Category: Liking

Comfort body language, Honest body language, Liking, Nonthreatening body language, Open facial gestures, Relaxed body language

Body Language of Loose Lips or Relaxed Lips

by Chris • October 24, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Loose Lips or Relaxed Lips

Cue: Loose Lips or Relaxed Lips

Synonym(s): Relaxed Lips, Full Lips, Contented Lips, Plump Lips.

Description: When the lips are not stretched, compressed or pursed, curled or even smiling, the lips are full, relaxed, might be parted or just rested and plump.

In One Sentence: Lips that are full rather than compressed signal a relaxed and positive attitude.

How To Use it: Keep the lips relaxed to show others that you lack tension. Full lips that do not stretch across the face, but rather, are plump and loose, indicate a person who is happy and healthy.

Women can benefit best by showing full lips as they are associated with youthfulness, health and fertility. Lips are known to shrink as we age, so applying lipstick can help make them seem larger. Additionally, puckering them outward is a salient demonstrating of youthfulness and fertility. Benefits come to those with desirable features.

Puckering the lips outward rather than compressing them can also be used as a kiss indicator. To cue a kiss, or perform a “kiss-request,” woman simply need to puff out their lips while simultaneously looking at the lips of the man she desires.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: a) “I’m so relaxed and content that my lips are full and not stretched or compressed because my entire body lacks tension and negative emotions.” b) “I’m happy and relaxed and feel no negative thoughts so my lips are not being stretched or compacted in any way.”

Variant: See Compressed Lips for the opposite cue.

Cue In Action: a) While reading a book, his lips parted, were full and lacked any tension. b) We knew she was relaxed when her lips fattened back up. She had been tense all day long, biting and compressing her lips as if they were being consumed.

Meaning and/or Motivation: People whose lips are loose show that they are sad, depressed or relaxed. Lacking any direct context or cue cluster, one should assume that loose lips are relaxed – the opposite to lip pursing. This nonverbal cue usually indicates true contentment but one should check for associated cues to decide with certainty.

The accompanying signals and facial expressions will decide which of the above emotions are being demonstrated. Relaxed body language is any body language that lacks muscle tension, the body is loose and the arms and legs move freely and naturally swaying with any motion. The torso may sag slightly to one side, or slump, but is not held by irregular tension. Thus, the body holds regular open body postures, with the arms and legs uncrossed. Breathing is steady and slow and can even become deep showing even more relaxation.

When the lips are loose and part, the head drops down and the eyes stare emptily it often signals contempt or disapproval in an “I can’t believe what I’m seeing.” However, in most cases, when the lips lack any tension it is due to being relaxed without negative feelings.

Cue Cluster: Expect to see an open face, palm up displays, torso oriented toward people, rather than away, legs uncrossed or if crossed then crossed toward, leaning in toward a speaker or leaning back and relaxed.

Body Language Category: Comfort body language, Liking, Honest body language, Liking, Nonthreatening body language, Open facial gestures, Relaxed body language.

Resources:

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Calvo, Manuel ; Fernández-Martín, Andrés. Can the eyes reveal a person’s emotions? Biasing role of the mouth expression. Motivation and Emotion. 2013. 37(1): 202-211.

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http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/read-kids-dislike-food-facial-expressions-accurate-detecting-dislike-not-like-children/

Amplifier, Attentive body language, Body pointing, Confident body language, Disengagement body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Distancing or moving away, Dominant body language, Escape movements, Expansive movements, Indicator of interest (IoI), Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Intention movements, Liking, Low confidence body language, Power play

Body Language of Leaning In and Leaning Out

by Chris • October 23, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Leaning In and Leaning Out

Cue: Leaning In and Leaning Out.

Synonym(s): Pecking Forward, Leaning Out.

Description: Leaning forward or away from another person (or thing).

In One Sentence: Leaning in and leaning out signal interest and disinterest respectively.

How To Use it: Use leaning in and leaning out to show your level of interest. Leaning in shows people that you are interested in them, their ideas and/or what they have to say. Leaning out sends the reverse message.

Leaning language is applicable in business, dating and amongst friends.

For example, leaning in toward your dating partner shows him or her that you wish to gain intimacy. In a business meeting or presentation sit at the edge of your seat and lean in toward the presenter to show them you are keen on the information. With friends at lunch, sit facing them and engage them with conversation by moving forward. These postures all work in reverse to show disinterest. Additionally, leaning in and out can be done while standing and send a similar message. Leaning in also shows a readiness for action. This is also a positive message – especially in business and dating.

Context: a) Dating, b) General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m interested in what you are saying and am supplicating to your dominance and ability to draw me in closer to you, rather than you, to me. That’s why I’m leaning forward.”

Variant: See Head Away.

Cue In Action: a) Dave was really into Stacey. Throughout lunch, he tried to engage her as much as possible but found the more he leaned in, the more she leaned out and away. It was clear that he was more into her, than vice versa. b) While presenting to the crowd, she found half of the students leaning in and engaged, while the other half leaned out and away. She knew which students where most keen on the topic from the way their bodies leaned.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Leaning in too much, also referred to as “pecking” forward has been advanced by the pick-up community as a term describing men who appear needy and who lack control of the dating situation rather than dominant and chase-worthy.

