Body Language of Hand Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind Back

Body Language of Hand Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind Back

Cue: Hand Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind Back.

Synonym(s): Gripping Upper Arm or Wrist Behind The Back, Wrist Gripping Behind Back, Arm Gripping Behind Back, Restraining The Self, Self Restraint.

Description: A posture where the arm is wrapped in behind the back to reach to wrist or upper arm.

In One Sentence: Gripping the upper arm behind the back is a nonverbal demonstration of holding one’s self back.

How To Use it: Use this upper arm grip behind the back cue when you want to show others that you are holding yourself back from acting out. As the cue reminds us of being restrained by a parent, it embodies the kind of self-restrained we might currently require. Therefore, the cue makes holding back easier since it reminds us of parental assistance. So if you feel that you may be spurred into an outburst, or that you need reassurance, reach up and grab your wrist or arm to create a more solid foundation to repress your thoughts or emotions. The cue is most useful when we fear that we may say something we might later regret or we need the security of being around a loved one due to insecurity.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “The reason I am gripping my arm or wrist behind my back is because I’m holding myself back from striking out due to my negative thoughts.”

Variant: See Arm Crossing, Hugging or The Double Arm Hug, Military Man or Regal Stance.

Cue In Action: The cop pulled her aside to speak with her about her conduct. She was so angry she was red in the face. She balled up her left hand behind her back, reached around with her right hand and clasped it rigidly preventing her from speaking or acting out on her displeasure.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The hand gripping the wrist or upper arm in behind the back sends an emotional message of frustration. It is an attempt at self-control and restraint. Therefore, it signals negative thoughts. In this case, the hand is holding the arm back preventing action from taking place due to negative emotions.

Restraint postures are part of the “freeze, flight or fight” response. When imagining this body language try picturing a toddler ready to strike at another. His mother would hold him back by the wrist or arm preventing him from doing so. This believed to the origins of the posture.

However, in adulthood, the posture is self-inflicted. We do the posture to remind us of the strength others have provided us in the past against our emotional outbursts. The posture serves to relieve tension through gripping and energy displacement. This gives us something to do to displace our negative energy.

Gripping, especially intensely, helps us feel more relaxed because the pain releases pleasure hormones and adrenaline. The same could be achieved through more constructive mechanisms like running, exercise, or constructing something useful, but like all forms of body language, the solutions come from an archaic part of the brain through evolution (or accident), so we are not interested in doing constructive work at a time when our minds are dealing with stress.

A more intense hand gripping posture happens when the arm grips higher up near the elbow or upper arm. The higher the grip, the more frustration is present and the more self-control is being expressed.

Cue Cluster: Clenching and gripping can have many other forms as well, including clenching the jaws tightly or even talking through the teeth, cracking knuckles, pulling the hair or even plucking it, pinching one’s self, and clenching the fists by turning them into a ball or wringing the hands out like a wet article of clothing.

Body Language Category: Aggressive body language, Anger, Clenching and gripping, Emotional body language, Frustration or frustrated body language, Hostile body language, Masked emotions, Negative body language.

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