Category: Courtship display

Attentive body language, Barriers, Courtship display, Defensive body language, Dislike (nonverbal), Escape movements, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Indicators of sexual disinterest (IOsD), Intention movements, Liking, Orienting reflex or orienting response

The Hidden Meaning of Blading Body Language, Body Angling or Ventral Displays

by Chris • October 18, 2014 • 0 Comments

The Hidden Meaning of Blading Body Language, Body Angling or Ventral Displays

Cue: Blading Body Language, Body Angling or Ventral Displays

Synonym(s): Ventral Displays, Ventral Fronting, Ventral Denial, Ventral Distancing, Body Orientation, Body Angling, Seated Body Pointing, Turning The Body Away From Someone, Turning The Body Toward Someone, Chest Orientation, Facing Away, Facing Toward.

Description: The turning of the body, the shoulders and chest, either toward or away from stimuli.

In One Sentence: Bodies turn toward ideas and people they agree with, and turn away from ideas and people they disagree with.

How To Use it: The application of blading body language is simple in practice. To show or feign agreement simply turn your shoulders toward the speaker. To show or feign disagreement simply turn your shoulders away from the speaker. Feigning either condition can force other people to chase you, despite your general agreement. This can be effective in a dating context as your counterpart will work harder to placate your interests. This can also be effective in negotiations. Simply blade away to show that the offer advanced does not meet your conditions. Your “disinterest” will create an incentive to boost their offer in your favour.

Context: General.

Verbal Translation: a) “I like what I’m hearing so my body is angling toward you so we’re facing each other even more” b) “I don’t like what I’m hearing so my body is angling away from you so I can leave.”

Variant: Bodies might be angled or leaned in toward someone that is liked the most rather than for any form of agreement or disagreement.

Cue In Action: a) Jill turned her shoulders toward Bill when he paid her an honest compliment. b) When the much more successful associate, Frank arrived, Jill slowly turned away from Bill to focus her attention on Frank. After turning toward Frank, she made eye contact and began preening herself by fixing her hair. Her interest shifted from Bill to Frank which was obvious to onlookers by her shift in orientation.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Torsos house important vital organs that are responsible for keeping the body alive. Heart, lungs, liver, intestines and so forth are all easily accessible through a thin layer of skin, fat, muscle, ribs and a sternum and exposing our ventral side means that we trust we won’t be attacked and is therefore a signal of openness and liking. Ventral sides are usually oriented toward people we like and away from those we dislike.

Torsos will turn and angle away more and more as an encounter becomes more disagreeable. On the other hand, torsos will angle and turn toward as an encounter becomes more agreeable. When torsos face each other head-on, however, this can indicate direct confrontation or, contrarily, high intimacy (and engagement).

“Blading away” is to “turn the back on someone.” This demonstrates dislike, disagreement and disengagement.

“Blading toward” is to “turn to face someone.” This demonstrates liking, agreement and engagement.

Think of a knife, a “blade” that is turned on an angle so as to slice more or less sharply.

The greater the angle the greater the relative nonverbal meaning.

Cue Cluster: a) Ventral fronting or blading toward can be accompanied by leaning in to increase proximity, removing objects to create a clear view and various agreement indicators such as head nodding, eye contact, and touching. b) Ventral denial can appear with slouching, lean backward, orienting the torso away, or placing objects in front of the body such as clothing or books.

Body Language Category: a) Attentive, Courtship display, Liking, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Intention movements, Orienting reflex or orienting response b) Barriers, Defensive, Dislike (nonverbal), Escape movements, Indicators of disinterest (IOD), Indicators of sexual disinterest (IOsD), Intention movements, Orienting reflex or orienting response.

Resources:

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Courtship display, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Readiness to submit postures, Submissive body language, Tie signals

Body Language Of Bent Over Posture Or Rump Presentation

by Chris • October 18, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language Of Bent Over Posture Or Rump Presentation

Cue: Bent Over Posture

Synonym(s): Rump Presentation, Grinding Against Another Person.

Description: A primarily female posture done by bending forward at the waist facing away from a person (the body language reader or recipient of the cue) such that the rump is presented teasingly.

In One Sentence: Presenting the rump to another person is a sure sign that they are willing to sexually submit.

How To Use it: Women can use the rump presentation to arouse and excite potential male suitors. It is particularly effective in a dance bar type situation. Women should show and grind their rump into men they find interesting to send a clear sexual invitation. Rumps can also allure by bending at the waist in plain view of men women wish to attract. This can be done by bending over to pick up dropped materials, over a photocopy machine and so forth. At times, a subtle rump presentation with a slight bend at the waist is all that is needed.

Presenting the rump can also be accomplished by wearing tight fitting clothing as it puts the rump on full display to potential suitors. When women choose tight fitting leggings, even if they do not completely understand their motives, are displaying their best features in plain view of the world. Therefore, be it conscious or otherwise, they desire and should expect, sexual attention. It is important for motives to be understood such that one can control outcomes as desired.

