Body Language Project: Dating, Attraction And Sexual Body Language

Image 9256: Scarlett is showing a lot of interest in this photograph.  She is displaying an open posture with legs apart and is making eye contact, two signals of interest.  She also is completely focused on Dave, which is obvious by the way her hand is positioned to support her head.  What is most prominent in this photograph is that she is displaying a very vulnerable part of her body – her wrist.  This is a very sensitive area and showing it in this way proves that she is comfortable and trusting of Dave.  Dave is also playing along by mirroring Scarlett’s body postures.  If she is following Dave’s postures, the signal of attraction through the “mating dance” would be even stronger.  Dave could test Scarlett’s interest by moving one part of his body to see if she would then change her posture to imitate it.  This could happen immediately, or up to one minute later, and would still constitute interest.

Image 9295: Pointing is a way for a person to outline where they would rather be.  Scarlett is saying that she would rather be with Dave and is most likely speaking with a friend about him.  Because Dave is not attuned to her body language and his surroundings, he is missing all the signals.

Image 9400: Available women will commonly do what is called the tap.  It is performed by crossing the arms and then using the index finger to tap the forearm.   A woman will usually do this as she scans the room and spots someone of interest.  She may perform this in accompaniment with the room-encompassing glance.  If she does this while looking at you, it can be understood as a desire for you to approach her and that such an approach would be welcomed.  The tap is like an abbreviated finger motion (as in, “come here”).

Image 9274: This is full on mirroring and a very powerful positive signal.  Notice that each body part reflects what the other person is doing.  Dave might test her interest by changing his posture and then seeing if she adopts the same position.  It may take a few seconds to occur, in which case it would constitute “echoing.”  If mirroring is not occurring naturally by the woman, a man could test a woman’s interest by adopting a similar position as hers to see if it makes the woman uncomfortable.  If she then quickly changes her position to become dissimilar again, then naturally, it would indicate disinterest.  We like to seem as different as possible from those we don’t like or agree with.

Image 0667: Full mirroring is occurring here which is signaling interest.  Mark has his left arm up on the bar and Julie has her right arm up.  The same body position is duplicated in each, except in its opposite.  This means there is a connection between the two of them.  If either Mark or Julie were disinterest then their would modify their position so as to become different.

Image 9504: Dancing is a great way to test a woman’s interest.  If she is interested in you she will begin to mirror or echo your body positions.  Since dancing is so fluid, it provides a great opportunity to verify this.  If she is disinterested, she will show poor eye contact, be looking away or at other people, and in essence, will be doing her own thing.  Her dance moves will be independent of yours and won’t occur in synchrony.

Image 9059: Scarlet is showing that she wants to move closer to Dave without actually doing so.  Can you see why?  Her right leg is pointing and extended toward Dave.  We point and look in the direction we want our bodies to be.

Image 9191: Scarlett is again showing interest with legs crossed toward Dave.  She is also very likely to be aroused by what he is saying, or simply by his presence, which is indicated by the fact that she is touching and stroking her neck.  She has opened up her body posture by reaching for her glass, and shows strong eye contact, which are all positive.  Dave is in good shape here.

Image 9729: There are two prominent signals of attraction in this photograph.  The most obvious is that Scarlett is crossing her legs higher than she normally would.  Her right leg is crossed high over her knee with one leg firmly rested on the other.  The higher the leg cross, the more interest shown.  The second is that she is performing a wrist display by resting her head on her hand.  The look on her face leads one to believe that she is not simply doing this because she is bored.

Image 0409: Julie is showing a few signs of interest toward Mark in this situation.  Her left leg is tucked under her thigh and she is sitting on it.  The conversation must be going well as this indicates her willingness to stay seated.  She is also grooming herself by playing with her hair and is making strong eye contact.  Mark’s posture is a mixture of open and closed.  He is leaning forward to engage Julie but his hands are crossed over his body.  This is an excellent way to keep a woman guessing and induce her to pursue the man instead of always the reverse.

