Tag Archive for Lungs

Freeze, Flight or Fight

Even the fear facial expression is a classic "freeze" response.  It's as if the face has been caught in a flash of emotion.

Even the fear facial expression is a classic “freeze” response. It’s as if the face has been caught in a flash of emotion.

The fight or flight response is a bit a misnomer. It’s not actually how humans or other animals respond to stress and danger. Lazy by nature and especially cautious of injury, recall we didn’t have doctors and hospitals thousands of years ago and even today most animals receive no secondary care from veterinarians, we have evolved the proclivity to handle situations in more appropriate ways. Most animals, humans included, will naturally sequence freeze, flight and flight in that order. Freezing is important to assess the situation, for how does one know what they are running from, and in what direction, if they don’t first identify the object of their fear.

White-tailed deer will first begin by winding predators, and if they sense that it is close, may seemingly flee instantly, but usually they will freeze in place to first identify the type of predator, human or other, its location, and its proximity. They do this by tilting their heads back and passing deep breaths into their lungs through their noses and over a specialized fluid filled structure called the vomeronasal organ. For deer, it is their sense of smell that is their primary means of safety. Since their eyes are much less acute than their noses, they rely on catching movement from predators especially when they are being stalks from downwind when scenting isn’t an option. When movement is caught, deer will try to “flush” the danger by stomping a foot rhythmically before fleeing. The foot stomp is a deer’s way of nonverbally signaling to a predator that they have been made, that the “jig is up”, so to speak, and that it’s time to identify themselves. The deer knows that a predator is in the vicinity though sight, smell and sound, or possibly just has a hunch that something is amiss, and instead of fleeing outright wants to be totally certain before “hightailing it!” To a deer, or human, running at all potential danger is wasteful and time consuming and not always appropriate. By the way, the deer put his white tail up (the underside of a deer’s tail is white, hence the original of its name), and will snort-wheeze which is done by forcefully exhaling pressurized air through their mouth, to signal to predators that pursuit is futile. Because animals have no verbal language, they communicate using nonverbal signals, and in this case, it happens even across species.

When humans are presented with fearful situations, they also tend to freeze. Like in animals, movement attracts attention and so to become a less obvious target to attack, the body becomes motionless. Survivors of the Columbine shooting in 1999 played dead so as to be overlooked by the shooters Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold despite being in plain view. Some of the survivors were just a few steps away from the shooters. Freezing is an evolutionary strategy that reduces the chances that predator will identify them and switches off their attack response. In everyday life we see the freeze response when people are caught in the act of theft, when caught lying, or when hiding something. Is it an accident that police officers yell “Stop right, there” or “Freeze scumbag” when they’ve got a suspect in their sights? Screaming this might even yield a momentary freeze response if done loud enough. That is until the suspects get a chance to see who is it that uttered the command, and in which direction they should run. Shoplifters have been identified by overhead surveillance, among other body language, by the way they seem to reduce their profile, hunch over and reduce their arm movements. This is the art of “hiding in plain view” and is no different from what anyone else does when they want to get by unnoticed. I know my son is up to no good when things go particularly quiet in the house. More often then not I’m right!

People will habitually freeze when they are scolded, children and adults alike, and sometimes reduce their breath rate especially under intense scrutiny. Stress can therefore cause shallow breathing, which is why we remind people through meditation to take deep breaths to dissipate tension. You may notice someone holding their breath or even pushing breath through their mouths, we call these sighs, and it indicates stress and hidden tension. Sometimes the cheeks are puffed out where air is slowly exhaled and other times sign are riddled throughout conversation or while busy doing other tasks. If you notice someone consistently doing this you know it’s their way of “Blowing off steam.” Be watchful of the freeze response because in context can tell you that someone is stressed and is trying to go under the radar. Be particularly conscious of freezing that happens suddenly by the presence of others as it will tell you who is the object of fear. Children that suddenly freeze when a relative comes near, is telling you that they feel uncomfortable around them, and this should worry you. A wife that clams up when her husband is around, but is otherwise bubbly and personable, might be saying that she fears his reprimand because she has upset him, or might even fear upsetting him by making a social blunder. When it comes to fear-freezing, it is the sudden change from fluid to freeze that tells us what has caused it.

The Meaning Behind Arm Crossing

Depending on the context, arm crossing might mean someone is physically cold - or emotionally cold.

Depending on the context, arm crossing might mean someone is physically cold – or emotionally cold.