Pecking forward can appear in any setting and shows which of the two are most interested in the other or whom is most dominant and in control. Or, sometimes more aptly, leaning away tells us which person is more apathetic to the relationship and apathy often creates control and ability to dominate. Dominant people will tend to lean back and take up space, but someone who lacks confidence or whom has a great interest in another person will try to engage them more by leaning in toward them. This tends to have the reverse result to what is intended.

Leaning back will force others to engage you, instead of the other way around (cat and mouse game.) Talking quietly also has the affect of forcing people to move closer to you, thereby increasing your status.

Cue Cluster: Couple leaning in and leaning out with other nonverbal cues to determine level of engagement. Leaning in should find itself with eye contact, nodding, smiling, smooth flowing conversation and head tilted to the side – this shows engagement. Leaning back, and disengagement should find itself with lack of eye contact, lack of nodding, deadpan face, stuttered conversation and head-on rather than head tilted.

Body Language Category:

Leaning In: Amplifier, Attentive, Body pointing, Indicator of interest (IoI),
Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Intention movements, Low confidence body language, Liking.

Leaning Away: Amplifier, Body pointing, Confident body language, Disengagement, Dislike (nonverbal), Distancing or moving away, Dominant body language Escape movements, Expansive movements, Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Indicators of sexual disinterest (IOsD), Intention movements, Power play.

Resources:

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Courtship display, Eye Language, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Liking

Body Language of The Intimate Gaze or Triangular Gaze Pattern

by Chris • October 23, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of The Intimate Gaze or Triangular Gaze Pattern

Cue: Intimate Gaze (The) or Triangular Gaze Pattern

Synonym(s): Triangular Gaze Pattern, Seducer Gaze.

Description: If interest is mutual and conversation arises, scanning of the face will take place. The eyes will form a triangular pattern from eye-to-eye and down to the mouth or chin. The eyes will also wander briefly to other parts of the face, but the vast majority of time will be spent looking at the eyes and mouth. Gaze duration during intimacy lasts in bouts of approximately four to five seconds. When the eyes finally do leave the face they will check out the rest of the body, to examine clothing, overall build, jewelry and rings.

In One Sentence: The intimate gaze pattern indicates sexual feelings.

How To Use it: Use the intimate gaze pattern to show others that you are romantically interested in them. This is an effective signal when done by both men and women.

Context: Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I like you sexually so I’m being respectful to check out your emotional cues which are found in your eyes, face and mouth, but I’m also making visual forays to the rest of your body including your chest and privates.”

Variant: See Staring or The Evil Eye, Eye Aversion, Gaze Avoidance and Wandering Eyes, Business Gaze, Face Gaze, Friendly Social Gaze.

Cue In Action: As Bill and Debbie spoke, they followed a characteristic gaze pattern from the eyes to the mouth, but also to the rest of the body.

Meaning and/or Motivation: If the eyes of men and women meet and there is a spark, the eyes will follow specific patterns across the face to form an intimate gaze. When eye contact is broken it usually happens by looking down. Looking down punctuates sexual interest. Looking sideways is a willful indication that one is scanning the room entirely and is not checking someone else out.

Both sexes, despite social norms, will glance over more intimate areas of the body such as the crotch and breasts coupled with the intimate gaze as described above. Men tend to check women out from the ground up, starting from the legs, then to the crotch, torso, breasts, shoulders, then face. The vast majority of women find being scanned by men to be a turn-off, however, studies show that women habitually check men out just as often, they simply do it much more discretely.

Cue Cluster: Expect to see additional courtship cues such as neck and wrist exposure, batting of the eyes, touching the neck, grooming, in women, puffing out the chest, and hands on the hips, in men.

Body Language Category: Courtship display, Eye Language, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Liking.

Resources:

Argyle, Michael; Lefebvre, Luc; Cook, Mark 1974. The meaning of five patterns of gaze. European Journal of Social Psychology. 4(2): 125-136.

Argyle, M., and Ingham, R. 1972. Gaze, mutual gaze, and proximity. Semiotica, 1, 32–49.

Argyle, M. and Cook, M. Gaze and Mutual Gaze. London: Cambridge University Press, 1976.

Allan Mazur; Eugene Rosa; Mark Faupel; Joshua Heller; Russell Leen; Blake Thurman. Physiological Aspects of Communication Via Mutual Gaze. The American Journal of Sociology. 1980; 86(1): 50-74.

Breed, G., Christiansen, E., & Larson, D. 1972. Effect of lecturer’s gaze direction upon
teaching effectiveness. Catalog of Selected Documents in Psychology, 2: 115.

Ellsworth, Phoebe; Carlsmith, J Merrill. 1973. Eye contact and gaze aversion in an aggressive encounter. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 28(2): 280-292.

