Tag Archive for Space One

Cooperative Side-By-Side Position

Chairs on the same side of the table is the "cooperative" seating arrangement as no barrier is present between the participants.  It is the most open way of interacting.

Chairs on the same side of the table is the “cooperative” seating arrangement as no barrier is present between the participants. It is the most open way of interacting.

The cooperative position contrasts the casual corner position with a side-by-side orientation on the same side of the table rather than kitty-corner or cross-corner. There are two possible arrangements for the side-by-side and the variants determine the level of connectivity and interaction between two people. When the chairs are facing forward, or toward the table, it slightly inhibits eye contact decreasing the level of sharing. This orientation shows that there is some cooperation but that it’s not complete. When chairs are facing forward in this manner, it is usually because it is assumed that people are already a part of your team and the two of you are facing off against another party.

A second orientation happens when collaborating on a project. Here, the chairs will (and should) be turned at forty-five degrees toward each other. This arrangement represents intimacy since there is no barrier to interfere with the sharing of information. Working on a common goal, a project or presentation are a few examples of when it’s best to use this arrangement. Intimate couples will also choose this position at restaurants except where moving the chairs about is not permitted. Other couples fail to see this and instead choose competitive arrangements as if they are on job interviews, or are facing off against each other in twenty questions!

There are times when sitting on the same side of the table can appear too intimate, as if invading someone else’s space. One can begin by taking up positions across the table and then finding an excuse to pass documents across it. After some time, moving to the other side of the table and sitting down to clarify the information provides enough of a reason to bridge the gap between people and being fostering intimacy.

Introduction – Chapter 4

The "luncheon test" is a fun territorial game.  To play it, simply advance restaurant artifacts from your side to the other piece-by-piece over the course of a meal.  Start with the condiments (salt, pepper, ketchup, etc.) then move onto your own personal items such as your drink, an empty salad bowl, use napkins and so forth.  Watch how your guest response.  Do they push the items back to reclaim land, or do they ease back in their chair and let you have the extra space you seem to require?

The “luncheon test” is a fun territorial game. To play it, simply advance restaurant artifacts from your side to the other piece-by-piece over the course of a meal. Start with the condiments (salt, pepper, ketchup, etc.) then move onto your own personal items such as your drink, an empty salad bowl, use napkins and so forth. Watch how your guest response. Do they push the items back to reclaim land, or do they ease back in their chair and let you have the extra space you seem to require?

As a species, we have clear definitions and rules protecting ownership of our possessions for the purpose of maintaining order and reducing conflict. Territoriality describes the set of rules that govern the space around our bodies with emphasis on how we communicate ownership. A territory is defined as the space or area around a person that is claimed as their own, to the exclusion, or inclusion, of all others as they see fit. Territoriality is a key part of the human condition even though it is rarely thought about. The land our houses sit upon is owned by us and we prove this to others by way of a deed and unfortunately by the taxes we pay for the right to keep it. Most of the things inside our houses are also ours and we prove this through shear possession, unless we save our purchase receipts. There are also things we own but that occupy space that is shared by our communities, or that neighbouring communities. Our cars are owned by us, yet move about the territories of others.

Fences around our homes have become commonplace showing a greater need for us to protect what little space we own, in a rapidly expanding population, that finds itself in a shrinking community. Apartment style housing and condominiums however, prove that as land availability shrinks, our tolerance for density is increasing. As we shall see, habitation density controls personal space tolerances, that is, it controls how much empty space we require around our bodies when near other people. However we look at property and personal space, one thing is true, everyone fights to defend it.

We see this battle amongst children who fight for the front passenger seat in an automobile or among college students for the best seat on the sofa. We can also see it with office employees who fight for the best seats at the conference table, or even the best offices (usually the biggest or with the brightest window or best view). Once a territory is claimed, ownership is marked. We can mark our territory by leaving personal artifacts such as a jacket across the back of a chair or a book on a seat to reserve it. We sometimes even go so far as hiring friends as guards to hold and protect our territories when space is limited, or hold our cue in line. Status in a hierarchy alone can serve to protect territories. For example, no one would contest the boss’s or Dad’s seat at the head of the table. Curiously even habit can reserve a territory. Seating in large auditoriums (several hundred seats) in university settings is rarely assigned, yet habit says that students sit in the same general areas class after class, while most sit in the very same seat each lecture. Being usurped of a seat that has been reserved through this repeated claim can be upsetting even though no written rules exist.

As spaces become more crowded our natural response is to guard our territories with even more fervor. Cues and lines are a prime example. The longer the line and greater the wait, the more aggression people will hold against those that jump cue. Disney world has a strict no cue jumping policy for this reason. Cues are an interesting way of defining territory if you really think about it. Cues are eternally moving, and changing, yet we guard our relation to others and our nearness to our goal, whatever it might be. It has been shown that particularly violence-prone individuals such as criminals tend to have much wider personal space requirements than regular people. What seems like miles to us, might seem like inches to them. This is why respecting nonverbal body language that indicates aggression related to space invasion is vitally important so we don’t cause what is called “intrusion panic.” Incidentally, babies also suffer from panic when strangers get to close so respecting personal space goes across all people (animals too), and even while driving – hence the term “road rage.” Setting someone off who has tendencies to react physically can be disastrous and we never really know what type of person we are interacting with at a given occasion since we deal with so many strangers on a daily basis.

By examining a crowded beach area we can see rules that create territories. Our friends and family will ban together with towels and other beach artifacts to ward off others. The efficiency of the group due to its common interest allows it to expand by creating space amongst and between its members producing even more space for itself, a luxury not experienced by a single person or even a couple. Banding with others creates strength and when interests align we tend to clump and form pairs, clans, gangs, groups and so forth. If a new or better stake of land becomes available we quickly motion our troops to action, we pull up stake, and move quickly. In high stakes environments we might even send a brave individual from our clan to put up the first claim. Usually we follow first come takes claim because it is found to be a fair enough rule to abide by. Because we live in a civilized society and we jostle over generally trivial stakes our rules prohibit physical altercations.

Above: How close is too close.