Image 9699: This photograph illustrates “tibial torsion.”  It is a childish posture.  Scarlett’s toes are pointed inward and it shows that she is meek and willing to submit to Dave.  It is a way for her to appear smaller and less dominant by shrinking the amount of space her body takes up.  She is also looking over a raised shoulder, to a degree, which is another signal of attraction.

Image 8739: Having the head tilted at a 45 degree angle represents undivided attention and interest in the communication that is present.  Scarlett is facing Dave and he is obviously saying something amusing.  It is fairly easy to catch people doing this especially if you are with a group of people.  Those most immersed in the conversation will have their heads cocked to the side and there will be varying degrees of head tilt (or no tilt) for the remaining members of the group.  Because eye contact is present and her head is tilted, you can safely ignore the fact that her arms are crossed (which is negative) as it becomes insignificant.

Image 8760: This is a shoulder shrug.  It’s a demonstration of meekness and shows the person of interest that she is willing to let her guard down.  Shoulder shrugs represent a shift toward postures exhibited by children which is part of courtship.  While this posture is exaggerated and obvious for some women it might only be a slight raise of the shoulders for others.  Like all body language, it is done subconsciously and is directed toward people we like and are attracted to.

Image 8785: The neck is an intimate zone of our bodies.  We use it often in seduction and it is a great place to kiss and induce arousal.  The reason it is so attractive is because it is vulnerable, and seduction is all about breaking down barriers between the sexes.  Scarlett is not only displaying her neck, but is also stroking it.  Subconsciously she is probably imagining that Dave is kissing it.  Also note that she has removed her hair to expose her neck even more.

Image 8803: Any motion that exposes skin is a positive signal.  Scarlett has removed her hair from her neck and placed it above her head.  She is showing off for Dave.

Image 8752: A hair toss accompanied by eye contact is almost always a great sign of interest.  Here, Scarlett is showing off the luster in her hair and hopefully Dave is reading the signals.

Image 8828: Grooming, and in this case combing her hair with her hand, is a method women use to attract male attention.  It serves to draw their eyes to their prominent features.  Caution is important, as some women naturally groom at all times and in the presence of all people.  Thus, it is important to use accompanying cues to ascertain true interest.

Image 8834: Wrapping the hair around the neck is a sign of interest.

Image 9657: The wrist is a very delicate and sensitive area of the body.  Whenever it is displayed or made obvious, it is a positive signal.  It is often much more subtle than in this photograph, but if you notice wrist flashes or exposure, you should note interest.

Image 8920: Any form of grooming is a signal of positive interest.  Scarlett could be doing anything from adjusting herself to adjusting her mate.  It all means the same and indicates interest.

Image 8846: There are multiple signals of attraction here.  Scarlett has her neck exposed, she is subtly playing with her hair, is exhibiting strong eye contact, and is also allowing Dave to initiate touching.  She is definitely interested.

Image 9386: Women are not immune from scanning over men of interest.  While women are not as overt as men, these fleeting glances do occur.  This is why a good friend or wingman is important to assist you by cataloguing which woman are sending eye shots in your direction.  Clearly, Scarlett is casting a stare at Dave’s buttocks, but this glance will be so quick it will be barely perceivable to anyone not aware of her interest.

Image 9224: This is a strong indicator of interest.  Scarlett is performing what is called the forehead bow.  It occurs when the head is tilted downwards and the person of interest is looked up at “through” the forehead.  It is akin to what happens in Asian cultures with the bow.  She is also delivering two other signals.  Can you identify them?  The next is open legs.  The greater the leg spread, the greater the interest.  The final show of interest is the skirt hike.  She is using her right hand to slightly raise her skirt to expose more leg.  With all these in combination, it would be foolish to think that she is not interested in Dave.

Image 9577: Lip puckering is a very obvious signal of attraction and is a particularly good indicator that she is prepared to kiss Dave.  Her eyes may or may not be directed toward Dave but the signal is still the same.  However, this cue should be used in association with other cues before any action is taken.  Some women naturally pucker all the time, as they are trying to attract attention from men.