Foddy, Margaret 1978. Patterns of Gaze in Cooperative and Competitive Negotiation
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Hall, Jeffrey A. and Chong Xing. The Verbal and Nonverbal Correlates of the Five Flirting Styles. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 2015. 39:41–68. DOI 10.1007/s10919-014-0199-8
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/first-12-minutes-flirting-using-nonverbal-communication-study-reveals-26-body-language-cues-attraction/

Kellerman. 1989. Looking and loving: The effects of mutual gaze on feelings of romantic love. Journal of Research in Personality. 23(2): 145-161.

Kendon, A. Some Functions of Gaze Direction in Social Interaction. Acta Psychologica. 1967. 32: 1-25.

Kleinke, C. L. 1980. Interaction between gaze and legitimacy of request on compliance in a field setting. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior 5(1): 3-12.

Leeb. 2004. Here’s Looking at You, Kid! A Longitudinal Study of Perceived Gender Differences in Mutual Gaze Behavior in Young Infants Source: Sex Roles. 50(1-2): 1-14.

Langer, Julia and Rodebaugh, Thomas. Social Anxiety and Gaze Avoidance: Averting Gaze but not Anxiety. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 2013, Vol.37(6): 1110-1120.

McAndrew. 1986. Arousal seeking and the maintenance of mutual gaze in same and mixed sex dyads Source: Journal of nonverbal behavior. 10(3):168-172.

Mulac, A., Studley, L., Wiemann, J., & Bradac, J. 1987. Male/female gaze in same-sex
and mixed-sex dyads. Human Communication Research. 13: 323-343.

Natale, Michael. 1976. A Markovian model of adult gaze behavior. Journal of Psycholinguistic Research. 5(1): 53-63.

Phelps, F., Doherty-Sneddon, G., & Warnock Educational Psychology., 27, 91-107. (2006). Functional benefits of children’s gaze aversion during questioning. British Journal Developmental Psychology. 24: 577-588.

Rosenfeld, H., Breck, B., Smith, S., & Kehoe, S. 1984. Intimacy-mediators of the proximity-gaze compensation effect: Movement, conversational role, acquaintance, and gender. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 8: 235-249.

Williams. 1993. Effects of Mutual Gaze and Touch on Attraction, Mood, and Cardiovascular Reactivity Source: Journal of Research in Personality. 27(2): 170-183.

Emotional body language, Honest body language, Liking, Open body language

Body Language of Honest Smile or Duchenne Smile

by Chris • October 23, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Honest Smile or Duchenne Smile

Cue: Honest Smile or Duchenne Smile

Synonym(s): Duchenne Smile, Felt Smile, Broad Smile, Smiling Eyes

Description: This smile is called the honest smile and its giveaway is the appearance of crow’s feet at the corner of the eyes. The orbicularis oculi muscles surround the eyes contract when happy emotions are present. The zygomatic muscles, around the mouth, on the other hand, are consciously controlled and can be a giveaway to a false smile, as does the presences of asymmetry.

In One Sentence: The Duchenne is an honestly felt smile indicating true happiness.

How To Use it: Research has found that with practice many people can actually replicate the characteristics of the “true smile” to fool casual observers. Honest smiles should be the default smile as it will create the most warmth and trust in others.

The exception of course, is when one does not wish to welcome people closer. A polite smile is better suited for such occasions.

Should a woman wish to repel men in a dating context, an honest smile would be counterproductive. A polite smile can be used in its stead and tell him nonverbally, that, while the offer is appreciated, no mutual feelings exist.

To perform the Duchenne smile, be sure to flex the muscles surrounding the eye to produce crow’s feet. Practice this in the mirror.

Context: General

Verbal Translation: “I’m so overjoyed that my eyes are lighting up with happiness – it’s as if my eyes are smiling.”

Variant: A broad smile occurs when the teeth are made visible. See Smiling, Fear Smile, Friendly Smile, Frown (the) or Downturned Smile, Honest Smile or Duchenne Smile, Jaw Drop Smile, Nervous Smile, Polite Smile (the), Uneven Smile Or Lopsided Smile, Upper Lip Smile, Artificial Smile or Fake Smile, Nervous Smile, Honest Smile or Duchenne Smile, Contempt Facial Expression.

Cue In Action: a) Despite holding her laugh in, her eyes crinkled into crows feet. b) Wrinkles formed at the edges of her eyes – she had smiling eyes. c) The con artist gave himself away. When he smiled, his jaw dropped, but no wrinkles formed at the edges of his eyes.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The Duchenne smile is a “true smile.” It is honest and due to true feelings of joy. The gaze is relaxed and the smile is intended to convey joy and pleasure. It is difficult to replicate these smiles without being truly amused or in good company as the muscles are usually out of our conscious control. Therefore, this is a smile that is not easily faked making it a reliable indicator.

The Duchenne Smile draws its name from the French researcher Guillaume Duchenne who used electrodiagnostics and electrical stimulation to distinguish between real and fake smiles.

Cue Cluster: Duchenne smiles will be coupled with other open and relaxed body language such as arms uncrossed, palms up and gesturing, relaxed gaze, ample gesticulation, increased proximity, orienting toward a person, and so forth.

Body Language Category: Honest body language, Open body language, Liking, Emotional body language.

