Tag Archive for Out Of Sight

Remaining Uncommitted

by  • March 6, 2013 • 0 Comments

When people tell the truth they will usually show extra enthusiasm and commit to their story. Liars often start off the same way, but quickly trail off.

When people tell the truth they will usually show extra enthusiasm and commit to their story. Liars often start off the same way, but quickly trail off.

Liars have been noted to be uncommitted to lies. That is, because they have nothing vested in the lie, they remain less than exuberant in their convictions. In other words, the subconscious mind of liars doesn’t allow them to carry forward with enthusiasm. Instead of smashing a fist against a table and raising a voice saying “I didn’t do it!”, liars will instead make much duller motions and use less commitment to them. It is not as if they want to lie, it is the limbic mind that won’t allow them to.

Liars will motion without emphasis, or describe events by trailing off or use weak statements. They might limit arm and hand movement by clasping them together or locking them down on an armrest with such force they turn their knuckles white. The hands might be put out of sight in pockets or under a table where they can’t be read. Reduced movement can be seen throughout the body, not just in the hands. The entire body including the head, arms, feet, and torso can seem to lock in place. People that are telling the truth spend a lot of time and energy in efforts to make the facts known which comes across in their body language and gesturing. Truth tellers are happy to spend as much time as necessary to get everything right. They will often add more detail than required and go over it again and again if necessary. Not emphasizing is linked to the freeze response where the mind clams the body shut and reduces movement so as to draw less attention to it. What is important in lie detection is to compare cues from a baseline. That is, if someone suddenly drops emphasis then you know they’ve lost interest in the topic or are lying. In either case, it will have provided useful information to the body language reader.

In writing this passage, I had just reviewed a video (see bottom posted on the web of a baseball game in which a player leaped head-over-feet clear over the catcher as he came to homeplate to score a run. The catcher, stuck in a fear response, failed to tag the runner. Baseball has an interesting tradition where it is customary for the runner to body-check the catcher at homeplate as he tries to tag for an out. While the catcher braced and ducked with his elbow up to make the tag, the runner jumped over the catcher landing on home plate. The catcher stuck with his elbow up in defense could only convince his mind to bring his arm just close enough to miss the tag! Because his mind feared the body check, he wasn’t able to follow through with what he intended. While this is an interesting fear based response what follows is even more interesting since it helps us read liars. The catcher, realizing he failed to get the out, quickly turns to pursue the runner. One must ask why he would track the runner down if he made the tag? Obviously he hadn’t! But more important that this, is that we know that he knows that he didn’t make the tag! This means that any nonverbal language following the lack of tag, should he dispute it, is read as lying language. To state his case, the catcher chats with the umpire by raising his arms showing how he made the tag. What is revealing, however, is that the catcher only slightly raises his arms instead of doing it with emphasis. Instead of showing the gesture over and over again, the catcher just raises his arms once as if to make a casual rainbow motion with his arms. When his coach shows up with arms flaying and talking with enthusiasm, the catcher quietly exits! The catcher knows that he can’t make a case and so doesn’t put any effort into trying. The difference between the coach and the catcher, is that the catcher knows he’s lying, while the coach isn’t sure. Once more, the coach isn’t actually lying anyway, since he wasn’t there to feel the contact or lack thereof of the catchers mitt and the runner, he’s just acting out an inherent bias – he’s playing the role he was hired to do. Lack of commitment is an important cue to watch for when detecting lies so be careful to watch for it.

Objects As Barriers

by  • March 6, 2013 • 0 Comments

The chair is employed to maintain distance.

The chair is employed to maintain distance.

How the environment is used by people can provide clues to their inner thoughts and emotions. For example, propping up against the wall indicates that the person is in need of support (or is really tired) which shows that they are incapable of comfort without the assistance the structure affords. Hiding a portion of the body behind a desk also indicates insecurity and we rarely invite commerce onto ourselves without placing a desk between us and our clients because we require the security it provides.

Imagine what it would be like to meeting face-to-face in an empty room. Desks and tables are more than just places to store notes! The “employee’s line” by which customers are forbidden to cross in retail stores has more to do with privacy, power and territoriality than security. What would happen if retailers could freely move into storage rooms and behind the counter, what about enter the kitchen at a dinner? The formalities of the establishment would drop significantly and it would be like being at home, free of boundaries.

The chair is a prop used to shield the body from "attack."

The chair is a prop used to shield the body from “attack.”