Women may also use the rump presentation to tease and control men. As the signal is nonverbal it’s meaning can be ambiguous, or, rather, be sent out in a “broadcast fashion” to many men. Thus, it can serve to solicit, and then reject men – a power play.

Context: a) Dating.

Verbal Translation: “I’m presenting my rump, it’s a sexual invitation.” “I am offering myself in a passive female role.” “I’m going to wear these tight leggings to show off my sexual virility through a rump display.”

Variant: A bent over posture can be adopted while working or when getting things done that are out of reach such as tying a shoe or picking up something that has fallen which has no sexual meaning at all due to its absence of eye contact as an anchor of intent. See Courtship Displays (Category).

Cue In Action: a) While dancing, Julie rubbed up against him in a sexual manner. It almost became a habit, every day, she’d purposely drop things on the floor near his desk and suggestively bend at the waste to pick them up – she was trying to get his sexual attention. a) She decided to wear tight fitting pants to show off her tight rump.

Meaning and/or Motivation: Bending over is a submissive appeasement posture when done facing away with the rump toward the recipient. It is an overt sexual invitation as it is a nonverbal request to “be mounted.” Young girls might be seen doing this while dancing in nightclubs as they grind on men teasingly. The bow has origins in the same submissive bent over posture, however it is usually, but not always, is done facing the person who is more dominate and has no sexual meaning.

Bending over might be thought of as an overt posture, but it often happens quite inconspicuously and quite subconsciously. It is commonplace for movies to use the overt rump over presentation coupled with over the shoulder eye contact, but this is rare in real life. Women who are receptive commonly act teasingly without even knowing it, as they emit nonverbal invitations to pursue on a purely emotional level. Women have also been shown to display sexually as broadcast signals where sexual message are sent out at random hoping to achieve the attention of worthy mates.

Cue Cluster: Rump presentation is usually accompanied with other sexually suggestive cues such as hair tossing, neck displays, licking the lips, eye contact while looking over the shoulder and so forth.

Body Language Category: Courtship display, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Readiness to submit postures, Submissive body language, Tie signals.

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Arousal, Autonomic signal, Courtship display, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Liking

The Hidden Meaning Behind Bedroom Eyes or Dilated Pupils

by Chris • October 17, 2014 • 0 Comments

The Hidden Meaning Behind Bedroom Eyes or Dilated Pupils

Cue: Bedroom Eyes or Dilated Pupils.

Synonym(s): Dilated Pupils, Wide pupils, Big Pupils, Pupil Dilation.

Description: When the eyes view something arousing, the pupils dilate or widen so as to allow more light to penetrate the retina and improve vision.

In One Sentence: Eyes in which the pupils dilate demonstrate a state of arousal which can be due to negative or positive emotional stimuli.

How To Use it: Artificially lowering the lights by the use of dimmers or candle light can make the pupils dilate. This makes the eyes appear more attractive. Women who wish to make their online photos appear more alluring may artificially doctor their images by enlarging their pupils. Contact lenses with large pupils can also produce the same effect. While it is not consciously possible to dilate the pupils, avoiding bright locations can produce the impression of higher arousal and even attraction. This can produce desired effects in a dating context.

Context: a) Dating b) General.

Verbal Translation: “I am aroused by what I’m seeing and want to take it all in.”

Variant: See Beady Little Eyes.

Cue In Action: a) When she saw the man of her dreams walk into the room, her eyes became fully dilated – she had bedroom eyes for him. b) Mother’s eyes dilated as she gazed adoringly at her newborn.

Meaning and/or Motivation: In body language pupils react to arousal, be it from fear or attraction of any kind. When the eyes view something stimulating, they dilate or open so as to allow more light to penetrate making seeing easier.

Various studies show that our pupils also respond to positive stimuli by constricting when a person sees unpleasant or uninteresting stimuli. For example, pupils constrict when viewing nude images of the same sex but dilate when viewing images of the opposite sex. Viewing unpleasant images such as crippled children, war scenes, or torture, leads to the constriction of the pupils.

Increased pupil size can be an indication of any positive stimuli such as food when hungry, or when seeking companionship, other potential suitors in a room. Italian women in the 18th century would place eye drops called belladonna containing atropine to chemically induce their eyes to dilate in order to elicit attention from men.

Cue Cluster: Various other cues might arise in accompaniment with bedroom eyes such as coy smiles, head tilting and various flirty and courtship behaviour such as hair tossing. In a general context we expect to see more positive body language such as relaxed facial expressions, eye contact, arms uncrossed, body leaning in, head titled to the side and so forth.

Body Language Category: Courtship display, Arousal, Autonomic signal, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Liking.