Resources:

Abel, Ernest L. and Michael L. Kruger. Smile Intensity in Photographs Predicts Longevity. Psychological Science. 2010. 21(4): 542-544.
Seder, J. Patrick and Shigehiro Oishi. Intensity of Smiling in Facebook Photos Predicts Future Life Satisfaction. Social Psychological and Personality Science. 2012. 3(4): 407-413.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/facebook-smile-predicts-life-satisfaction/

Colonnesi, Cristina; Susan M. Bogels; Wieke de Vente and Mirjana Majdandzic. What Coy Smiles Say About Positive Shyness in Early Infancy. Infancy. 2013. 18(2): 202–220. ISSN: 1525-0008 print / 1532-7078 online
DOI: 10.1111/j.1532-7078.2012.00117.x
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Amplifier, Attentive body language, Body size reduction, Courtship display, Indicator of interest (IoI), Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Liking, Open body language, Undivided attention (nonverbal)

Body Language of Head Tilted or Head Cocked To The Side

by Chris • October 23, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Head Tilted or Head Cocked To The Side

Cue: Head Tilted or Head Cocked To The Side

Synonym(s): Canting The Head, Cocking The Head, Head Tilted At Forty Five Degrees, Head Cocked, Head Canting.

Description: The head tilt happens by tilting the head at forty-five degrees. It is much more commonly held by woman and children, than by men.

In One Sentence: Having the head titled to the side indicates sincere interest and curiosity.

How To Use it: Tilt the head to the side whenever you want to show someone that what they are saying fascinates you. Use this when you want the speaker to see your admiration in a nonverbal way. Men and woman can both use this to encourage each other to share more information.

Women can use the head tilt in a dating context to show men that they are submissive as the head tilt reveals the vulnerable neck. Thus, the posture, is particularly alluring.

Context: a) General b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: a) “I like what I’m hearing so I’m canting my head to the side in sincere interest and amusement.” b) “I’m trying to gain your sympathy and protectiveness so I’m appearing childlike and vulnerable so you will want to be my protector.”

Variant: Men will normally cant their heads by raising the chin slightly whereas women prefer to lower their chins coupled with the head tilted upward. It is thought that women wish to send a more childlike image with their head cant, in order to elicit a protective response in men. When men tilt their heads it usually signifies interest and recognition of others and their ideas. See Forehead Bow (The), Head On.

Cue In Action: a) The audience was totally engaged after he opened with some interesting and surprising facts about how he overcame bullying. b) She wanted to score a date with a particularly handsome and wealthy man so she really fired on the charm. She tossed her head to the side revealing her neck, cocked her head, look up at him and smiled coyly.

Meaning and/or Motivation: a) People and animals both incline their heads slightly when they are interested, attentive, or curious. You might have seen a dog twist his head to the side when puzzled by something a person has done. The head cant is a universal signal of interest and attentive listening. When women cant their heads, it depicts appeasement and submission and when men cant their heads they demonstrate recognition. Women also display their necks during their head tilt in order to appear more vulnerable and less threatening.

b) This is a submissive gesture and normally performed by women. The head tilt happens by tilting the head at forty-five degrees and delivering eye contact in a come hither type, coy, teasing, type look with plenty of neck exposure. It makes women appear more childlike and helpless, and evokes protective feelings in men. Its primary motive is to expose vulnerable parts of the body, the neck, to show submission and trust in a man’s dominance.

Cue Cluster: The head cant is normally coupled with eye contact toward the person showing interest coupled with relaxed facial expression and smiling gently.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Attentive body language, Body size reduction, Courtship display, Indicator of interest (IoI), Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Liking, Open body language, Undivided attention (nonverbal).

Resources:

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Emotional body language, Honest body language, Liking, Nonthreatening body language, Rapport or rapport building

Body Language of Hand Over The Chest

by Chris • October 22, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Hand Over The Chest

Cue: Hand Over The Chest

Synonym(s): Hand On The Heart.

Description: When the hand is clasped over the chest or heart.

In One Sentence: Holding the hand over the heart is signal that one is thinking about the best interest of others.

How To Use it: Research has shown that when people hold their hands to their hearts they are primed to make better moral judgments. When you wish to have others make an honest confession, having them swear and make oath by holding their hands over their chest, will help produce desired results.

Likewise, when you wish to show others that you are thinking about them and hold a caring attitude for them, hold your hand over your heart to pledge your moral position.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “My heart is warm and I’m thinking about you and have your best interest at heart so I’m clasping the soul of my body, my heart because I want you to really see how important you are to me.”

Variant: One or two hands might come up. When two hands come up it appears as a self hug and rocking from side to side might accompany. This shows tender love and a desire to feel comforted and secure.

Cue In Action: We might see the hand of a salesman come to his chest to show his deepest desire to sell you a valued product.

Meaning and/or Motivation: An appeal to honesty and sincerity or deep appreciation. When we show our condolences to a family member for their lose, we will bring our hand to our heart. Our hand comes to our heart when we wish to be believed and show that it is us who cares deeply about another.

Cue Cluster: Hand over the heart is usually accompanied by a titled head, wide smile, and kind eyes.

