Body Language of Suckling
Cue: Suckling.
Synonym(s): Mouthing An Object, Chewing On A Pen, Pen Sucking, Sucking On A Pen (or other), Oral Fixation.
Description: When any object including pens or fingers are brought to the lips and chewed or sucked on.
In One Sentence: Suckling indicates a need for self-soothing due to negative feelings.
How To Use it: While suckling can help produce comfort, it is not considered a cue that should be used in full view of others as it is unlikely to produce a desirable impression.
Context: a) General. b) Dating.
Verbal Translation: “I’m in need of an oral fixation to calm my nerves so I’m suckling – on my finger or pen, as I did when I was a baby.”
Variant: See Hand to Mouth, Lip Chewing or Chewing The Lips, Hair Play, Nail Biting.
Cue In Action: a) Debbie was a shy, timid person, she kept her gaze low, easily blushed, and was quiet around strangers. This was especially so when put on the spot or questioned. At her desk, she habitually mouthed pens, paper clips, or chewed on her fingers. a) During the exam, the student mouthed her pen as she suffered through a question she wasn’t familiar with. b) Debbie was thinking about Mark and subconsciously tapped the end of her pen against her lower lip. The pen was a phallic replacement.
Meaning and/or Motivation: The mouth and lips are full of nerve endings which, when stimulated, provides tactile gratification and comfort. However, anytime the fingers go to the mouth such as playing with the side of the mouth or lip, it’s a retrogressive action indicating insecurity. These types of gestures are called “pacifying behaviours” because they are designed to reduce anxiety when someone is exposed to something distressing. Pacifying language tells us that the mind is not at ease, and it is attempting to restore the body’ natural state.
Suckling body language essentially turns us back into babies or at least indicates to others our need for self-soothing due to emotional stress.
Adults that are tense or anxious will play with their mouth or lip. Mouthing a pen, cigarette, hair, and even a piece of gum during emotional distress are substitutes for the mother’s breast. They remind us of early childhood mouthing. Sucking, like plucking, picking or chewing the lips or rubbing them with a finger or thumb are all forms of auto touching. Confident individuals would never consider using these types of security blankets.
Alternatively, an object to the mouth can represent a phallic purpose. Subconscious controls can lead one to bring an object to the mouth during sexual thoughts. The pen for example, can be a substitute for a penis during arousal.
Cue Cluster: Watch for other negative emotional cues such as pinching the skin, scratching, smoothing clothing, eye aversion, head lowered, blushing, trembling, attempt to exit (escape movements), ventral denial, turning the body away, sweating and so forth.
Body Language Category: Amplifier, Auto contact or self touching, Boredom body language, Courtship displays, Displacement behaviour, Embarrassment (nonverbal), Emotional body language, Idiosyncratic body language, Indicators of sexual interest (IOsI), Low confidence body language, Oral displacement activities, Pensive displays, Pseudo-infantile gestures, Pacifying body language, Security blankets, Shy nonberbal, Worry body language.
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