Tag Archive for Buttocks

The Ten Steps To Intimacy

by  • March 6, 2013 • 0 Comments

When men and women initiate intimacy they always follow a very specific pattern. While the list isn’t entirely rigid it represents the most universally comfortable way men and women come together. There are cases when some of the steps are skipped, but in most cases, they are simply accelerated making it appear as though steps went missing. While I have no experience with adult movies, I have been told that even therein, men and women follow these steps closely. Here are the ten steps to creating intimacy.

The arm over the shoulder is in

Hand touches shoulder. This form of touching is risky because it implies
some from of connection. If absent, can still be rebuffed with minimal damage and embarrassment, but still breaches personal space boundaries.

[A] Eye to body. The eyes first make contact with the lower part of the body, but hit the face in general, the assets – buttocks and crotch, chest or breast, the legs of women and the overall build of men. If both see mutual attraction they continue to the next step.
[B] Eye to eye. Mutual eye contact is established which includes a long intimate gaze where the eyes travel over the face including the lips.
[C] Hand touches hand. Light touching of the hand, or hand-holding is often the first way distance is breeched. The hand is intimate, yet risk-free, unlike say the breasts or the genitals! Other acceptable first touches include incidental touches such as an elbow, forearm or task directed actions such as helping to put on a coat.
[D] Hand touches shoulder. This form of touching is risky because it implies
some from of connection. If absent, can still be rebuffed with minimal damage and embarrassment, but still breaches personal space boundaries.
[E] Arm encircles waist. In this step, the arm is lowered closer to the genitals so is more intimate. This form of touching, since it requires permission and attraction, which may or may not be present, is highly risky and can spell disaster if not welcomed. However, if it is accepted, it can be used as a test to move quickly to the following step.
[F] Mouth touches mouth. This step is fairly self explanatory but is a huge milestone in a relationship. Most women remember their first kiss long after men do, but even if men forget the exact details after some time, they will always recall their conquest! When two people kiss they exchange a lot more than just spit. Chemicals in the saliva are linked to taste and if things don’t jive at this moment, everything can unravel, and quickly. Women are often heard saying “things weren’t right” or that “he was a bad kisser” and it usually has to do with pheromones they find unattractive, rather than his lack of skill. Women will let men they find attractive kiss sloppily, but mediocre men need to perform at a higher level while kissing! It has been postulated by researchers that if the unique chemical signature of men and women is too closely alike, attraction fails to materialize, most probably due to a desire to avoid inbreeding. Family members carry similar genes and therefore give off similar odors signatures and so kissing is one way to test things out before getting too heavy.
[G] Hand touches head. The head is a vulnerable part of the body so we only allow those we really trust to get close enough to play with our hair or ears or whatever. Touching and stroking the hair, plays an intimate and important role in kissing, especially the good kind of kissing.
[H] Hand touches body. Having passed all the tests listed above, couples will permit each other to explore various parts of their body, at the exclusion of the breasts and crotch and usually touching happens over the clothes. Sometimes brief forays may be permitted, but this sort of intimacy still requires caution. Touching includes stroking, fondling, tickling, caressing and are precursors to sexual intimacy. If all goes well, both bodies will become aroused to the point of no return, pushing them into the next step.
[J] Mouth touches body. Included in this step is hand under clothing. Usually either mouth or hands are permitted to touch the body. This step opens up fondling of the breasts under the clothes, and usually even permits the touching of the genitals over the clothes.
[K] Hand caresses genitals and genitals touches genitals. From steps H onward, body language lacks a visual component and so people usually dim the lights, turn them out altogether or close their eyes so they can eliminate distraction and shift their focus onto their sense of touch and smell. Intercourse is a primal activity so requires just the right ingredients in just the right ratios to work. If something isn’t quite right, then the sequence can be broken at any one stage, even at the last minute, or so I’m told!