Body Language Category: Emotional body language, Honest body language, Liking, Nonthreatening body language, Rapport or rapport building.

Resources:

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Courtship display, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Liking, Ownership gesture, Preening body language

Body Language of Grooming and Preening

by Chris • October 22, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Grooming and Preening

Cue: Grooming and Preening.

Synonym(s): Preening.

Description: A gesture that aims to make the self or someone else more presentable. It includes removing lint or pet hair, fixing a tag from a shirt, smoothing clothing, adjusting a shirt collar, fixing the hair, applying makeup, checking a mirror, and so forth.

In One Sentence: Grooming other people is a way to bond and when done on the self, is a way to make yourself presentable.

How To Use it: Use grooming of yourself to show other people that you are in good health and care about how you are presented. This is important in every facet of one’s life from intimate relationships to job settings.

In dating as well as between friends and relatives, grooming is a welcome form of caring and demonstration of respect. To show people you care, remove lint, smooth clothing, adjusting a tie, notify them of stains on clothing or food on their face and so forth. Some debate exists as to whether we should risk the embarrassment by helping people self-groom, however, it is usually well received. Think of grooming as a way to help people avoid extra embarrassment. At the same time, grooming shows people that you are looking out for them.

The gesture is particularly important in a dating context since it shows the opposite sex that you really care about them. Men and women can both groom each other to show intimacy.

Context: a) General b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: a) “I’m fixing my body up so I seem more attractive and presentable because I want others to view me in a positive light.” b) “I’m fixing your body, by grooming you, because I care about you and how you look and how you feel.”

Variant: See Invisible Lint Picker or Lint Picker.

Cue In Action: a) She pardoned herself from the conversation and reapplied make-up as the rain had washed most of it off. b) He straightened his tie and buttoned up his jacket before giving her a hug and kiss. c) Mom went over to her son and brushed him off. He had leaves all over the back of his shirt.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Grooming and preening says that a person is keeping their outward appearance clean and presentable to show the world that they are in good mental health and, or, a good mate. It tells others that they care about how they are viewed by others and that they are social and amicable.

Preening and grooming can also be one on other people. In this case, it means that a person really cares about someone else and that they want to bond by keeping them healthy. This is an evolutionary throwback to removing bugs as monkeys do today. Preening someone else is a way to form a strong bond between two people. A mother might groom her son and a wife might groom her husband. The context will define its meaning.

When grooming is not required or done to excess in front of another person, it signals distain. Such is the case with removing imaginary lint or picking the fingernails. These are all forms of grooming that should be done in private. If they are done in front of people while avoiding eye contact, and opting out of the conversation, it sends a strong message of disrespect.

Cue Cluster: The cue cluster in which preening appears will depend on its intent. When it is designed to improve outward appearance, then eye contact will continue, a person will continue to pay attention or they will excuse themselves in order to preen. When someone wishes to use grooming in a way as to be dismissive, they will break eye contact, while feigning agreement indicators, or conversely, not even pretend to care about what the other person is saying. Other sexual cues will be present in a dating context to indicate that grooming is sexual in nature.

Body Language Category: Courtship displays, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Liking, Ownership gestures, Preening.

Resources:

Cantor, Michael B. ; Smith, Stephen E. ; Bryan, Bonita R. Induced bad habits: Adjunctive ingestion and grooming in human subjects. Appetite. 1982. 3(1): 1-12.

Curtis, V., & Biran, A. (2001). Dirt, disgust, and disease: Is hygiene in our genes? Perspectives in biology
and medicine, 44(1), 17–31.

de Waal, F. (1997). The chimpanzee’s service economy: Food for grooming. Evolution & Human Behavior, 18, 375–386.

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Hosey, Geoffrey ; Thompson, Robin. Grooming and touching behaviour in captive ring-tailed lemurs ( Lemur catta L.). Primates. 1985. 26(1): 95-98.

Hazan, C., & Shaver, P. (1987). Romantic love conceptualized as an attachment process. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 52, 511–524.

Ingmanson, E. Cultural transmission of a communicative gesture in a captive group of bonobos (Pan paniscus).(Abstract). American Journal of Physical Anthropology. 2002. 117(4): 88(1).

Kinzey, W., & Wright, P. (1982). Grooming behavior in the titi monkey, Callicebus torquatos. American Journal of Primatology, 3, 267–275.

Nelson, Holly ; Geher, Glenn. Mutual Grooming in Human Dyadic Relationships: An Ethological Perspective. Current Psychology. 2007. 26(2): 121-140.

Rempel, J., Holmes, J., & Zanna, M. (1985). Trust in close relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 49, 95–112.

Shimooka, Yukiko ; Nakagawa, Naofumi. Functions of an unreported “rocking-embrace” gesture between female Japanese Macaques ( Macaca fuscata ) in Kinkazan Island, Japan. Primates. 2014. 55(2): 327-335.

Thompson, Kristin. Grooming the Naked Ape: Do Perceptions of Disease and Aggression Vulnerability Influence Grooming Behaviour in Humans? A Comparative Ethological Perspective. Current Psychology. 2010. 29(4): 288-296.