Image 8562: Touching is always a good positive signal even if it’s “accidental.”

Image 0619: This is a less intimate form of touching.

Image 9628: This is a much more intimate hug.  Scarlett is entwined in Dave’s arms and her chest is thrust against his.  Much more interest is displayed in this hug versus a loose hug.  She is even up on her toes to bring her head closer to his.

Image 9599: Any sort of playful or childish antics mean interest and are positive in nature.  Stealing a hat, a shirt, a pencil and so forth, all symbolize the desire to play and hence become more intimate.

Image 9434: Whenever a woman either directly or indirectly shrinks the distance between you and her, this is a positive signal of attraction.  Clearly, Scarlett is beckoning Dave to come closer.  Dave should respond casually, and perhaps a bit teasingly, to her advances.  He could play hard-to-get as well by resisting her forwardness.  It would be counterproductive for him to be at her beck and call for the duration of the evening.  Dating is a push-pull affair, so he needs to be pushing and resisting in order to induce her into continuing her pursuit.

Image 8917: Scarlett is demonstrating another signal of interest.  She is rubbing her sensitive wrist against her forearm.

Image 9674: Does Scarlett’s hair really need fixing?  Grooming and preening are both positive signals and so too is the hair toss.  She is drawing attention to herself and because she is doing it in front of Dave, she wants him to notice.  She will probably proceed to shake her hair out or toss it, and may or may not put it back up in a ponytail.  Along with other signals, she is trying to secure the man’s attention.

Image 9485: Both are in the sprinter’s position.  They are leaning forward with hands on their thighs.  This shows an eagerness to either leave to another location or join the dance floor.  If it was late in the night or the conversation was escalating in intimacy, Dave could easily ask her to leave with him.

Image 1075: There are four signs of interest in this photograph.  Julie has her neck exposed, she is displaying her wrist, she is making eye contact and isn’t showing any closed body positions.

Image 0538: Overall, Julie is more interested than disinterested here but it is still ambiguous at best.  Her legs are crossed, her left arm is blocking her torso, and her left foot is pointed away – all signs of disinterest.  However, she is showing her wrist by playing with her ear, so there may be some moderate interest.  She is definitely not doing the full body dance for Mark.

Image 0476: Here Julie is showing two cues of interest and two cues of disinterest.  Can you spot them?  The signals of disinterest are fairly obvious.  They are legs and arms crossed.  The interest indicators are her eye contact and most significantly having her head cocked at 45 degrees.  From these cues, it may take Mark some time to open her up.  He can gauge his success throughout the interaction by monitoring for open body positions.

Image 0549: The conversation is going well between the two.  Julie is engaged and interested as her head is cocked at 45 degrees.  Her legs are crossed away from Mark so she is still somewhat reserved in his presence.

Image 0549: The conversation is going well between the two.  Julie is engaged and interested as her head is cocked at 45 degrees.  Her legs are crossed away from Mark so she is still somewhat reserved in his presence.

Image 9265: Drinking in unison and in between topics of conversation is a positive sign of interest.  It is an overall part of the mating dance.  Imitative body language is a way to establish a connection and, for both the man and woman, a way to test compatibility.  It’s a way for their bodies to connect without touching at all.

Image 9372: Playing with a piece of jewelry can be particularly seductive depending on how it is done.  When a woman becomes aroused all her senses become heightened.  This is partially why playing with an object becomes more pleasurable.  It is a naturally flirty thing to do and draws attention to her neck and chest.

Image 9361: Glancing in a mirror is simply an extension of self-grooming.  In an effort to get noticed by her man of interest, Scarlett is showing that she is taking care of herself and wants to look her best in order to attract a mate.  If this is done in front of Dave, then he can be certain that she is doing it for his benefit.

Image 0896: Julie is making an advance on Mark in this situation.  Can you tell why?  Her body postures are all pointed toward Mark despite the fact that his are all pointed away from her.  Mark avoids turning around completely.  He is therefore making Julie continue her pursuit of him.  Julie is giving off positive signals of interest which includes toes pointed inwards, arms open and leaning in toward Mark.