He Displays Dominantly, Sexually, Gets Closer And Builds Rapport – Introduction

by  • March 6, 2013 • 0 Comments

Women prefer men with square jaws as it indicates the level of testosterone and hence aggression/ambition they might hold.

Women prefer men with square jaws as it indicates the level of testosterone and hence aggression/ambition they might hold.

Men and women display similarly in terms of body language, but there are some key differences when it comes to what women find attractive in men, versus what men find attractive in women. Men seek women that are submissive and willing to heed their dominance, whereas women seek men who are dominant and able to lead them. This is a general rule of course, and as we know there are exceptions to every rule, but if we are appealing to the majority of the people, which is my goal, than these generalities are adequate. Women seek out men that have the ability to gain access to resources such as food and shelter, who are protectors to them now, and in the future their offspring, and who have the physical traits they think indicate these skills such as health, vigor, and sexually virility.

Men give up plenty of cues to their virility, one of which is a tight round buttocks and lack of stomach fat. Men with round bums have been shown to be in better health and to maintain that health throughout their lifetimes. Health reports show that men who add fat to their midsection are much more prone to disease. Women also seek men with broad strong shoulders, square jaws, muscular arms and chests. Individual differences still exist as it relates to other features, for some women a hairy chest or facial hair is everything, while for others clean shaven is a must. However, nearly everyone agrees that hairy backs rank pretty low!

On average, women prefer men with more dominant features than those with submissive features. Depending on their intent however, they may at times prefer men who are more ‘feminine’ or sexier, and this is called the ‘sexy son’ theory. The theory says that women will choose men who are “pretty” based on looks alone, especially when they what to engage in risky one-night-stands. When they seek men as full time partners, on the other hand, they look for middle-of-the-road or “softer” men, in other words, ‘family-men’, since they figure they’ll be able to secure long term care in child rearing. Evolution favours both conditions where women who have random sex with “sexy fathers” so they in turn have “sexy sons” as well as women who seek out family-men who will stick around to raise families with them. In the “sexy son” scenario, the father passes on his genes to his son, but pays no, or very little effort in child care especially when compared to the family-man. The sexy-father might stick around for a few years but he’s usually distracted through proposition from other easy women – due to his sexiness he gets a lot of offers after all! This is balanced though because, while the mother is stuck raising a son on her own, he will grow up to have more or a similar number of offspring himself as will a family man. This trade-off produces more, or an equal number of children overall when compared to the family-man, making both successful strategies. We define successful in terms of making the genes for the behaviour more common or more popular. In evolutionary terms, popular genes are good genes no matter what morals are behind the behaviour. The genes merely wish, if they had wishes, to remain in existence.

He must be wealthy!

He must be wealthy!

Research tells us that men who are middle road are much less likely to stray primarily because they get fewer outside offers from women. Women who are married or in committed relationships, are more likely to cheat with men who are better looking than the average, and men who are better looking on average have more sexual relationships in their lifetime and also tend to cheat more often. A large part of this is intended to be background knowledge because it obviously doesn’t deal directly with nonverbal body language, however, it does play into the subconscious aspects and is important to frame how I view sexual body language. As always, you are welcome to disagree with my postulates and those of the scientific community, and in reality, won’t change the hidden meaning of the signals. It is my contention that knowing the ‘how’ and the ‘why’ of behaviours really give us predictive powers. These powers, in turn, give us the ability to come into novel situations, with little or no prior knowledge and deduce likely conclusions.

The Hip Tilt and Parade, The Hip-To-Waist Radio, Breasts and Buttocks

by  • March 6, 2013 • 0 Comments

Puffing out the chest can give the bosom the extra bit of attention needed to seal the deal. Like most signals, this one happens subconsciously.

Puffing out the chest can give the bosom the extra bit of attention needed to seal the deal. Like most signals, this one happens subconsciously.