Wachtmeister, C. (2001). Display in monogamous pairs: A review of empirical data and evolutionary explanations. Animal Behaviour, 61(5), 861–868.

Wilkinson, G. S. (1986). Social grooming in the common vampire bat, Desmodus rotundus. Animal Behaviour, 34(6), 1880–1889.

Courtship display, Eye Language, Indicator of interest (IoI), Liking, Nonthreatening body language, Tie signals

Body Language of Gazing Adoringly

by Chris • October 22, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Gazing Adoringly

Cue: Gazing Adoringly

Synonym(s): N/A

Description: The eyes and eyelids relax and move freely from each eye to the mouth and lips, with brief glances to the rest of the face including hair and ears.

In One Sentence: Gazing adoringly indicates a deep emotional connection.

How To Use it: Mothers and fathers naturally use the gaze pattern when looking into the eyes of newborn babies as it helps them from deep bonds. Dating partners should, and do, also use this eye pattern to build trust and connectivity.

Context: a) General b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I’m so infatuated with you that I want to peer right into your soul, through your eyes. I show you this with no tension in my face as my eyes wander about studying everything on your face. I’m connecting with you emotionally.”

Variant: See Intimate Gaze (The) or Triangular Gaze Pattern, Friendly Social Gaze, and Business Gaze.

Cue In Action: a) While breast feeding, the new Mom literally spent hours bonding with baby through mutual gaze. b) The couple gazed adoringly at one another while hanging out at the beach.

Meaning and/or Motivation: An eye pattern stemming from infatuation and deep love and affection that lacks any negative emotion whatsoever. Gazing adoringly happens during courtship between couples and between mothers and their newborn infants as they bond to each other.

Cue Cluster: Gazing adoringly is often coupled with a very relaxed and tranquil face that lacks all tension. The head is usually tilted forward and leaning in, the eyes will be softly focus and will travel from eye-to-eye as if trying to measure emotion.

Body Language Category: Courtship displays, Eye Language, Indicator of interest (IoI), Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Liking, Nonthreatening body language, Tie signals.

Resources:

Argyle, Michael; Lefebvre, Luc; Cook, Mark 1974. The meaning of five patterns of gaze. European Journal of Social Psychology. 4(2): 125-136.

Argyle, M., and Ingham, R. 1972. Gaze, mutual gaze, and proximity. Semiotica, 1, 32–49.

Argyle, M. and Cook, M. Gaze and Mutual Gaze. London: Cambridge University Press, 1976.

Allan Mazur; Eugene Rosa; Mark Faupel; Joshua Heller; Russell Leen; Blake Thurman. Physiological Aspects of Communication Via Mutual Gaze. The American Journal of Sociology. 1980; 86(1): 50-74.

Breed, G., Christiansen, E., & Larson, D. 1972. Effect of lecturer’s gaze direction upon
teaching effectiveness. Catalog of Selected Documents in Psychology, 2: 115.

Colonnesi, Cristina ; Zijlstra, Bonne J. H. ; Van Der Zande, Annesophie ; Bogels, Susan M. Coordination of gaze, facial expressions and vocalizations of early infant communication with mother and father. Infant Behavior and Development. 2012. 35(3): 523(10).

Ellsworth, Phoebe; Carlsmith, J Merrill. 1973. Eye contact and gaze aversion in an aggressive encounter. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 28(2): 280-292.

Foddy, Margaret 1978. Patterns of Gaze in Cooperative and Competitive Negotiation
Human Relations. 31(11):925-938.

Fogel, Alan ; Dedo, Jae Young ; McEwen, Irene. Effect of postural position and reaching on gaze during mother-infant face-to-face interaction. Infant Behavior and Development. 1992. 15(2): 231-244.

Heimann, Mikael. Neonatal imitation, gaze aversion, and mother-infant interaction.
Infant Behavior and Development. 1989. 12(4): 495-505.

Kim, Sohye ; Fonagy, Peter ; Koos, Orsolya ; Dorsett, Kimberly ; Strathearn, Lane. Maternal oxytocin response predicts mother-to-infant gaze. Brain Research. 2014. 1580: 133-142.

Kellerman. 1989. Looking and loving: The effects of mutual gaze on feelings of romantic love. Journal of Research in Personality. 23(2): 145-161.

Kendon, A. Some Functions of Gaze Direction in Social Interaction. Acta Psychologica. 1967. 32: 1-25.

Kleinke, C. L. 1980. Interaction between gaze and legitimacy of request on compliance in a field setting. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior 5(1): 3-12.

Langer, Julia and Rodebaugh, Thomas. Social Anxiety and Gaze Avoidance: Averting Gaze but not Anxiety. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 2013, Vol.37(6): 1110-1120.

Leeb. 2004. Here’s Looking at You, Kid! A Longitudinal Study of Perceived Gender Differences in Mutual Gaze Behavior in Young Infants Source: Sex Roles. 50(1-2): 1-14.

McAndrew. 1986. Arousal seeking and the maintenance of mutual gaze in same and mixed sex dyads Source: Journal of nonverbal behavior. 10(3):168-172.