Resources:

Adolphs, Ralph A. 2006. Landmark study finds that when we look at sad faces, the size of the pupil we look at influences the size of our own pupil Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience. 1(1): 3-4

Ariel, Robert and Castel, Alan. Eyes wide open: enhanced pupil dilation when selectively studying important information. Experimental Brain Research, 2014. 232(1):.337-344.

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Goldinger SD, Papesh MH (2012) Pupil Dilation Reflects the Creation and Retrieval of Memories. Current Directions in Psychological Science 21: 90–95.

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Zellin, Martina; Pannekamp, Ann; Toepel, Ulrike; van der Meer, Elke. In the eye of the listener: Pupil dilation elucidates discourse processing. International Journal of Psychophysiology, 2011, Vol.81(3): 133-141.

Comfort body language, Courtship display, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Ownership gesture, Rapport or rapport building

Body Language of The Arm Over The Shoulder

by Chris • October 17, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language of The Arm Over The Shoulder

Cue: Arm Over The Shoulder.

Synonym(s): Shoulder Embrace.

Description: The arm is tossed over the shoulder of a friend, relative, business partner, or a date.

In One Sentence: The hand over the shoulder of another is a display of ownership.

How To Use it: Use this cue to signal dominance, control and ownership of another person. The signal can also be used to demonstrate friendship, intimacy or camaraderie. Toss your arm over another person to build friendships and trust through connectivity. Usually touching between people is reserved for high ranking people against low ranking people, or people of the same rank, so be careful how you use touching in relationships. An arm over the shoulder is particularly risky as it uses a palm down hand orientation which is dominant coupled with weight placed over the shoulders of another which is to metaphorically “push someone down.” If this is tolerated, you can assume that they are willing to “bear the weight of your friendship.” Thus, the arm over the shoulder can test friendships and desire for submission at the same time. You may experiment with this in dating (man tossing arm over the shoulder of a woman) or to test rank between friends. High ranking people will be able to use this signal with more liberty than low ranking people.

Context: a) Friendly b) Business c) Courtship

Verbal Translation: “I like you as a friend and buddy.”

Variant: A hand might be placed on the forearm, hand, or shoulder of another, to show less intimacy but still connectivity. Elderly ladies will do this when trying to connect with younger people as they work to maintain their attention.

Variant: See Hip Embrace, Full Body Hug.

Cue In Action: a) Dad and his son were joking around together. He threw his arm over his shoulder and pulled him in for a quick hug. b) An arm is tossed over the shoulder with a quick squeeze as business partners meet over beer. c) Intimate couples walk shoulder to shoulder.

Meaning and/or Motivation: The arm over the shoulder is a friendly type gesture signifying camaraderie, but also some low level of intimacy depending on the context.

The shoulder embrace might occur between adult men, or between a mother and her child, and is therefore non-sexual, non-intimate in nature.

Cue Cluster: N/A

Body Language Category: Comfort body language, Courtship display, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Ownership gesture, Rapport or rapport building.

Resources:

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Derlega, Valerian J. ; Catanzaro, Diane ; Lewis, Robin J. Lisak, David (editor). Perceptions About Tactile Intimacy in Same-Sex and Opposite-Sex Pairs Based on Research Participants’ Sexual Orientation. Psychology of Men & Masculinity, 2001, Vol.2(2), pp.124-132

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Floyd, Kory. All Touches are not Created Equal: Effects of Form and Duration on Observers’ Interpretations of an Embrace. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1999. 23(4): 283-299.

Golden, Deborah. Hugging the Teacher: Reading Bodily Practice in an Israeli Kindergarten. Teachers and Teaching: Theory and Practice. 2004. 10(4): 395-407.

Greenbaum, Paul ; Rosenfeld, Howard. Varieties of touching in greetings: Sequential structure and sex-related differences. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1980. 5(1): 13-25.

Gurevitch, Z. D. The Embrace: On the Element of Non-Distance in Human Relations. The Sociological Quarterly. 1990. 31(2): 187-201.

Gulledge, Andrew K ; Stahmann, Robert F ; Wilson, Colwick M. Seven types of nonsexual romantic physical affection among Brigham young university students
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Gulledge, Andrewk. ; Gulledge, Michelleh. ; Stahmannn, Robertf. Romantic Physical Affection Types and Relationship Satisfaction. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 2003, Vol.31(4), p.233-242

Guéguen, N. (2007). Courtship compliance: The effect of touch on women’s behavior. Social Influence, 2, 81-97.

Guéguen, Nicolas. Nonverbal encouragement of participation in a course: the effect of touching Social Psychology of Education. 2004. 7: 89–98.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/a-touching-way-to-encourage/

Gurevitch, Z. D. The Embrace: On the Element of Non-Distance in Human Relations. The Sociological Quarterly. 1990. 31(2): 187-201.