Arms in the non-verbal world are shields. Folding the arms across the body is like cutting off access to our core that houses our vital organs, our heart and lungs. Just like putting up a shield, the arms protect us, not only from physical attack which can elicit closed body language, but it also protects us from unwanted outside views which we do not agree with. Therefore, having the arms across the chest can mean that either a physical threat or emotional threat is present. Arms crossed, in meeting or conversation means that the person is defensive, negative, uncertain and insecure and naturally, what is being asked of them will be met with disagreement.

An abbreviated arm cross where the hand seems to perform a necessary task.  In reality, this person feels uncomfortable and is shielding themselves.

An abbreviated arm cross where the hand seems to perform a necessary task. In reality, this person feels uncomfortable and is shielding themselves.

Arm crossing happens much more frequently in public than anywhere else. We especially see it in elevators, when exposed to a large group that makes us uncomfortable or when pitched a bad deal from a door-to-door salesman. When in public, arm crossing is due to the stress of being in a novel environment rather than due to holding negative thoughts per se. Women who are unreceptive to a pick-up at a bar or club will also be found holding this posture so as to maintain their personal space and thwart sexual advances.

As you read body language, you will eventually come across someone that tries to convince you that their closed language is a function of comfort, as in it just feels right, rather than as a tell to some underlying stress. However, arm crossing is one of the gestures that proves the body language rule rather than disproves it. The research makes it clear though, that we adopt positions because there is an underlying emotion attached to it and that this is the reason which makes the position comfortable and rather than the other way around. Body language feels right when we express underlying feelings because it provides us with a release. Conversely, if we wish to avoid closed body postures, or any bad postures for that matter, we must first attack and cure the root source of the emotion and then open posture will come naturally.

Arm crossing takes up various forms too besides the recognizable full arm cross. The more evident and strong the arm crossing, the more seeded the action is in the mind of the person executing it. As body language senders we should always try to hold opened and honest body language as a default condition as it will yield the best results under most circumstances.

Here are some examples:

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BodyLanguageProjectCom - Body Raising Or Elevation 3

A hidden arm cross showing disagreement and withdrawal.

A masked arm cross.

A masked arm cross.

[ONE] Resting one arm straight out onto the table to the front and placing the opposite hand on the wrist or forearm of the other [images show other variations of this posture].

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The coffee cup barrier - even drinks can fudge as a shield.  To look open with a drink, simply drop the drink to your side or set it down to leave your body open.

The coffee cup barrier – even drinks can fudge as a shield. To appear open, simply drop the drink to your side or set it down.

[TWO] Holding a drink in one hand with the arm perpendicular to the body (parallel to the table) with or without applying weight to the arm [image shows other variation of this posture].

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The 'figure four leg' lock - note the leg forms the 4 shape with hands locking it in.

The ‘figure four leg’ lock – note the leg forms the 4 shape with hands locking it in.

Figure four leg lock.

Figure four leg lock.

[THREE] Crossing one leg over the knee of the other and holding the ankle to lock it in.

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A childhood throwback - making us feel held and protected.

A childhood throwback – making us feel held and protected.

It looks like the conversation is going well, but the arms are being gripped showing negative thoughts.

It looks like the conversation is going well, but the arms are being gripped showing negative thoughts.

[FOUR] Full self embrace where the arms are unlocked.

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A partial arm cross.

A partial arm cross.

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Incomplete Arm Crossing Or Incomplete Crossed Arms 3

Replicating Mom holding our arm and protecting us.

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Incomplete Arm Crossing Or Incomplete Crossed Arms 1

Another version of an arm cross for defense.

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Crossing 3

Cutting off ventral access is a closed body position.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[FIVE] The opposite hand reaches over the body to grab the elbow or shoulder of the opposite arm.

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Covert insecurity.

Covert insecurity.

BodyLanguageProjectCom - Incomplete Arm Crossing Or Incomplete Crossed Arms 4

It reminds us of Mom keeping us safe.

[SIX] Subtle arm crossing where the hand grabs the wrist of the opposite side.

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The arm crosses and seems to serve a supportive role.

The arm crosses and seems to serve a supportive role.

[SEVEN] The arm crosses and seems to serve a supportive role.

 

 

 

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Hand seems to alleviate an itch.

Hand seems to alleviate an itch.

[EIGHT] Hand seems to alleviate an itch.

 

 

 

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Good things are not on the horizon.

Good things are not on the horizon.

While most closed body language means that a negative attitude is present, context permitting, there exist varying degrees. For example, full arm crossing accompanied by expressionless faces, a tense, rigid, or hostile posture with limbs that appear frozen runs the gambit of rejection. Tentative closed body language where only some blocking is happening will show a semi-relaxed body language, possible boredom, a neutral face and moderate movement of the arms and hands. In the first case, where closed language is extreme, getting any kind of agreement is unlikely. The second set of postures says that there’s a possibility of forming an agreement. So rather than depicting “no”, some closed body language says “Maybe” or “I’ll think about it.”

