Category: Disapproval cues

Body Language of Whining Voice or Whine

Body Language of Whining Voice or Whine

No picCue: Whining Voice or Whine

Synonym(s): Nagging.

Description: Nagging can be sign-song-like, high pitched, grating, continuous, and meant to annoy.

In One Sentence: A whining voice is a form of punishment used to manipulate other people into doing something they’d rather not do.

How To Use it: Whining can only be used effectively when there is a sympathetic listener. Therefore, the cue is generally reserved for women and children. While men can sometimes use whining, it is likely to result in a poor reflection of him and also yield poor results overall. That is not to say that women and children do not receive negative judgment when whining, however, the negative impression is usually short-lived and the pay-out in terms of results, therefore, worth it. Whining works as a “negative reinforcement” as the whiner promises to eliminate her whine once she has received her currency.

Context: a) General b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I’m incapable of solving my own problems so I punish people around me with a shrill, continuous, and annoying voice, in hopes that someone else will pick up the slack for me and serve my needs.”

Variant: See Voice Pitch.

Cue In Action: a) She whined incessantly – through the entire car ride. She wanted mom and dad to stop for ice-cream. Finally, dad had enough, pulled the car over at the nearest chain restaurant and bought her a cone just to make it stop. b) She whined incessantly – daily. She wanted a diamond ring and she wasn’t going to take “no” for an answer. Finally he broke down, pulled her into the ring store and bought her a ring just to make it stop.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Whining is a childlike voice trait aimed specifically at manipulating other people without using forceful words. Whining is a form of punishment to those who hear it. The whiner assumes that their annoying speaking patterns will motivation someone to action on their behalf, with the reward being whine cessation. In other words, the whine pushes those around him or her into action “just to make the whining stop.” Often, this only encourages the whine to return in the future as whining has been rewarded. Whining is considered a passive aggressive form of non-physical violence.

Those who use whining voices are usually followers by nature and often prefer to complain rather than take action themselves. The whiner is hoping others will take care of them. When suggestions to take charge of their own fate are suggested they are quickly rejected, then the person will often withdraw and pout. Whiners often surround themselves with people who are sympathetic to their complaints and help them.

Those who whine are often infantile in their character traits when they aren’t actually infants themselves. Toddlers habitually manipulate adults through whining, but adults, frequently female, will maintain the trait in effort to coax men around them perform favours for them. When grown men whine, it is particularly off-putting.

Cue Cluster: Whining is often coupled with submissive postures and infantile or eratic behaviour such as flailing arms, pouting, downcast eyes, crying, holding the breath, kicking and screaming, flopping on the floor or self harm and breaking things.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Aggressive body language, Audible signals, Disapproval cues, Hostile body language, Pseudo-infantile gestures.

Resources:

Bachorowski, J., & Owren, M. J. (1995). Vocal expression of emotion: Acoustic properties of speech are associated with emotional intensity and context. Psychological Science, 6, 219–224.

Chang, Rosemarie Sokol and Thompson, Nicholas S. Whines, cries, and motherese: Their relative power to distract. Journal of Social, Evolutionary, and Cultural Psychology.2011. 5(2): 131-141.

Herold, Debora S. ; Nygaard, Lynne C. ; Namy, Laura L. Say It like You Mean It: Mothers’ Use of Prosody to Convey Word Meaning. Language and Speech. 2012. 55(3): 423-436.

Kowalski, Robin M. Whining, griping, and complaining: Positivity in the negativity. Journal of Clinical Psychology. 2002. 58(9): 1023-1035.

Nygaard, L. C., & Queen, J. S. (2008). Communicating emotion: Linking affective prosody and word meaning. Journal of Experimental Psychology: Human Perception and Performance, 34, 1017–1030.

Scherer, K., Banse, R., Wallbott, H., & Goldbeck, T. (1991). Vocal cues in emotion encoding and decoding. Motivation and Emotion, 15, 123–148.

Singh, L., Morgan, J. L., & Best, C. T. (2002). Infants’ listening preferences: Baby talk or happy talk? Infancy, 3, 365–394.