Image 0907: Touching in this way is an overt signal of interest from the woman toward the man.

Image 0761: Julie is checking Mark out by looking seductively through her hair.  She is giving him full rights to further the engagement.

Image 0829: Julie is looking toward Mark’s crotch which is a sure sign of interest.  Ever wonder about the symbolism of the tie?  It points like a giant arrow to the genitals of the man.  Julie has fallen for this trick.

Image 0631: Julie is performing the neck display and is also stroking it with her hand.  These are flirty gestures especially since she is close to Mark and is aware that he is observing them.

Image 0558: This is a fairly classic situation.  Julie is by herself, possibly awaiting friends.  Mark has moved closer to Julie and her posture remained neutral.  Because she didn’t remove herself or close up her position, Mark could accept this as an invitation to approach.  Her head is slightly tilted toward him as well, whereas it could have been moved in the opposite direction.  Mark shouldn’t wait much longer to make is approach.  The longer he waits, the more awkward it will be and the more Julie will become frustrated and shift her focus.

Image 0631: Julie is performing the neck display and is also stroking it with her hand.  These are flirty gestures especially since she is close to Mark and is aware that he is observing them.

Image 9394: Here Scarlett is overtly checking Dave over.  This sort of behaviour is more commonly performed by men, but as women become more empowered and liberated they have become freer to express their interest.

Image 9351: Grooming is a primitive signal of interest.  Here, Scarlett picks some imaginary lint from Dave’s shirt.  Grooming could also take place by adjusting a shirt collar, fixing an out of place hair, or a multitude of other things.  All are indicators of interest.

Image 9707: Scarlett is in a fairly comfortable position, but more so than that, she is showing interest by drawing attention to the space between her legs.  She also shows some meekness by having her toes pointed inwards.  She has put her entire body on display in this position and it is all as a show for Dave.

Image 9064: Seeing as how this is an initial meeting, Dave has met a willing partner.  She is touching his knee which is an obvious and overt sexual signal.  She is also leaning forward and practically forcing herself into him.  Dave seems to know that she is into him at this point as well and is looking toward her mouth in anticipation.

Image 9207: Scarlett is for the most part displaying interest in Dave despite having her legs crossed away from him.  She is showing great eye contact with a slight smile and is playing with her hair which is a sign of arousal.  Her left arm is closed off however, but this is overshadowed by the grooming she is doing to her hair in combination with her eye contact.  Dave is showing a confident and relaxed posture.  When he is finished with his drink, he would be best to place it on the bar top and use his hands to gesture while in conversation.  He could also place his hand on his knee where it would be in plain sight or use it to further the attraction with subtle and fleeting touching.

Image 9713: There is a mix of signals given off by Scarlett here.  She is definitely comfortable, which is obvious because she is dangling one shoe from her foot.  This shows that she is not in any rush or worry about making a quick exit.  Her legs are crossed however, which is a closed body position that could show disinterest.  She seems to be fairly slumped over and therefore disinterested, and is using her right arm to block herself off.  Her left hand is playing with her upper chest, which combined with a blank stare on her face, is a signal of boredom.  These cues could either be because she is not interested in Dave, the atmosphere, or is just having a bad day.  Either way, Dave should do something to liven things up.

Image  9718: Even though the distance between Dave and Scarlett is casual versus intimate, Scarlett is using positive body language to signal her interest.  She is playing the tease by exposing her upper thigh by pulling up her skirt and is combining this with eye contact.

Image 9188: Dave is slightly leaning forward in this photograph which shows interest, but could also show neediness if done excessively.  If he was any more forward he’d be at her whim and this would be defined as pecking, just as a bird succumbs to his dinner by pecking forward.  His hands on his lap show his willingness to get up and go wherever she pleases.  This is akin to the sprinters’ position.  Scarlett, on the other hand, is showing signs of interest with strong eye contact and a slight smile.  Most prominently, she has her legs crossed toward Dave which is another sign of interest.  It is always important to take leg crossing in association with other gestures as often people have a leg cross preference.  Scarlett is also showing some defensive postures as her arms are crossed.  This is a way for her to protect herself from intrusion because figuratively it’s a way to protect the vital area of the body – the heart and lungs – from attack.

