Very little focus has been place on how men use nonverbal communication to signal interest. Perhaps this is rightly so, perhaps not. Women are without question the most efficient users of body language in courtship. Women are, more often the not, the choosers and initiators in relationship origination, and men are often left following. The job of women is to signal to men when it’s time to display their features and “dance” for them. In other words, women are the choosers when it comes to sexual relationships, and in the body language department, if men employ it properly, they are not much more than the chosen.
What the research fails to properly address up to date, is how men can use body language after contact has been established to build attraction with women. I have devoted and entire book to this very topic in my e-book Body Language Project: Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language. It is a very complex issue so I can not deal with it in its entirety here, so I encourage anyone interested to pick the book up and read more extensively. In this book, I will hit on all the key features and main topics in male courtship body language that will be of interest to a general reader such as women and professionals. The male “pick-up-artist”, or women who wish to thwart male come-ons and pear into the minds of men, should read further with Body Language Project: Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language.
Dr. Gurian believes there are about a hundred structural differences between the male and female brain. Men tend to compartmentalize their communication into smaller parts of the brain and therefore tend to get right down to the issues whereas women’s brains gather a lot more information from different areas of the brain and therefore tend to be more detailed in their conversations. Men also show more activity in mechanical centers of the brain and females show more activity in verbal and emotional centers. These changes happen very early in boys and girls. To a little girl, a doll becomes life-like with desires, feelings, needs or in other words a life, but to a little boy, that same doll is simply an object.
The brain scans of women show that the corpus callosum which handles communication is larger than that of men’s. The corpus callosum is an anatomical part of the brain that is centered between the left and right hemisphere and helps women’s brains “talk” better across each hemisphere. The corpus callosum is a thick collection of nerve fibers that conduct information. In essence, it helps women multi-task by sending information to an fro, from one side to the other to be dissected, disseminated and refabricated as it is put through various brain centers. Men on the other hand tend to move information within the same side of the brain better and tend not to confuse issues with others. Women’s brains easily move from the right side (creative) to the left side (logical) and vice versa, very easily. This is why they often inject all sorts of emotions into their arguments and details into stories whereas men get stuck on the facts and logic and progress from A to B to C. Because of this ease of movement women can perform more operations at the same time, they can pick berries, take care of their young, and discuss camp ethics all at the same time. As it applies to our nonverbal discussion, it means that they can focus on more than just the words being spoken, they can also monitor body language as well.
So what does this all mean? Well, in practical terms, it means that women might have a better natural ability to read people. However, this book isn’t about what’s natural, it is about what can be learned and just about anyone can learn to read body language well, even if they are at an inherent disadvantage.