Scherer, Klaus R. Personality inference from voice quality: The loud voice of extroversion. European Journal of Social Psychology. 1978 8(4): 467-487.

Trainor, L. J., Austin, C. M., & Desjardins, R. N. (2000). Is infant-directed speech prosody a result of the vocal expression of emotion? Psychological Science, 11, 188–195.

Siegman, Aron Wolfe ; Boyle and Stephen Mineka. Voices of Fear and Anxiety and Sadness and Depression: The Effects of Speech Rate and Loudness on Fear and Anxiety and Sadness and Depression. Journal of Abnormal Psychology. 1993. 102(3): 430-437.

Sokol, Rosemarie I. ; Webster, Karen L. ; Thompson, Nicholas S. ; Stevens, David A. Whining as mother‐directed speech. Infant and Child Development. 2005. 14(5): 478-490.

Walker-Andrews, A., & Grolnick, W. (1983). Discrimination of vocal expressions by young infants. Infant Behavior and Development, 6, 491–498.

Body Language of Touch Reduction

Body Language of Touch Reduction

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Touch Reduction 1Cue: Touch Reduction.

Synonym(s): Reduced Touching.

Description: Touching between two people is either stopped abruptly or stopped gradually over time.

In One Sentence: Touch reduction indicates a difference of opinion or anxiety.

How To Use it: When you wish to send the signal that you disapprove, create space between you and the person you object to. This can easily be done through touch reduction, especially if it is done suddenly. Reducing touch is especially potent between couples and family members, as touching is usually much more frequent in these close associations. During a disagreement, pulling the hands inward and away from your partner tells them that you want them to change their stance on matters. Reducing or eliminating touching is the nonverbal signal for emotional withdrawal. Therefore, the signal is considered an honest marker for your thoughts and feelings.

Context: a) General b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I’m not in agreement with you. I’m putting up and maintaining space between the both of us serving to demonstrate nonverbally our differences of opinion.”

Variant: See Arm Withdrawal or Leg Withdrawal, Touching or Increase In Touching.

Cue In Action: a) Mom wanted her son to stop being so rambunctious, but he wouldn’t listen. Then the inevitable happened – he fell and skinned his knee. Ordinarily she would comfort him immediately, but she refused. She displayed her disapproval nonverbally. b) Instead of sitting tightly together on the same side of the sofa and snuggle as they usually would, the couple sat at opposite ends. They had a tiff and didn’t want to be close to one another.

Meaning and/or Motivation: It should be noted that ‘touch reduction’ is also a sudden change in ‘touch frequency.’ Couples have even been shown to draw away from each other when they are generally unhappy with their relationship.

Touch reduction is usually accompanied with stressful situations therefore signaling anxiety. We may see touch reduction during intense interrogation and may accompany compelling or damning information.

Closeness can also be useful when assessing someone because it will invoke distancing desires. When talking with a spouse or child, sit as close to them as you are accustomed to. Then take up serious matters. If someone is hiding something, they will usually push away or even stand up looking for ways to exit or change the subject. Holding the hand of a child can be particularly useful when discussing matters of dishonesty. If they wish to exit the discussion, they will try to tug their hand away [note: trying to withdraw is not a signal of culpability, but it is a signal of anxiety through a desire for distance].

Liars rarely touch others when they lie to them as this is a natural part of the fight or flight response. During intense interactions the subconscious mind does not respond well to intimacy caused by touching. This can prove helpful in intimate relationships, with family members or children since touching is a normal part of everyday life. Any form of touch reduction can signal that a person is at odds with another and that they might be hiding something.

If touch isn’t normal, for example, between strangers or acquaintances, then measuring touch reduction won’t be possible. In this case, look for distancing behaviours instead such as arm withdrawal or leaning away, especially in the torso, as these are also forms of distancing.

Cue Cluster: Touch reduction is usually accompanied by leaning away, ventral denial, head back or away, eyes averted, reduction in movement or freezing behaviour, reduction in verbal communication and so forth.