Image 8896: Rubbing the hands is a universal symbol for expecting to receive something.  It’s figuratively similar to cleaning one’s hands.  It might also be a response to an increase in sweat production making the hands more itchy, which could be due to her sexual interest in Dave.  Rubbing the hands can be taken as a signal of interest.

Image 8924: When aroused, all the senses become heightened.  Arousal also causes excitement which may cause a woman to fidget and repetitively stroke objects.  If this is done with flirty dialogue and eye contact, then it can be taken as a sign of interest and attraction.

Image 9682: Scarlett is showing positive interest here.  She has all of her hair in her hands and has placed it on top of her head.  What makes this more powerful is that she is continuing her eye contact with Dave throughout.  To further her interest, she might turn her head at a 45 degree angle or else look at him over a raised shoulder with her body facing slightly away from him.

Image 0667: Full mirroring is occurring here which is signaling interest.  Mark has his left arm up on the bar and Julie has her right arm up.  The same body position is duplicated in each, except in its opposite.  This means there is a connection between the two of them.  If either Mark or Julie were disinterest then their would modify their position so as to become different.

Image 9305: Dave seems a little awkward in this situation and this is made obvious by putting one hand in his pocket.  This could be because Scarlett is showing interest demonstrated by her right foot.  She has extended her foot into Dave’s personal space.  This is a subtle way for Scarlett to move a part of her body into Dave’s space without actually having to overtly move her body forward.  It is also a way of pointing to where she would rather be.  There is some incomplete mirroring where her left hand and his right hand are up on the bar and fairly close in proximity.  Scarlett could also add to the positive body language with some subtle and “accidental” touching.

Image 0757: Touching in association with eye contact is a signal of interest.

Image 9256: Scarlett is showing a lot of interest in this photograph.  She is displaying an open posture with legs apart and is making eye contact, two signals of interest.  She also is completely focused on Dave, which is obvious by the way her hand is positioned to support her head.  What is most prominent in this photograph is that she is displaying a very vulnerable part of her body – her wrist.  This is a very sensitive area and showing it in this way proves that she is comfortable and trusting of Dave.  Dave is also playing along by mirroring Scarlett’s body postures.  If she is following Dave’s postures, the signal of attraction through the “mating dance” would be even stronger.  Dave could test Scarlett’s interest by moving one part of his body to see if she would then change her posture to imitate it.  This could happen immediately, or up to one minute later, and would still constitute interest.

Image 9786: Scarlett is showing a little bit of defiance in this photograph.  She is in Dave’s space, perhaps blocking him from his shot, and has her arms crossed.  If her face had a more playful appearance it could be because she is teasing him, but this is obviously not the case here.  She seems to be looking for a fight and is probably trying to make a point.

Image 8732: Scarlett is trying to draw attention to herself.  She might also be nervous and thus more active with her body positions.  Stretching is something people normally do to relieve pressure, and in this case, Dave is causing her to become excited and tense.  Her interest would be even more obvious if she motioned her stretching toward Dave by extending her arms in that direction.  An acceleration of behaviour is a great positive signal that arousal and interest are present.

Image 9790: A perfect body mirror is a sure sign of attraction.  The mating dance has occurred when complete synchrony is established.  This could happen anywhere from 15 minutes to 3 hours or more.  More often than not, incomplete mirroring occurs when some, but not all of the body positions are adopted.  Echoing is when the same positions are imitated but only after some time has passed.

Image 9806: We look toward where we want to be.  Scarlett has her hand in the cookie jar on this one.  Dave should take this as a sign of interest.

Image 8873: Showing the vulnerable area, the wrist, could be a signal of interest.  Eye contact is also present.

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