finger stroking making the two a progression of intensity. Thus while palm stroking is due to mild doubt or slight confidence issues, interlaced fingers that rub up and down is to do a higher level of anxiety.

As conversations intensify watch for increases in soothing body language revealing the underlying anxiety. The gesture feels comfortable to do because it closes up the body from the outside world preventing the hands from speaking (gesturing).

If the thumbs dart up while the fingers are interlaced it can turn a timid interlaced fingers gesture into a positive cue. Thumbs-out is a representation of ego, dominance, confidence, comfort, assertiveness and sometimes even aggressiveness.

At times the fingers may become interlaced appearing as if in prayer, which might even be the case. Pressure can be so great that the fingers can even blanch as blood flow is impeded.

Cue Cluster: Watch for adjoining cues to amplify the level of stress, anxiety or discomfort. For example, compressed lips, neck scratching and fidgeting might signal a desire to interject. Thumbs up gestures while sitting back might signal dominance through a relaxed stance. There can be many motivations behind interlaced fingers and the associated cues will help the body language reader decide the true meaning.

Body Language Category: Clenching and gripping, Masked emotions, Pacifying body language.

Resources:

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Body Language of Hand Wringing

Body Language of Hand Wringing

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Hand Wringing 2Cue: Hand Wringing

Synonym(s): Wringing The Hands.

Description: The hands are clasp one inside the other and tightly clamped and twisted on each other. The hands may also be tightly cupped and squeezed one inside the other or interlaced and squeezed. It can be done so aggressively that the fingers or knuckles turn white.

In One Sentence: Wringing the hands is a sign that a person is experiencing anxiety, stress or suffering from low confidence.

How To Use it: Wringing the hands is not useful and one should avoid it when possible. While it can provide a tactile release for underlying stress, it is best to do something proactive to actually resolve the issue rather than suppress it.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m so agitated and stressed that I’m inflicting pain on myself as I would like to do to someone else, or due to stress of the situation at large. Since I’ve lost control of the situation and others, the best I can do is control the pain I do onto myself.”

Variant: This cue is similar to self pinching, pulling or even plucking the hair, or pinching one’s self as they are all forms of inflicting pain on the self. This is especially common when external pain can not be controlled.

Cue In Action: She wrung her hands as she waited for the doctor to report back with news about the surgery.

Meaning and/or Motivation: It signifies high anxiety, stress, or low confidence, and is a pacifying behaviour.

The hands are clenched because of the internal turmoil that a person feels that they cannot resolve through external factors. Pain that is inflicted on the self is pain that is controlled by the self. Therefore, self-pain is pain that is used to regain some agency over a person’s outcome – even if it is entirely unproductive.

Clenching is also a replacement for pain that someone might wish to inflict on other people whom they feel are causing their problems, and if not caused by people directly, than to the context in general.

Cue Cluster: Hand wringing is usually accompanied by gritting the teeth or jaw clenching, scratching and plucking behaviours, licking the teeth to sooth, lip biting or cheek chewing, eye squinting, snarling, amongst others.

Body Language Category: Aggressive body language, Anger, Clenching and gripping, Closed body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Emotional body language, Energy Displacement, Frustration or frustrated body language, Hostile body language, Low confidence hand displays, Nervous body language, Stressful body language, Worry body language.

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Body Language of Hand Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind Back

Body Language of Hand Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind Back

Cue: Hand Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind Back.

Synonym(s): Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind The Back, Wrist Gripping Behind Back, Arm Gripping Behind Back, Restraining The Self, Self Restraint.

Description: A posture where the arm is wrapped in behind the back to reach to wrist or upper arm.

In One Sentence: Gripping the upper arm behind the back is a nonverbal demonstration of holding one’s self back.

How To Use it: Use this upper arm grip behind the back cue when you want to show others that you are holding yourself back from acting out. As the cue reminds us of being restrained by a parent, it embodies the kind of self-restrained we might currently require. Therefore, the cue makes holding back easier since it reminds us of parental assistance. So if you feel that you may be spurred into an outburst, or that you need reassurance, reach up and grab your wrist or arm to create a more solid foundation to repress your thoughts or emotions. The cue is most useful when we fear that we may say something we might later regret or we need the security of being around a loved one due to insecurity.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “The reason I am gripping my arm or wrist behind my back is because I’m holding myself back from striking out due to my negative thoughts.”

Variant: See Arm Crossing, Hugging or The Double Arm Hug, Military Man or Regal Stance.

Cue In Action: The cop pulled her aside to speak with her about her conduct. She was so angry she was red in the face. She balled up her left hand behind her back, reached around with her right hand and clasped it rigidly preventing her from speaking or acting out on her displeasure.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The hand gripping the wrist or upper arm in behind the back sends an emotional message of frustration. It is an attempt at self-control and restraint. Therefore, it signals negative thoughts. In this case, the hand is holding the arm back preventing action from taking place due to negative emotions.

Restraint postures are part of the “freeze, flight or fight” response. When imagining this body language try picturing a toddler ready to strike at another. His mother would hold him back by the wrist or arm preventing him from doing so. This believed to the origins of the posture.

However, in adulthood, the posture is self-inflicted. We do the posture to remind us of the strength others have provided us in the past against our emotional outbursts. The posture serves to relieve tension through gripping and energy displacement. This gives us something to do to displace our negative energy.

Gripping, especially intensely, helps us feel more relaxed because the pain releases pleasure hormones and adrenaline. The same could be achieved through more constructive mechanisms like running, exercise, or constructing something useful, but like all forms of body language, the solutions come from an archaic part of the brain through evolution (or accident), so we are not interested in doing constructive work at a time when our minds are dealing with stress.

A more intense hand gripping posture happens when the arm grips higher up near the elbow or upper arm. The higher the grip, the more frustration is present and the more self-control is being expressed.

Cue Cluster: Clenching and gripping can have many other forms as well, including clenching the jaws tightly or even talking through the teeth, cracking knuckles, pulling the hair or even plucking it, pinching one’s self, and clenching the fists by turning them into a ball or wringing the hands out like a wet article of clothing.

Body Language Category: Aggressive body language, Anger, Clenching and gripping, Emotional body language, Frustration or frustrated body language, Hostile body language, Masked emotions, Negative body language.

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