Women naturally have wider hips than men in order to accommodate childbirth and it is the exaggeration of the differences between men and women the makes them sexy. Women emphasize their hips with a walk called the “parade” which happens when a woman walks with exaggerated swinging or rolling of the hips, back arched, stomach flat, breasts protruding, and head held high. Studies show us that women out of committed relationship naturally walk in this manner to attract attention. Out of consciousness the parade is not overt or striking, but now that you understand the characteristics, you can watch for it. Women can also roll their hips while standing drawing attention to their pelvic region. The gesture might be accompanied by a sideways glance and slightly parted wet lips which could be unconsciously exaggerated by saliva or lipstick.

The hip emphasis posture is pervasive in fashion and advertising. We see women slouching to one side forcing their hips out to emphasize their curves, or walk in an exaggerated way, bouncing their hips up and down as if on a pendulum. Picturing this parade or “cat-walk” in the nude and you get the sense that there is an obviously hypnotic purpose to the method. Because the hips move about a center pivot, the eye is drawn front and center to the woman’s genitals which act as a beacon.

The little black dress is a perfect example that emphasizes the hip-to-waist-ratio differences in women. Studies show us over and over again that men prefer a hip-to-waist ratio of about seventy percent. That is, men prefer women who’s waist is thirty percent smaller than their hips. Women on the other hand, prefer men’s hip-to-waist ratio to be about ninety percent or in other words, their hips are only ten percent larger than their waste. This stems from the fact that it makes them better athletes, evolutionarily linked to their ability to catch food. Female athletes, particularly world class runners, also tend to carry low hip-to-waist ratios. Research also tells us that the waist is the last place women tend to add fat so as to preserve the sexiness of their curves. These changes happen rapidly after about age eighteen, where fat is added to the buttocks and legs but stays off the stomach until much later in life at around menopause. Only with great diligence are women able to keep their stomachs flat after their childbearing years. Once again though, after childbirth the area tends to be most resilient to fat deposits and the legs and butt tend to hold the most amount of fat, serving only to further emphasize the hip-waste ratio.

Having said this, digitally altered images and women who naturally carry a higher hip-to-waist ratio, are often seen as even more alluring. It is a play on the minds of men where everything is better if bigger, and if some is good, more is best. When it comes to men, if something is worth doing at all, it’s worth overdoing! The size of women’s breast is a prime example, and came about through evolution specifically to attract and keep the attention of men. Women are rare in the animal kingdom as they have what scientist refer to as permanently swollen breasts, or breasts that are large outside of lactation, and seem to have absolutely no desirable function at all, but as a sexual selection characteristic. Interestingly though, we aren’t alone in terms of exaggeration preferences, for example, mother birds who’s eggs have been swapped for larger ones (of another species), even freakishly large ones, will tend to sit on them longer and more frequently, even sometimes abandoning other eggs in their clutch. So it appears that even mom’s like more of things, especially when some of that things is great, more is seen as greater. Universally however, men do prefer the golden hip-to-waist ratio of seventy percent and tend to prefer a c-cup sized breast which amounts to about five percent of women’s total body mass – if you really want to get technical! The point being that exaggeration tends to mesmerize and sexual body language is no different.

Invasion Of Space

by  • March 6, 2013 • 0 Comments

A violation of personal space is indicated by her withdrawal.

A violation of personal space is indicated by her withdrawal.

Most hostile interactions in our lifetime will fall short of physical conflict but that doesn’t mean aggression was never present. We hold a buffer around our bodies at a premium and yet others still fail to acknowledge this, and choose to move closer then we wish. Disrespecting someone’s personal space is a form of aggression and dominant individuals routinely ignore personal space buffers, in fact, it’s one of the ways they maintain their dominance! Invasion of personal space can even come from brief touching or pats on the back, but also from more inappropriate touching such as jabs to the ribs with fingers, pens, or worse yet, slaps to the buttocks! Sometimes space invades will gain unwanted closeness by using friendly conversation, that we naturally read correctly as feigned.