Body Language Category: Amplifier, Anger body language, Disengagement body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Disapproval cues, Distancing or moving away, Emotional body language, Indicators of disinterest (IOD).

Resources:

Argo, J. J., Dahl, D. W., & Morales, A. C. (2006). Consumer contamination: How consumers react to products touched by others. Journal of Marketing, 70(April), 81–94.

Aranguren, Martin. “Nonverbal interaction patterns in the Delhi Metro: interrogative looks and play-faces in the management of interpersonal distance.” Interaction Studies. 2016. 16(1) forthcoming.

Aranguren, Martin. “Nonverbal interaction patterns in the Delhi Metro: interrogative looks and play-faces in the management of interpersonal distance.” Interaction Studies. 2016. 16(1) forthcoming.

Aranguren, Martin and Stephane Tonnelat. Emotional Transactions in the Paris Subway: Combining Naturalistic Videotaping, Objective Facial Coding and Sequential Analysis in the Study of Nonverbal Emotional Behavior. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 2014. 38:495–521. DOI 10.1007/s10919-014-0193-1
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/seriously-stop-touching-use-nonverbal-signaling-manage-unwanted-touching-busy-public

Bailenson, J.N. & Yee, N. (in press). Virtual interpersonal touch: Haptic interaction and copresence in collaborative virtual environments. International Journal of Multimedia Tools and Applications.

Bohm. 1997. Effects of interpersonal touch, degree of justification, and sex of participant on compliance with a request. The Journal of social psychology. 137: 460-469.

Crusco, A. and C. Wetzel. 1984. The midas touch: the effects of interpersonal touch on restaurant tipping, Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 10: 512–517.

Dickinson, Amy. Block That Hug: The rules on touching children have changed for parents who volunteer as coaches or tutors.(Personal Time/Your Family)(Brief Article). Time. 2000. 155(14): 142.

Debrot, Anik ; Schoebi, Dominik ; Perrez, Meinrad ; Horn, Andrea B. Touch as an interpersonal emotion regulation process in couples’ daily lives: the mediating role of psychological intimacy. Personality & social psychology bulletin. 2013. 9(10): 1373-85.

Derlega, Valerian ; Lewis, Robin ; Harrison, Scott ; Winstead, Barbara ; Costanza, Robert. Gender differences in the initiation and attribution of tactile intimacy. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1989. 13(2): 83-96.

Derlega, Valerian J. ; Catanzaro, Diane ; Lewis, Robin J. Lisak, David (editor). Perceptions About Tactile Intimacy in Same-Sex and Opposite-Sex Pairs Based on Research Participants’ Sexual Orientation. Psychology of Men & Masculinity, 2001, Vol.2(2), pp.124-132

Fisher, J; Rytting, M and Heslin, R. 1976. Hands touching hands: affective and evaluative effects on interpersonal touch, Sociometry 39: 416–421.

Feldman, R., Singer, M.,& Zagoory, O. (2010). Touch attenuates infants’ physiological reactivity to stress. Developmental Science, 13(2), 271–278.

Fromme, Donald ; Jaynes, William ; Taylor, Deborah ; Hanold, Elaine ; Daniell, Jennifer ; Rountree, J. ; Fromme, Marie. Nonverbal behavior and attitudes toward touch. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1989. 13(1): 3-14.

Floyd, Kory. All Touches are not Created Equal: Effects of Form and Duration on Observers’ Interpretations of an Embrace. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1999. 23(4): 283-299.

Guéguen, Nicolas. Nonverbal encouragement of participation in a course: the effect of touching Social Psychology of Education. 2004. 7: 89–98.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/a-touching-way-to-encourage/

Gueguen, Nicolas; Sebastien Meineri and Virginie Charles-Sire. Improving Medication Adherence by Using Practitioner Nonverbal Techniques: A Field Experiment on the Effect of Touch. Journal of Behavioral Medice. 2010. 33:466–473
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http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/touching-boosts-compliance-improving-medical-compliance-using-nonverbal-communication/

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Body Language of Toe Pointing or Pointed Toe

Body Language of Toe Pointing or Pointed Toe

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Toe Pointing or Pointed Toe 4 BodyLanguageProjectCom - Toe Pointing or Pointed Toe 2Cue: Toe Pointing or Pointed Toe.