Mulac, A., Studley, L., Wiemann, J., & Bradac, J. 1987. Male/female gaze in same-sex
and mixed-sex dyads. Human Communication Research. 13: 323-343.

Moszkowski, Robin J. ; Stack, Dale M. ; Chiarella, Sabrina S. Infant touch with gaze and affective behaviors during mother–infant still-face interactions: Co-occurrence and functions of touch. Infant Behavior and Development. 2009. 32(4): 392-403.

Marquette, L. ; Helbraun, E. ; Beebe, B. ; Jaffe, J. Microanalysis of mother-infant gaze and infant self-comfort behavior in dyads reporting high, mid-range, and low maternal depressive symptoms. Infant Behavior and Development. 1998. 21: 554-554.

Natale, Michael. 1976. A Markovian model of adult gaze behavior. Journal of Psycholinguistic Research. 5(1): 53-63.

Williams. 1993. Effects of Mutual Gaze and Touch on Attraction, Mood, and Cardiovascular Reactivity Source: Journal of Research in Personality. 27(2): 170-183.

Comfort body language, Courtship display, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Intention movements, Intimate touching, Liking

Body Language of Full Body Hug or Embrace

by Chris • October 22, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Full Body Hug or Embrace

Cue: Full Body Hug

Synonym(s): Embrace, Hip-To-Hip Hug, Sexual Hug, Hugging Sexually.

Description: This is one of two types of hugs. In this hug, the chests of each person makes contact, but more telling is the pressing together of the hips.

In One Sentence: The full body hug signifies sexual interest and high intimacy.

How To Use it: Testing the willingness to take part in a full hug can indicate the level of attraction between two people. For example, at the end of a date, a man may offer a kiss on the cheek and come in for a hug. If she permits their hips to connect, it’s a strong indication that she truly finds him attractive. On the other hand, should she maintain separation between her hips and his, he should assume that things are progressing more slowly. A large distance, on the other hand, indicates platonic feelings or even dislike. Therefore, the degree of separation between the hips is a good indication of the level of romance.

Context: Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I like you enough to press my entire body against yours, including our hips and genitals.”

Variant: See Hug.

Cue In Action: Dave and Scarlet had been dating for a while. When they hugged their torsos engulfed each others and their hip were tightly pressed together. On their first date, they only leaned in and touched each others shoulders together. Their feelings for each other had changed.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The full body hug is reserved for sexual partners and occurs with full chest-to-chest and hip-to-hip contact. The meaning is sexual in nature. Those who hug by pressing their hips together are telling each other that they are comfortable touching genital-to-genital.

The full hug is a reliable indicator of sexual interest and is never seen with family or friends. Simply by examining how a pair hugs, can tell others what sort of feelings are present. When family members and friends hug they will press their shoulders together and force their hips back and away to protect them from contact. A hug test at the end of the date will tell prospective mates what level of attraction is present.

Cue Cluster: This is a powerful and reliable stand-alone cue of intimacy and requires no additional cues.

Body Language Category: Courtship displays, Comfort body language, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Intimate touching, Intention movements, Liking.

Resources:

Bowlby, J. (1979). The making and breaking of affectional bonds. British Journal of Psychiatry, 130, 201 -210, 42 1-43 1 .

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Bohm. 1997. Effects of interpersonal touch, degree of justification, and sex of participant on compliance with a request. The Journal of social psychology. 137: 460-469.

Derlega, Valerian ; Lewis, Robin ; Harrison, Scott ; Winstead, Barbara ; Costanza, Robert. Gender differences in the initiation and attribution of tactile intimacy. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1989. 13(2): 83-96.

Derlega, Valerian J. ; Catanzaro, Diane ; Lewis, Robin J. Lisak, David (editor). Perceptions About Tactile Intimacy in Same-Sex and Opposite-Sex Pairs Based on Research Participants’ Sexual Orientation. Psychology of Men & Masculinity, 2001, Vol.2(2), pp.124-132

Debrot, Anik ; Schoebi, Dominik ; Perrez, Meinrad ; Horn, Andrea B. Touch as an interpersonal emotion regulation process in couples’ daily lives: the mediating role of psychological intimacy. Personality & social psychology bulletin. 2013. 9(10): 1373-85.

Dickinson, Amy. Block That Hug: The rules on touching children have changed for parents who volunteer as coaches or tutors.(Personal Time/Your Family)(Brief Article). Time. 2000. 155(14): 142.

Fisher, J; Rytting, M and Heslin, R. 1976. Hands touching hands: affective and evaluative effects on interpersonal touch, Sociometry 39: 416–421.

Feldman, R., Singer, M.,& Zagoory, O. (2010). Touch attenuates infants’ physiological reactivity to stress. Developmental Science, 13(2), 271–278.

Fromme, Donald ; Jaynes, William ; Taylor, Deborah ; Hanold, Elaine ; Daniell, Jennifer ; Rountree, J. ; Fromme, Marie. Nonverbal behavior and attitudes toward touch. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1989. 13(1): 3-14.