Overstepping territorial boundaries is obvious to almost everyone because most have at least a rudimentary ability to read body language. We can test proximity comfort levels by stepping only so close as that which causes the next party to step or lean back. Leaning back carries the same weight, as a message, as a full or partial step back, it is just more polite. We can use the step back technique to send this message to space invaders, but it is often ineffective, as their intentions are usually intended to yield such results. Stepping back, and then quickly placing an open palm on their wrist or arm, or hovering a hand palm-vertical near the midline between you and them will serve to anchor them, preventing further advances. Often, the only solution is to be outright with the invasion and call them out. In this case, we should expect it to cause openly negative feelings which could strain a relationship, so should be carefully considered.

Hands On Hips

by  • March 5, 2013 • 2 Comments

Strutting like a peacock. The hands draw attention to our manhood.

Strutting like a peacock. The hands draw attention to our manhood.

Having the hands on the hips or “arms akimbo” is to display like a peacock, even in people! It makes the body take up more space and hence appear larger so as to assert dominance. All the fingers also curl inward so that they point toward the crotch drawing attention in that direction which punctuates the point even further. The thumbs might also be tucked into the belt or into belt loops serving to “frame the genitals.” The message said is “There are issues here”, “Things are not right”, “I’m standing my ground” or “I’m a virile male so check me out!” Women can also be seen holding the posture although more rarely, and when they do, they will hold their hands on their hips and point their fingers to their buttocks. Pointing therefore, puts emphasis on our best assets while we state our case. Fingers pointed backwards as women do more often is a more inquisitive posture than an authoritarian one.

She's displeased and thinks you should know better.

She’s displeased and thinks you should know better.

Sexual dimorphism is a word used to describe the differences in form between males and females within the same species. In other animals, it includes horns and antlers, tusks, waddles, elaborate coloration and plumage, amongst many, many others. In humans, the dimorphism includes hairiness, perpetually swollen breasts versus muscular chests, square jaws and manly noses, internal versus external genitals, muscle mass differences, amount of fatty tissue, and hip to waste ratios (where the ratio produces an hour glass in women). In most cases, the differences between men and women are not very pronounced compared to many other animals. But when we do differ, men and women tend to display (exploit) their differences in effort to attract attention.

Like most of life’s endeavors, attention is competition based. We compete both against our own sex and for attention from the other sex. This seems like one in the same, but it is not. For example, appearing larger, heavier, taller or more muscular can serve to pique the interest of women, but also to repel nearby rivals. This is not to say that our species is cutthroat where everything boils down to competition. Instead, a large part of life involves cooperation. However, how would we know who best to cooperate with, if it wasn’t for their advantages in competition!

The hands on hips gesture is one of the ways men puff out to appear more dominant and attractive to the opposite sex and repel competition from the same sex. The cue cluster accompanying the hands-on-hips also includes an upright posture, chin up, chest out and the legs at slightly wider than shoulder width. The hands-on-hips is also a ready posture when it does not accompany more dominant cues in the cluster. In this case, it appears like a runner at the gate prepared to jump at an opportunity whatever it might be.

Territoriality and ownership is a part of the hands on hips gestures, just like placing a flag into the soil indicates a territorial line. Holding the body erect, planted, shows that the pieces of land on which we stands is ours. We occasionally see this posture in children too, as they assert their point to their adult counterparts. The referee at a sporting event will be seen holding ground with his hands on his hips as he’s met with protest from the team’s coach. He’s made a bad call, but instead of admitting it, of which let’s face it, he can’t, he instead says “I’m not going to leave, I’m the boss, what I say goes.” Meanwhile the coach will mirror this posture saying “I’m not going anywhere until I’m done doing what I came here for, so you are just going to hear me out.” Therefore the hands-on-hips body language also represents defiance. The abbreviation for the hands on hip gesture is to drop one hand, yet it remains just as potent. The other hand is usually busy gesturing more than colourful language.