Synonym(s): Pointed Toe, Foot Pointing, Feet Indicating, Feet Toward, Feet Away, Goodbye Feet, Honest Feet, Foot Pointing Language.

Description: When the feet point toward the direction they wish to travel.

In One Sentence: Toes are believed to subconsciously signal the direction in which people wish to travel, or in the direction in which they are thinking.

How To Use it: Foot pointing usually goes unnoticed, however, to show intimacy and focus, orient the entire body toward the person who you wish to express your undivided attention. This works well in business, dating, as well as other relationships. Showing others that they have your nonverbal attention is much more powerful than simply lending an ear or an eye. Despite the cue being out of usual awareness, it is quite likely that others will pick up on your cue and ascribe to you positive attributes. See Meaning and/or Motivation for more ideas about constructive uses for foot pointing.

Context: a) General b) Dating.

Verbal Translation: “My feet are honest and point in the direction I wish to travel.”

Variant: See Arm Withdrawal or Leg Withdrawal.

Cue In Action: a) In his excitement, he failed to realize that his buddy really needed to get going. His buddy’s head began to drag backwards, his torso faced away, and his feet were aimed away from him and toward his car. His body language really said that he needed to get going. b) He wasn’t interested and wanted to leave – his feet slowly inched toward the doorway rather than toward her. On the other hand, her feet were directly facing, and extended, in his direction. The affection was not mutual.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Feet are intension cues because they are the earliest indicators of where the mind wishes to go. Feet point to doorways when someone wants to leave and away from people they do not agree with. If feet are pointed away from you, it’s a strong indicator that a person wishes to be elsewhere.

It has been said that the feet are the most honest part of the body as it applies to the language they emit. Millions of years ago, we gave up quadrupedalism to walk upright, leaving our feet to the dirt. While our hands busied themselves with other complex tasks like fire building, making clothing, shelters and throwing spears, our legs were relegated to more primitive activities like locomotion.

The feet have always carried out more traditional tasks like escaping predators, avoiding hot sand or coals from a fire, leaping from slithering snakes or poisonous spiders, or navigating rough rocking river bottoms. The feet were therefore connected more to the reptilian brain that reacts to stimuli directly. The feet don’t contemplate higher order tasks that require planning.

Feet, therefore, make great predictors of behaviour. For example, we know that children are interested in play rather then eating when their legs bounce at the dinner table. Their feet bounce up and down as they quickly gobble their food so they don’t miss the action. Even if feet don’t fidget they will still point, or inch toward the door in effort to prepare for escape. Therefore, the feet of adults reveal true emotions by pointing away from boring conversations and towards things they find attractive or stimulating.

Cue Cluster: Usually the torso also tends to aim in the direction of desired travel, along with the head. Conversations will begin to dry up, agreement indicators either speed up to quicken the conversation or slow down if there is little more to say. Barriers like arm crossing or partial arm crossing will accompany the foot indication.

Body Language Category: Body pointing, Disengagement body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Disapproval cues, Distancing or moving away, Escape movements, Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Indicator of interest (IoI), Intention movements, Orienting reflex or orienting response (a), Rejection body language, Ready language.

Resources:

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Body Language of Tense Face

Body Language of Tense Face

No picCue: Tense Face.

Synonym(s): Stressed Face, Uneasy Face.

Description: A face that is compressed or contorted by various muscles such as the one between the eyebrows. This muscle will force the eyebrows together creating a wrinkle. The eyes are squinted and the lips are compressed or pursed.

In One Sentence: A tense face indicates stress, worry, and discomfort.