Flores, Luis E. ; Berenbaum, Howard. Desire for emotional closeness moderates the effectiveness of the social regulation of emotion. Personality and Individual Differences

Floyd, Kory. All Touches are not Created Equal: Effects of Form and Duration on Observers’ Interpretations of an Embrace. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1999. 23(4): 283-299.

Guéguen, N. (2007). Courtship compliance: The effect of touch on women’s behavior. Social Influence, 2, 81-97.

Gueguen, Nicolas. The effect of a woman’s incidental tactile contact on men’s later behavior.(Report). Social Behavior and Personality: an international journal. 2010. 38(2): 257(10).

Guéguen, Nicolas. Nonverbal encouragement of participation in a course: the effect of touching Social Psychology of Education. 2004. 7: 89–98.
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Gurevitch, Z. D. The Embrace: On the Element of Non-Distance in Human Relations. The Sociological Quarterly. 1990. 31(2): 187-201.

Golden, Deborah. Hugging the Teacher: Reading Bodily Practice in an Israeli Kindergarten. Teachers and Teaching: Theory and Practice. 2004. 10(4): 395-407.

Gulledge, Andrew K ; Stahmann, Robert F ; Wilson, Colwick M. Seven types of nonsexual romantic physical affection among Brigham young university students
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Gulledge, Andrewk. ; Gulledge, Michelleh. ; Stahmannn, Robertf. Romantic Physical Affection Types and Relationship Satisfaction. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 2003, Vol.31(4), p.233-242

Greenbaum, Paul ; Rosenfeld, Howard. Varieties of touching in greetings: Sequential structure and sex-related differences. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1980. 5(1): 13-25.

Gulledge, Andrewk. ; Gulledge, Michelleh. ; Stahmannn, Robertf.. Romantic Physical Affection Types and Relationship Satisfaction. The American Journal of Family Therapy. 2003. 31(4): 233-242.

Gulledge, Andrew K ; Stahmann, Robert F ; Wilson, Colwick M. Seven types of nonsexual romantic physical affection among Brigham young university students. Psychological reports. 2004. 95(2): 609-14.

Hosey, Geoffrey ; Thompson, Robin. Grooming and touching behaviour in captive ring-tailed lemurs ( Lemur catta L.). Primates. 1985. 26(1): 95-98.

Hazan, C., & Shaver, P. (1987). Romantic love conceptualized as an attachment process. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 52, 511–524.

Hansen, Jacqueline. The Truth about Teaching and Touching. Childhood Education. 2007. 83(3): 158-162.

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Hugs help protect against stress and infection, say Carnegie Mellon researchers.(Report)
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Attentive body language, Confident body language, Eye Language, Indicator of interest (IoI), Liking

Body Language of Friendly Social Gaze

by Chris • October 22, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of Friendly Social Gaze

Cue: Friendly Social Gaze

Synonym(s): Friendly Eye Contact.

Description: In the friendly gaze, the eyes travel in a triangular pattern from eye-to-eye then to the mouth with some infrequent looks to the rest of the body.

In One Sentence: The friendly social gaze is a nonverbal eye pattern signally a platonic relationship.

How To Use it: To use the friendly gaze, keep the eyes moving about the face with rare glances to the rest of the body. Unlike the business gaze, it is permissible to drop the eyes to the rest of the body, but not to focus on sexual aspects such as breasts, chests, shoulders (in men), and genitals/buttocks. Use the friendly gaze when you want to be clear about a lack of sexual interest. This is especially important to married men and women, whom do not wish to send the wrong impression. In other words, those already in relationships should avoid any other type of eye gaze pattern (besides the business eye gaze pattern) or it may demonstrate unwanted insinuations and therefore may lead to unwanted results.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “We’re friends and I show this to you by not looking at your sexual parts, although I do infrequently inspect the rest of your body (to size you up). However, I do spend most of the time looking at your face to judge your reactions and emotions.”

Variant: See Gazing Adoringly, Gaze Omission, Eye Aversion, Gaze Avoidance and Wandering Eyes.

Cue In Action: During coffee, Dave and Jill engaged in a long conversation about computer programming never once checking each other out below the chin.

Meaning and/or Motivation: When friends talk to one another they aren’t trying to peer into their souls, rather, they gaze.

The gaze is non-threatening and like the intimate gaze, the eyes travel over the face in a specific pattern. The reason we cast our eyes infrequently over other parts of the body in the friendly gaze is simply due to the reason that it is of less interest and of less value in friendship. This is just the opposite of that which happens in the intimate gaze.

With friends, gaze is brief, lasting only about three seconds followed by looking away.

The research tells us that about seventy-five percent of the time eyes travel through the triangular pattern from the eyes to the mouth, ten percent of the time is spent on forays to the forehead and hair, and five percent to the chin, with the remaining time split on various other features.

After a period of gaze or mutual eye-contact both people will avert their eyes downward instead of left, right or upward. Looking down, on the other hand is a symbol of submission whereas looking left or right can imply disinterest (or interest in something else), or a desire to withdraw from the conversation.

Cue Cluster: N/A

Body Language Category: Attentive, Confident body language, Eye Language, Indicator of interest (IoI), Liking.