Greenbaum, Paul ; Rosenfeld, Howard. Varieties of touching in greetings: Sequential structure and sex-related differences. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 1980. 5(1): 13-25.

Hansen, Jacqueline. The Truth about Teaching and Touching. Childhood Education. 2007. 83(3): 158-162.

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Hadi, Rhonda ; Valenzuela, Ana. A meaningful embrace: Contingent effects of embodied cues of affection. Journal of Consumer Psychology, 2014, Vol.24(4), pp.520-532.

Hadi, R., and Valenzuela, A., A meaningful embrace: Contingent effects of embodied cues of affection. Journal of Consumer Psychology. 2014.
http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/whats-in-a-nonverbal-object-caress/

Hazan, C., & Shaver, P. (1987). Romantic love conceptualized as an attachment process. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 52, 511–524.

Hugs help protect against stress and infection, say Carnegie Mellon researchers.(Report)
Health & Medicine Week, Jan 2, p.1341

Krishna, A., & Morrin, M. (2008). Does touch affect taste? The perceptual transfer of product container haptic cues. Journal of Consumer Research, 34(6), 807–818.

Landau, Rivka. Affect and attachment: Kissing, hugging, and patting as attachment behaviors. Infant Mental Health Journal. 1989. 10(1): 59-69.

Larsen, Knuds. ; Leroux, Jeff. A study of same sex touching attitudes: Scale development and personality predictors. Journal of Sex Research. 1984. 20(3): 264-278.

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Peck, J., & Shu, S. B. (2009). The effect of mere touch on perceived ownership. Journal of Consumer Research, 36(Oct), 434–447.

Peck, J., & Wiggins, J. (2006). It just feels good: Consumers’ affective response to touch and its influence on persuasion. Journal of Marketing, 70(Oct), 56–69.

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Rabinowitz, Fredric E. The male-to-male embrace: breaking the touch taboo in a men’s therapy group. Journal of Counseling and Development. 1991. 69(6): 574(3).

Hugs help protect against stress and infection, say Carnegie Mellon researchers.(Report)
Health & Medicine Week, Jan 2, p.1341

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Courtship display, Dislike (nonverbal), Dominant body language, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI)

Body Language Of Accidental Touching

by Chris • October 16, 2014 • 0 Comments

Body Language Of Accidental Touching

Cue: Accidental Touching

Synonym(s): Touching By Accident, Brushing Up Against Someone Accidentally,Bumping Into Someone.

Description: Touching between two people that seems to happen without meaning.

In One Sentence: Accidental touching can happen between random strangers usually in busy or crowded environments, or alternatively, done out of conscious awareness in order to create bonding and intimacy.

How To Use it: Accidental touching can be used to spark sexual interest or intimacy. This is done simply by lightly brushing up or bumping against another in order to put you on their sexual radar. Likewise, by sharing space that is very tight, friendships can blossom through occasional accidental touches. It may also be used to intimidate by encroaching on the space of others or even colliding directly with them. When used properly, touching, which is seemingly accidental in nature, can be used to create specific outcomes including intimacy, friendship, or to intimidate. The intent of accidental touching and the relative context will define how others interpret accidental touching and how effective it is in achieving your specific goals.

Context: a) General b) Dating c) Business or d) Friendly.

Verbal Translation: a) “Oops, sorry, my mistake”, b) “Hey look at me, I’m right here and looking for attention”, c) “Stay out of my way, I need more space – I exist,” or d) “I’m brushing up against you to bond and share space.”

Variant: See Self Stroking or Auto Contact, Head Touch (by others), Touching or Increase In Touching.

Cue In Action: a) Two people brush up against one another accidentally in a crowded elevator with no meaning at all. b) A woman backs into a man she finds interesting on the dance floor in effort to be noticed. c) Bob “accidentally” bumped up against his boss while walking to his office – he has been making a bid for the bosses’ managerial position for many months and wanted to keep him in his place. d) A husband and wife were washing and drying dishes together after dinner and accidentally brushed up against one another.

Meaning and/or Motivation: a) The cue has no specific intent. b) Feigned in a dating context where the cue signals sexual interest c) Feigned as a power play designed to intimidate. d) Usually meaningless, but can be a source of bonding by sharing intimate space.

Touch is a very powerful force and can be used to manipulate and influence others, but oftentimes, touching happens accidentally. We should be careful to properly assess the motivation of touching.

Cue Cluster: a) The head is down with no eye contact and no acknowledgement of contact is made. b) Eye contact is made with the target with a coy smile coupled with a feigned verbal apology. c) Head is down or up coupled with a forced stress smile or smirk. d) Both parties subconsciously acknowledge touching, but do not show any noticeable body language cues – they carry on with the task at hand while sharing space.

Body Language Category: Courtship Display, Indicator Of Sexual Interest (IOsI), Dominant/Aggressive Body Language, Dislike (nonverbal).

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