The head titled at 45 degrees says that there's a chance to close this deal.

The head titled at 45 degrees says that there’s a chance to close this deal.

Opened and closed body language as we have seen is a matter of degree. Language that has no closed body positions says “yes” some closed means “maybe” and a lot means “no.” This is highly useful especially if you wish to sway a target. Men who wish to proposition women can read between the lines. If they see a half arm cross where one arm holds the elbow of the other, then he may still have a shot as she could just be timid. In this case, she is telling you that she is uneasy with your approach but might accept your proposal if you can present a better pitch. Because her mind isn’t completely made up it would be worthwhile to continue. But if she has a hostile expression, with arms tightly folded across her chest, with her head cocked to the side she probably isn’t willing to hear your pitch, so it would be a waste of time to continue. Reading negative body language can help us read employers as we look for pay raise, better deals on a watch or jewelry, getting permission from those in authority and generally gaining access to resources we ordinarily wouldn’t.

Be careful with the pressure you apply. You may be able to get a better deal from a used car salesmen, but when dealing with employees, an employer or a client, it’s probably best to keep body language open and inviting.

Ventral Displays

When the chest is turned away, this is called "ventral denial."  It says, "I don't like what you're saying."

When the chest is turned away, this is called “ventral denial.” It says, “I don’t like what you’re saying.”

Torsos house important organs that are vital to keeping us alive. Our heart, lungs, liver, intestines and so forth are all easily accessible through a thin layer of skin, fat, muscle and sometimes ribs and a sternum although even these have spaces by which damage may be inflicted. Exposing our ventral side means that we trust we won’t be attacked. Laying on our backs is something we do only in our own houses because it exposes our bodies to attack and paralyzes us from defending ourselves.

Women, in the wrong company will feel particularly sensitive about exposing their breasts and both sexes will avoid displaying their genitals when nervous or timid. This is where arm and leg crossing is prevalent creating shields so as to reduce threatening exposure. Other times, bodies may turn away from people with whom we lack trust, or we may distance our torsos to give us a time and space buffer so that if a threat should be advanced, we have enough of a cushion to escape.

His ventral display says that he's ready to leave.

His ventral display says that he’s ready to leave.

When in conversation people will orient their ventral side to those they trust the most and away from those they trust least. They’ll also favour those with whom they agree with most and away from people they disagree with or have contempt for. People can be seen changing their orientation more and more over the course of a conversation as ideas diverge. In dating, as women are turned off by an approach they will first shift their feet toward the exit, followed by the torso. If they wish to remain polite so as not to offend, they might keep their faces oriented toward their solicitor, yet the rest of their body, the important parts, will face away. Even slight disagreement can produce ventral shifts as bodies orient away from the speaker based on topics of lessor interest or topics we wish not do discuss.

Ventral distancing.

Ventral distancing shows a lack of commonality.

Ventral distancing is also a nonverbal cue that indicates agreement. When people don’t like what they are hearing, they will slouch or lean backward to indicate that they aren’t seeing eye-to-eye on matters. On the other hand, when people agree, they will move toward each other to shrink the distance. When presenting a lecture, it’s easy to measure audience interest because those most keen will be sitting “at the edge of their seat” hanging onto every word. The bored or disinterested will be slouching or sitting low in their seats perhaps awkwardly to one side as if ready to take flight.

When we are reunited with loved ones we take part in hugs which is intimate precisely because the torsos are sandwiched together. We even move our arms away from our fronts so that we can get even closer. Children love to receive “raspberries” where air is blown onto their stomachs and will permit it because they trust their parents or family members. However, even with children they’ll “turn their backs on us” when they are upset with us as we enforce rules. This is a nonverbal way to show disagreement. Lovers in deep conversations will move closer to each other and face head on indicating a trust and showing no desire to leave or exit the situation which might happen by turning the torso away. Orienting the torso forward says that this is the direction in which someone is thinking about moving and when lovers do this, it means they wish to move into one another; to kiss. In a business context, people who agree with turn their bodies so they more closely face each other, even while sitting, and away from those whom they disagree with. This is called “ventral fronting” or “ventral denial.”

To use ventral language best, lean forward and drop the arms to the side when you wish to project agreement but when the opposite is desired feel free to side back in a chair or lean back or turn to the side and cross the arms. Making friends with all people is not always desirable especially when someone is malicious and unpopular. Being courteous all the time, to all people is a misuse of proper body language so use the nonverbal language that is most appropriate for the feelings you want to convey.