How To Use it: Use a tense face to show that you are not content in the situation. You can signal others that you are in emotional or physical pain by flexing muscles in the face. You may show a tense face when receiving negative news, when presented an unfavourable offer such as in negotiation, when seeing something visually distressing, and so forth. In other words, use a tense face when you want to show others your discomfort and dislike.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: “I’m full of stress or worry and am uncomfortable, I hold some degree of negative thoughts which is shown through various muscular contractions in my face.”

Variant: See Eyebrows Knit or Oblique Eyebrows Of Grief, Relaxed Face.

Cue In Action: As the details of the contract became clear, his face began to show signs of disagreement. When the split was offered at 40/60, his eyes squinted. When there was an additional royalty added, his lips compressed. The deal breaker came when he stated the he would be completely bought out of the company at the five year mark. This caused his forehead to furrowed in anger. His body language clearly signaled that had enough with the contract and he wouldn’t sign it.

Meaning and/or Motivation: A tense face is one that shows discomfort and discomfort is a cue that delineates a lack of honesty and that the body is concerned with negative thoughts.

Bodies show additional discomfort through an increased heart rate, breath rate, sweating, a change in normal colour in the face or neck, trembling or shaking in the hands lips, or elsewhere, compressing the lips, fidgeting, drumming the fingers and other repetitive behaviours. Voices often crack when under stress, mouths might dry up producing noticeable swallowing, “hard swallows”, or frequent throat clearing.

Cue Cluster: The eyes are compressed, tense and focused, the arms and legs will cross, the lips purse and licked frequently, people will tighten their bodies up, they might stop speaking, legs and toes may face away from the negative stimuli and toward the door, breathing might be shallow or exaggerated as if ready for action, hands might be rubbed against one other or against the thighs, the face might be touched and the skin pinched, plucked or scratched.

Body Language Category: Confused body language, Closed body language, Closed facial gestures, Dislike (nonverbal), Disapproval cues, Emotional body language, Evaluative body language, Negative body language, Stressful body language, Worry body language.

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Body Language of Palm Out or Talk To The Hand.

Body Language of Palm Out or Talk To The Hand.

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Palm Out or Talk To The Hand 1Cue: Palm Out or Talk To The Hand

Synonym(s): Talk To The Hand, Hand To Others, Palm Stop, Palm In Your Face.

Description: The hand comes up abruptly like a stop signal toward another person as the head and eyes turn away.

In One Sentence: Placing the palm out toward another person is a nonverbal way to tell them to stop talking.

How To Use it: Use the palm out gesture to nonverbally tell someone to ‘shut up.’ Many nonverbal signals are safer than actual words and this is no exception. A palm out can quiet a person without being forced to be overt and actually tell them to do so. Often this saves us from more dramatic confrontation.

The same gesture works on a large crowd when it would be impractical to yell over them. A flash of the palms, or persistently held palm out, tells others to heed to your dominance, as you are prepared to take over.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: a) “I’m using my hand and palm to tell you to stop talking immediately, I don’t want to hear it.” b) “Talk to the hand, because I’m not listening, that’s enough already.”

Variant: See Palm Down Displays or Palm Power, Palm Up Displays or The Rogatory Posture.

Cue In Action: She had enough, the conversation had gone on long enough. The personal insults were going too far. She put her hand up in her face and turned her head away. It was clear she didn’t want to hear another word from her.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Palms carry important power. This palm out, or palm-in-your-face-gesture, is a conversation ender. It is a way for people to say that they do not wish to entertain any more thoughts and have a strong unwillingness to speak. The combination of palms as power and insisting that someone speak to them implies that we wish to offer our disrespect.

Palms carry very significant power and whereas palms up are accepting or offering, palms out or down, signify power and dominance. The intent of palms in someone else’s face is one of high authority and to send message of disagreement and that they are disgraceful and deserve no respect.

Cue Cluster: Watch for the head to quickly turn away and down, eyes averted.

Body Language Category: Arrogance or arrogant body language, Authoritative body language, Barriers, Blocking or Shielding, Closed body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Disapproval cues, Dominant body language, Hostile body language, Palm power, Regulators, Rejection body language, Speech-independent gestures.

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