Even podiums creates a much needed refuge, a place of security for presenters where the self conscious can be partially out of sight, or even dodge flying tomatoes! Only those that are supremely confident or experienced in front of others will ignore the podium and instead immerse themselves into the embrace of the crowd. Women who wish to quell an advance by men can steer them away by turning a cold shoulder, a barrier, or if possible, moving to the backside of a chair which can be used as a shield. When nervous around women, on the other hand, men can use bar tops to prop up against to protect them from rejection. As you see, objects are sometimes used as crutches and at the same time indicated to us as body language readers that a person is uncomfortable standing by themselves. In other words, it tells us that they are worried that they might suffer an emotional attack so they limit their exposure. People can use chairs, lean against a bar as discussed, a beam, a table, or might simply use objects like mugs or cups, or even pens and utensils which can figuratively represent make-shift weapons. Obviously pens would never be drawn, so to speak, as a weapon, but they still offer a psychologically comforting mechanism.

The Ankle Or Scissor Cross

by  • March 5, 2013 • 0 Comments

A negative thought is present, but she's not going anywhere.

A negative thought is present, but she’s not going anywhere.

The ankle or scissor cross is where the ankles cross each other and is a posture that can happen while seated or standing. While seated this posture is a hidden form of leg crossing because it occurs discretely at the bottom of the legs and can be out of sight due to a desk or table. While standing, it is the only way legs can cross so has a similar meant to a regular full blown seated leg cross. At times the leg might be raised up the backside of the calve producing the appearance of a flamingo but this posture is mainly reserved for women. While seated, the legs can also be locked behind the legs of a chair with essentially the same message being delivered except in this case it is a restraining-freeze-behaviour. When the legs are wrapped around the chair they can’t move, hence they are locked, and are also there precisely so they don’t move, and are hence frozen. Women are also seen using the sitting position more often them men especially if they are wearing skirts, however, it is not a confident posture so should be avoided. When it does happen in men though, it should be noted since it is an unnatural position in general for them.

The ankle cross indicates that the person is holding a negative emotion, uncertainty, fear, feels discomfort or threatened, stress, anxiousness, insecurity or timidity. The ankle or scissor cross also shows reservation and self-restraint,

Lots of cues in concert. Arms in a partial-cross coupled with crossed ankles - and he's not doing much better as he 'holds himself back!'

Lots of cues in concert. Arms in a partial-cross coupled with crossed ankles – and he’s not doing much better as he ‘holds himself back!’

 

due to withholding of a thought or emotion. When being pitched, it shows resistance to the sale and when being questioned might indicate that lying is taking place. Couple interlocked legs, which is a freeze response meant to reduce foot movement, with pacifying behaviours such as rubbing the thighs palm down, as if to dry them, and you’ve got a cluster signaling that a secret is being covered. If the feet are pulled under the chair, the message is even more exaggerated. The feet are saying exactly what the person is thinking, that he or she is closed and withdrawn from the conversation. We should be watchful of this posture when presenting a controversial opinion to see what degree of disagreement is present and especially if the posture is held for a significant length of time, particularly by men. When the ankles cross it is due to a subconscious freeze response due to a threat and the legs are entwined so as to restrict and restraint movement.

As we saw previously, closing a sale or changing opinions necessitates open minds and since our bodies and minds are linked should try to open those with the scissor posture when possible. You could try to have them change positions, as above, by having them stand or relocate to a more comfortable seating location, or you could take the time to identify and address whatever issue is of concern. This is important especially if the posture preludes a more intense selling session to follow, since negative postures early on are a good predictor of the future.

Mixed message - head cocked to the side shows interest coupled with arm and ankle crossing - she's uncertain.

Mixed message – head cocked to the side shows interest coupled with arm and ankle crossing – she’s uncertain.

In a free-flowing interview or discussion noting the timing of ankle cross’ can prove valuable. With some research or prodding it might be possible to reveal the true reason for the action. Simply asking the reason for the reservation can help eliminate this posture as well because it will make the person feel listened. This is risky, though, because the primary reason for the gesture is to conceal an emotion. Conversely, giving someone the opportunity to express their thoughts makes people feel heard and sometimes that is all that is needed to open someone up. The posture after all, is a posture of hidden disagreement, so it would be hard to hold the posture as one is given the chance to open up. If the posture returns after some time, it might indicate that the person hasn’t fully disclosed their true opinion on the matter or that a new issue of contention has been uncovered. Therefore, once again, time should be taken to address any concerns that might have arisen before moving forward.